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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wonder if its fair that some forces children get fees paid at private schools?

290 replies

scruffybird · 04/12/2011 16:47

A few old friends of mine have their children at good private boarding schools due to ninety percent of the fees being paid for by the forces. I am perfectly aware that I may be being unreasonable for even questioning this, but it just seems wrong?
One of the girls has gone to a school hundreds of miles away from where her family live so that she would be eligible.

OP posts:
nikon1968 · 04/12/2011 18:38

All this has been done time and time again on MN.

If you would rather be with your husband than your children what do I care.

itsbrandybutterandtinseltime · 04/12/2011 18:38

jules this is where I wish MN had 'like' button for comments Smile

RockStockAndTwoOpenBottles · 04/12/2011 18:42

reelingintheyears Sun 04-Dec-11 17:45:24
I went to five different schools at primary before going to boarding school at secondary because my Dad was in the forces.

I could wind you up more by telling you we got free flights at every school holiday to Brunei,Hong Kong and Germany and we had considerably longer holidays than state schools.

Those were the days.

^^ Yep, me too and I'll throw in the flights to the US, Saudi, Cyprus and Australia too Grin

Meglet · 04/12/2011 18:43

yabu.

BearSkinWooliesTwinklyBaubles · 04/12/2011 18:43

If you genuinely do not care Nikon, then why post?

Itsallgonetitsup · 04/12/2011 18:45

de ja vu!!

LineRunnerCrouchingReindeer · 04/12/2011 18:46

I think the rules have probably been tightened because of the obvious abuse by officers' 'ladies' (i.e. wives) like my SiL to the detriment of everyone else.

Strangely she's just enrolled herself on a university course that requires very occasional 'overnighters.' I guess that either it's so that she can keep the kids in boarding school; or it's so that she gets some other allowance. She already has a degree so there's no need for this at all. But she sets great store by her DCs having a private boarding education and 'going places.'

She is a disgrace and her big gob and massive snobbery means that so many people in her wide circle do not understand about the common sense of the CEA.

GingerWrath · 04/12/2011 18:47

My father was in the US Forces and this wasn't an option for me. I went to 13 different schools and did no where near as well as I could have.

The fact that this is available will mean my child will now not have to go through all the upheaval and will be able to make friends that will last a lifetime. I was never in one place long enough.

A friend of mine who did board still regularly meets up with friends she made and she is 40.

skrumle · 04/12/2011 18:50

my only experience of people who have been offered this for the children has been where the family have owned a home locally and the mother has been in full time employment locally but the children have then been sent away to private boarding school - i'm afraid in those circumstances i don't understand the reason behind it being offered...

Original poster
scruffybird · 04/12/2011 18:55

Skrumie I don't think you get offered it, I think you apply. The family I know do not own their own home and she doesn't work.

OP posts:
reelingintheyears · 04/12/2011 18:56

RockStockAndTwoOpenBottles

It was fab back then cos we got to stop off at loads of different countries for re fueling.
Us kids were very competetive about how many countries we'd landed in and were you got to go into the terminal at them.
I was always jealous of the passengers who got to stay on and go to Australia.

goinggetstough · 04/12/2011 18:58

skrumie the people you describe are claiming CEA illegally. CEA is awarded for continuity of education and a mobility certificate is required. This states that the family is mobile and lives with the military spouse. There are a few situations where it can be claimed and the spouse not move e.g. when the military spouse is in an unaccompanied posting and the family is not allowed to move. This used to be the case too if the military spouse was posted to London. This has now been stopped although those in mid tour have been allowed to continue to the end of their tour.
If it is claimed illegally it is fraud and once found out they will be prosecuted as has happened recently.

orienteerer · 04/12/2011 18:59

YABVU

Get0rf · 04/12/2011 19:00

I hate the rampant forces hatred and ignorance on MN.

God boarding school and flights to brunei etc on military planes sounds FANTASTIC.

nikon1968 · 04/12/2011 19:00

I post because I can.

orienteerer · 04/12/2011 19:08

scruffybird - If you are going to get on your 'soap box' why narrow it down to our Forces families, have you forgotten all our FCO civil servants around the globe who are also paid a boarding school allowance. If you & your DH (& family) ware 'sent'/'posted' to a ........'stan' country would you not be glad your govt was happy to ensure at least your children didn't have to endure education in said country? (I'm ex Forces by the way, have never been in FCO but seemed like a good example)Xmas Grin.

BearSkinWooliesTwinklyBaubles · 04/12/2011 19:09

Xmas Biscuit Nikon - for being fixated (to the point of obstinancy) on a military wife 'choosing her dp over her dcs'.

Are there any info/viewpoints that would help you see this from a different perspective, or are you determined to believe that?

RockStockAndTwoOpenBottles · 04/12/2011 19:15

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet.

nikon1968 · 04/12/2011 19:15

No nothing anyone could say would change my mind.

GingerWrath · 04/12/2011 19:24

Ignorance is bliss! Reeling I couldn't agree more. There is so much prejudice towards the Forces in this country. Instead of asking questions to try and find out what it's like, people are just happy to trot out the same old bollocks untruths about service personnel and their families.

Maybe we should be locked away for the sake of society seeing all our soldiers/sailors/airmen are obviously blood thirsty killers that are allowed to breed willy nilly and are given free 5 star accommodation, pay no income tax, national insurance, utilities or council tax. They get free foreign travel every year and contribute nothing, bunch of bloody wasters.

BearSkinWooliesTwinklyBaubles · 04/12/2011 19:24

Didn't think so, somehow. Grin

DownbytheRiverside · 04/12/2011 19:25

'Has anybody mentioned the fantastic perk of having (shitty) married quarters to live in? How dreadful is that?'

It scars you, the limited paint choices, the ban on customising anything or putting nails in walls. I thought everyone lived in rooms that were light blue, pale yellow or white.

And being marched out, the sheer stress of having everything buffed and cleaned and as new.

LineRunnerCrouchingReindeer · 04/12/2011 19:26

So what are the rules, then?

My SiL, who has no job, chooses to follow her military husband to Germany, and leave the Winchester home and put the DCs into boarding school in Hants. The family gets CEA.

A woman who chooses to stay with her DCs in the family home in Winchester, doesn't get CEA?

Is that right?

RockStockAndTwoOpenBottles · 04/12/2011 19:27

DownbytheRiverside don't forget the vile dining tables, chairs, sofas and drafty windows. Indentikit houses whatever country we lived in.

nikon1968 · 04/12/2011 19:28

But you dont have to live in married quarters buy a house.

I have a lady living next door to me she has a baby and her dh is in Afghanistan

A work colleague lives in her own home and her dh is in Portugal [i think] and the kids go to the local school.

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