...to expect thank you cards?

[greenmoo]

Just been wrapping presents for all the children in DP's extended family and whilst I was doing it I couldn't help but be a bit resentful that I won't get any recognition for the effort - every year we give these kids presents and every year we never hear anything back from them: not a thank you card, not a phone call, nothing. When I was a kid after Christmas my mum made me sit and write a card to everybody who'd given me a present. At the minute I send cards on behalf of my DS coz he's only 3 but when he's older I'll do the same. I think it's not only a nice thing to do, it's polite and gracious.

Am I being a right old Scrooge? After all, kids love presents, we're bringing them joy and all that, right? Except I'm left with no idea whether or not the kids even play with these things.

Also, as for many people at the minute, money is tight in our house and Christmas is an expense we could do without. That adds to my resentment at the lack of appreciation.

Actually, i agree about cards, cos i think they are also designed to show how well little so and so is able ot write, but I do think half the joy of giving is hsaring with the recipient their pleaseure in the gift, so a phone call or even
a text is enough, but I really think seomething should be communicated.

YANBU. We always sent thank you letters for our DD when she was little and now she is older she sends her own. I don't mind not receiving a card, but I do think that people ought to send a "thank you' of some kind, whether it's an email or a phone call. It does upset me that you can go to the effort of buying someone a present and they don't even acknowledge it. It seems to happen quite a lot, however - and not just children but adults too.

Also, if you do not reimnd shidlren to think of the sender adn ap[preciate that they have taken time and trouble to ge tthem something, what sort of message are you sending tyo yor child? that is is OK to take and not bother thanking cos you don't need to thank cos the giver should not give just to get thanks? we shuold all be capable of empathy and understnading that if we ar given something, be it help or an item, we shuld acknowledge it and not appear to take it as of right. Good manners are desinged to make all around you feel at ease and to oil the wheels of social ties etc, this may mean doing something you feel pointless, but then, that's life!