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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that kids should be able to manage without gadgets during Christmas lunch?

99 replies

nicknamealreadyinuse · 26/12/2011 09:24

We went to a nice restaurant for lunch yesterday but....judginess warning...most of the kids in there were glued to a gadget during the meal. Not toddlers they were all about six or older I think. Some teens. Surely they can manage to talk to their family on Xmas day? I wouldn't care on a normal day but think Xmas lunch is a time for family.

OP posts:
TheAnnoyingSatsuma · 26/12/2011 09:30

YANBU
And they should be able to sit through a church service without gadgets too

worldgonecrazy · 26/12/2011 09:30

YANBU.

I don't know why it happens? Are parents taking the easy option out and giving these to their children so that they don't have to occupy them or teach them how to behave/have a conversation over dinner? I find it very sad.

Robinredboobs · 26/12/2011 09:32

Don't blame them really..my family never dragged me out to be served up dinner in a restaurant when I was that age. I imagine I'd be bored too. Having strangers cook my Xmas meal is about as far from family orientated as I can think of :)

Omgomgomgomg · 26/12/2011 09:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LineRunner · 26/12/2011 09:36

Ooooh, controversial, Robinredboobs!

WynkenBlynkenandNod · 26/12/2011 09:36

We went out for lunch yesterday and DS ended up reading a book and using an iPod for a bit. He is 8 and wasn't feeling great. He played charades, pulled crackers and chatted enthusiastically for well over an hour but then his stomach hurt and neither DH or I felt like losing sleep over him doing his own thing for a bit whilst we were eating .

DD is nearly 13 and was feeling fine so talked to us the whole way through as I would expect her to.

lollilou · 26/12/2011 09:40

YANBU We attempted a no Tech day yesterday. Didn't do too badly.Although Ds got a new game so he was allowed half an hour.I wouldn't let them use it during a any meal, Christmas or other it's much nicer to enjoying eating,drinking and talking.

sitandnatter · 26/12/2011 09:41

It was Christmas Day, why give your children presents then tell them they can't play with them because you want to go to a restaurant. Christmas for me is about the children and if the adults want to make arrangements that will bore them, they should make allowances for that. If that means they can play with their gadgets then fair enough IMO.

Omgomgomgomg · 26/12/2011 09:41

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WynkenBlynkenandNod · 26/12/2011 09:42

And the reason we took something with us in first place is Mum was very kindly paying to give me a break from cooking after a rubbish year. We always went out when I was little and I hated Christmas lunch in a restaurant and knew that DS being under the weather was likely to create problems. So rather than ruin it for Mum (who eats incredibly slowly) with us telling him off, it was easier to have things with us in case.

VikingWenceslas · 26/12/2011 09:44

I remember being so so bored during meals as a kid. I never kicked up a fuss, but the memories aren't positive, I would have loved a gadget to keep me occupied.

Sirzy · 26/12/2011 09:45

You can give you children presents and tell them they can't play with them. Nothing wrong with having rules in place.

Ds is 2 and was told yesterday he couldn't bring his toys to the table when we were eating. He played with them before and after. If we go out for a meal I take colouring books etc to do with him but they go away as soon as the food arrives. That rule wont change as he gets older and electronic devices will never be allowed that the table

sitandnatter · 26/12/2011 09:48

Sirzy what is the difference between a colouring book at a dinner table and an electronic device. Either way the child is playing? Xmas Confused

Omgomgomgomg · 26/12/2011 09:49

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Sirzy · 26/12/2011 09:51

The level of interaction for a start. We colour together and he is still part of what is going on. Things like Nintendo Ds rarely allow for that.

With a young child it is also harder to keep them engaged in conversation, by teen years they shouldn't need anything to keep them occupied and should be able to converse with family

BoxingBiddy · 26/12/2011 09:53

Depends. My 3 yr old will sit happily through a meal with adults in a restaurant. My 6 yr old couldnt last 10 mins, so we do usually pack books or his DS. Cant comment on church, as we dont go.

Seona1973 · 26/12/2011 09:54

we quite often let the kids take their nintendos when we go out for lunch/dinner as it keeps them occupied while waiting for food. They are put away when the food ariives

Seona1973 · 26/12/2011 09:55

p.s. playing a ds doesnt stop ds talking constantly (unfortunately!)

sitandnatter · 26/12/2011 09:57

I agree OMG I'd have to make the rules consider everyone at the dinner table including the children. Playing with a gadget is hardly disrupting the other diners unless they are little judgy.

Omgomgomgomg · 26/12/2011 09:57

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exoticfruits · 26/12/2011 09:58

YANBU. They could try talking to them! I don't even see why you need it while waiting for the food. We went out one evening last week for a meal and there were a family of 5 on the next table. The DS was about 10yrs and he had sisters of about 8 and 5yrs and they were a delight, they just sat and talked quietly as a family and got a lot of attention from the waiters who obviously appreciated it. DCs will get bored if they are not included in the conversation.

mrswoodentop · 26/12/2011 09:58

Sirzy that is exactly what I would have said when my oldest was 2.At the risk of sounding patronising I willbe interested in what you will say at 7.None of my boys would have been occupied for long with colouring or drawing in those circumstances (i.e. if they had just received a gadget for Xmas)Ds (9) had a gadget free day yesterday and sat up for a 3 hour lunch period ,he did Lego most of the day.

BaroqueAroundTheClock · 26/12/2011 10:01

My boys were gadget free at the table yesterday.................but DS2 played with is DSi all the way through the service yesterday morning - oops.

sitandnatter · 26/12/2011 10:01

Meant to add it should go without saying that when the meals arrive the gadgets go down as they can't use cutlery and gadgets simultaneously so no shocker there really either.

I can't see how adults engaging with children colouring is helping the conversation flow between the adults. That just takes another adult out of the adult conversation. It doesn't matter, hardly a big deal, but seems even more rude to me towards the other adults if the parent colours with the child and ignores them.

People should just be less judgy and accept other parents do what works for them. Colouring or gadgets I mean who really cares?

Omgomgomgomg · 26/12/2011 10:02

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