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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

"I can't eat too much Christmas lunch, I'm too full of pringles". WTAF?!!

290 replies

Flubba · 27/12/2011 07:01

Okay, so custy clearly wins on the shit Christmas front, but I'd like to hear your crappy Christmas stories. It'd give me good cheer! Xmas Grin

Mine was the line "I can't eat too much Chritsmas lunch, I'm too full of pringles " from my FIL after I'd been preparing and cooking all fecking morning and then some. Xmas Angry Xmas Hmm

for the sake of those getting their Christmas knickers in a twist about this not being an AIBU Xmas Wink, here goes...

OP posts:
Moominsarescary · 27/12/2011 20:09

We opened presents at home then arrived at my mums for 9.30, so 3 of the 4 grandchildren could open presents togeather. Adults opened theirs after so children were happily buisy playing.

Dinner was at 3pm, ds3 9 months and dn20 months ate sandwiches at 12, dn and dsis and her husband left to have dinner with her dh's family, dn was asleep by thus point so had dinner later on. Ds is a little gannit so managed to eat his Christmas dinner with us even after having a sandwich at 12

No fussing over present opening or children eating before dinner was served

PenguinArmy · 27/12/2011 20:11

Apparently first christmas's (one actual and one first proper christmas as she's 21 month and our flights were cancelled last year to come home) are for Grandparents. :( I hardly saw our DD as they wanted to take her to the park (fair enough, but sprung on us at last minute), taken to every room of the house bar the one I was in (even taken out of room when she ventured in to play elsewhere) and presents were opened with them, facing away from me so couldn't even see her face or take photos most of the time.

They lose out though, not bloody going there again.

moonbells · 27/12/2011 20:20

Why thankyou Clam I shall put it in the traditional place for such things (the loo, I believe!)

CheerfulYank · 27/12/2011 20:24

MrsWhitaker your MIL sounds ridiculous. Well done you for putting up with her.

What is it with some old ladies and their obsession with calling people fat?! Seriously! My grandmother is a prize on that front. She constantly remarks on my or my female cousins' weight. I'll mention I haven't seen my cousin for awhile and miss her, and her first remark is "Oh Jane is getting to be such a...big girl. Big boned. Solid. She'll have to watch that." One of my other cousins told me that when our Grandma saw her at her college graduation the first thing she said was "Emily, have you put on weight? You're looking rather...buxom." Xmas Hmm

Megatron...no words. None. Shock

Katisha · 27/12/2011 20:50

Where's Megatron - I want to know if she caved in and rang the MIL or not!

clam · 27/12/2011 20:54

I reckon she did, and is now lying on her bed with her hands over her eyes regretting it. And wondering how she can crepp back on here and confess!

NonnoMum · 27/12/2011 21:27

Suggestion to Megatron ...

When the conversation arises (as it will) about Boxing Day lunch situation, wonder if instead of it being a problem about YOU (i.e all that food prep etc) you could mention how embarrassed and uncomfortable SIL was about the whole situation...

So, you could just smile and smile about all your effort "no, honestly, we would have cooked for ourselves like that, but I did feel for poor old Sandra and how mortified she was at being put in such an embarrassing position. And of course, you did remind me just the day before that there was a vegetarian in the party, so I can't quite understand why the arrangement suddenly changed from coming to lunch to NOT coming for lunch in the space of 24 hours and WHY I WASN'T informed as to this change. Pray tell, MIL dear?"

And WAIT for her answer and then get on t'interweb and tell us.

NonnoMum · 27/12/2011 21:27

i.e don't just say "it's fine" as nothing will change. Wait for her answer.

BlatherskitesInFairyLights · 27/12/2011 21:34

I wish MIL had told me earlier that Christmas dinner was going to be at 4.30pm! 2 year old DD was so tired by the time it arrived, having missed her nap because she was waiting for lunch and too excited from running round with her cousins, that she ate nothing. There were no snacks in the house either and if I'd have known, I'd have gotten her a sandwich or something earlier.

Not the end of the world for one day but MIL wanted us there fr Boxing day too and that lunch was late too and DD fell asleep at the table.

It was lovely to be invited and the children had a wonderful time with their Gps, Aunties, Uncles and cousins but I was glad to be home today.

NonnoMum · 27/12/2011 21:42

OK. ladies. Can I share my experience of Christmas with toddlers?

All this lovely Christmas malarkey DOES NOT SUIT SMALL CHILDREN. At some point during the day, they will have a meltdown. Big meals, different timings, strange food etc along with excitement, presents, cousins and kissing aunties etc DOES NOT SUIT CHILDREN.

We have had a fairly lovely Christmas and Boxing Day, but I've no idea what mine ate. Today, they all had spagetti bol for their tea and wolfed it down as they have not eaten properly for 3 days. But they had eaten different combinations of satsumas, chocs, melon, king prawns, the odd pig in a blanket, various puddings and who knows what from the cold buffet on Boxing Day.

Last year I gave them chicken nuggets and chips at midday before we went out for our (v v delicious) Christmas lunch (of ham and turkey and beef etc) at about 3 or 4. No one needs to know (unless of course you are actually staying in the house where it's being served up, then I suggest secret carby snacks...

Just remember that Christmas is not about the children when it comes to mealtimes. Otherwise we'd all be eating alphabetti spaghetti at 11.45am.

CardyMow · 27/12/2011 23:50

No, no, no, no, no! The answer is to tell ALL your rellies that they are welcome at yours - if they accept that Christmas dinner will be served at 5.30pm (Too early for my Mother and Stepdad, and too late for Ex-MIL and Ex-FIL!), the food will be what WE want to eat, cooked the way WE want to eat it, and if you don't like it - don't come. So they don't. And I get a luvverly, peaceful IL and P free Christmas every year.

I found some bollocks after a particularly gruesome year where we ended up cooking TWO christmas dinners - which my Ex-P, I and the DC were expected to eat both of (ON THE SAME DAY!). One at 12pm for my Ex-IL's, and one at 9pm for MY parents. Xmas Angry. It turned into a farce of epic proportions that involved a LOT of shouting and alcohol. That was 9 years ago now - and ever since, it's been my way or don't come!!

You all need to grow some balls and just TELL your IL's that you will be doing Christmas in your own home with your partner and dc's. Your way. And if they don't like it, then they shouldn't come.

The only thing that marred my Christmas this year was falling down the stairs while totally sober (still BF). And cracking my rib. I'm a clumsy oaf that needs a new stair carpet.

MrsJangleBalls · 28/12/2011 00:02

Flubba I've got to ask cos I'm pedantic like that, but when you say you rinsed it before you cooked it, do you mean you boiled it, put it in fresh water and then boiled it again before you browned it off in the oven? Cos if you only rinsed it, that fucker would have been as salty as hell!

(dons hard hat)

Megatron please let us know what happened!

moondog · 28/12/2011 00:13

Answer the question damnit, Flubba! Grin

Moominsarescary · 28/12/2011 01:16

I like huntys answer to Christmas dinner

MrsMuddyPuddles · 28/12/2011 01:27

JeniferEight a very nice set of kitchen toys that I've been lusting after for about two years now but couldn't bring myself to buy because about half of it would be duplicates and we have a kitchen the size of a postage stamp apparently, he was embarrassed because his phone cost many times what he bought me (like that matters ).

thimbinapudding, I know well that bs "you're responsible for my unhappiness because you've called me on behaving badly " thing. Hope you can exchange the granny scarf.

(Of course, i'm now Xmas Blush about all the times i've failed to accept a gift graciously, and will be trying to do better in the future because now I know how much it hurts.)

Megatron · 28/12/2011 08:51

Well I haven't phoned! High 5's self

I may have caved and phoned today because I was fretting about it last night, God knows why, but she sent a text to DH at half seven this morning asking when 'Megatron decides to climb down from her high horse perhaps she could bring the children round'. We actually couldn't stop laughing when we read it because it is so unbelieveable. DH ignored it. I will NOT be ringing her and I will NOT be taking DCs round until she gets in touch with me and apologises properly. I hope that doesn't make me sound childish, does it?

I've always thought life is just too short for silly rifts in families but this is not just about bloody lunch. I really did think about some of the posts yesterday about allowing myself to be treated like a mug by her and I just don't want it to carry on anymore. I wouldn't allow it with anyone else but for some reason I've always made excuses for her. She thinks I'm weak because I have been weak as far as she's concerned. DH is fully supportive which makes a big difference and SIL rang yesterday and agrees that I should let her make the first move. I feel OK about it today, not really angry or anything, just sure that things will not continue this way. (oooo get me being all strong!) Grin

StealthPolarBear · 28/12/2011 08:55

Say you'l bring the children round at 12 for lunch...

Original poster
Flubba · 28/12/2011 08:59

MrsJangle and Moondog I did indeed boil the fucker, then tipped out that salty water, rinsed it and then boiled the fucker again before putting it in the oven with a yummy (and might I add not salty) glaze.

:)

OP posts:
BlatherskitesInFairyLights · 28/12/2011 09:03

NonnoMum You are right. DH and I have decided that next year we're going to stay home on our own for Christmas. DCs will be 5 and 3 so still quite small and this way, we can have Christmas lunch at 12, cooked just the way we like it - which will hopefully induce the children to eat a bit more.

I'm actually looking forward to it already :)

Thumbinnapuddingwitch · 28/12/2011 09:03

Yay Megatron! good for you (hi-fives back again) Cheeky bitch - sorry, she is! - how dare she blame this on you! Very glad your DH is being supportive, and your SIL for that matter. I wouldn't just let her make the first move, I would actively insist that she accepts the responsibility for the fuck-up - I doubt you'll get an actual apology, but don't you DARE back down and let it be ok.
Keep going with the Strong attitude Xmas Grin

Original poster
Flubba · 28/12/2011 09:06

Oh well done megatron for holding your own (as it were!). Leave her to stew in her own ungrateful filth, and a Merry Christmas to you, one and (almost) all! :)

OP posts:
purpleknittingmum · 28/12/2011 09:06

Yay Megatron for not phoning! What a nasty thing to say 'when she gets off her high horse......!'

Mulledbee · 28/12/2011 09:06

Absolutely not childish Megatron, I think it's time you had a new start! I'm glad your husband is on board too. Go you! (waves pom-poms)

As an aside why does she think you are on a 'high horse' (a completely ridiculous phrase) when she was disrespectful to both you and your husband surely?

Megatron · 28/12/2011 09:09

DH says she will absolutely know that she is wrong but CANNOT apologise for anything. He says she's never apologised to him in his whole life, even when she knows she's wrong, she likes to just brush over it. I'll let you all know what happens!

purpleknittingmum · 28/12/2011 09:12

Joins in with Mulledbee with shaking pom-poms!! :o

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