Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think these people were selfish and rude.

415 replies

cakeoclock · 28/11/2011 14:50

The push chair v wheelchair on a bus just reminded me what happened this weekend.

I was christmas shopping with friends (one in a wheelchair) in Harvey Nicks Leeds and it was pretty busy. We stood waiting for the lift, the doors opened and it was rammed full of people (no push chairs). Not one of the miserable gits got out to make space for the wheelchair just looked away until the doors shut and we had to wait ages for another lift. There were escalators less than a minute walk from the lift.

AIBU to think that this is lazy, selfish and awful and to hope if any of you are reading you feel ashamed.

OP posts:
ChickensThinkYouCanGetStuffed · 28/11/2011 14:52

YANBU. DH has a cousin in a wheelchair. He'd have probably rammed the lift Grin

Clarabumps · 28/11/2011 14:53

This is despicable. My SIL has severe MS and is in a wheelchair and this happens quite a lot when we're out shopping..especially at Christmas. It seems to bring out the worst in people. They all just stare at each other as if"are you not going to get off?" until the doors shut and then its "oh well"
Fuckers!

Clarabumps · 28/11/2011 14:53

SIL jokes about getting a cattle prod stuck to the front of her chair.

blueballoon79 · 28/11/2011 14:53

YANBU. But this doesn't surprise me! My son is in a wheelchair and I'm often shocked by how ignorant some people can be. Just yesterday, I was coming out of a restaurant with DS in his wheelchair and DD on his knee. There are 3 steps to get down and just as I was about to get his wheelchair off the last step and onto the pavement, a group of four people slowly sauntered past leaving me holding onto the wheelchair with both childrens combined weight until they had got by so I could then get the chair onto the pavement. I was fuming!

Original poster
cakeoclock · 28/11/2011 14:54

I couldn't believe it! Unfortunately, my friend said it happens a lot and that it is nothing compared to other stuff she has to face!

OP posts:
OldLadyKnowsNothing · 28/11/2011 14:55

Why should a wheelchair user get priority in that situation? Is his/her time more valuable? Would your entire party have expected to get in the lift, or would your wheelchair-bound friend have had to wait for you on whatever other floor you were heading for?

I can see that a wheelchair user should have priority when it comes to buses, because they would otherwise have to wait in the great British weather, but indoors?

StaceymAloneForver · 28/11/2011 14:56

unbelievable, some people are so rude!

DesperatelySeekingPomBears · 28/11/2011 14:56

YABU - waiting for the next lift didn't hurt you or your friend. Presumably you're NOT in a wheelchair. Why did your friend need you to wait with them and presumably take up space in a lift? YOU could also have taken the escalator.

wahwahwah · 28/11/2011 14:57

I remember being 'trapped' in m&s one Christmas because I had taken the pram up to the top floor, did some some shopping then tried to get in the lift to come back down. The lifts were rammed with so many people just getting into any lift then staying on until they eventually got to their destination. I was there for about twenty minutes until I eventually got onto one. It was hideous! Most of the lazy buggers could have walked or taken the escalators!

blueballoon79 · 28/11/2011 14:57

cakeoclock, your friend is right! Things like this happen regularly to me and DS. The worst by far was a woman telling me how good I was to have not put DS into care and to bring him up myself. She meant it in a well intentioned way, but it was very upsetting.

Original poster
cakeoclock · 28/11/2011 14:57

Quite simple really OldLady she can't use the escalators just behind the lift the able bodied lazy bastards could have done! Your name suits your ignorance.

OP posts:
StaceymAloneForver · 28/11/2011 14:57

onlylady really???

when people not in wheelchairs can use an escalator and people in wheelchairs can't??

Really??

ChickensThinkYouCanGetStuffed · 28/11/2011 14:58

DH's cousin went to the cinema once and the usher removed his wheelchair. He transferred from his chair to a cinema seat, and the usher came over and started wheeling off his chair. He asked wtf he thought he was doing, and the usher said it was 'a fire hazard'. The cousin then explained clearly and in words of one syllable that not being able to walk and having some bastard nick your wheelchair was a much bigger hazard should a fire break out. He is magnificent in full flow, DH's cousin

OldLadyKnowsNothing · 28/11/2011 14:58

YOU could have used the escalators too. Why didn't you?

Original poster
cakeoclock · 28/11/2011 14:58

I was pushing the wheelchair! The rest of the group used the escalators!

OP posts:
grovel · 28/11/2011 14:59

What do you expect in Leeds?

StaceymAloneForver · 28/11/2011 15:00

^ old not only was so indignant i got it wrong Blush

WilsonFrickett · 28/11/2011 15:00

Gah! People who are perfectly able to use stairs or escalators drives my DH insane to the point that, as we were leaving hospital with DS (after an C section) when I turned towards the lifts he gave me a hard stare and suggested we take the stairs! Smile

YANBU

Original poster
cakeoclock · 28/11/2011 15:01

blue balloon that is awful! My friends mother was told by a nurse that she must have done something very bad in a previous life!

OP posts:
SenoritaViva · 28/11/2011 15:03

People just don't think.

I find it utterly horrendous that people can be so ungenerous towards those with disabilities, it makes me sick. That said (and I am not excusing the people on Saturday) I often think able bodied people just don't connect the dots of what might help. It would have only taken one bright spark in that lift to have understood what needed to be done and I suspect it would have been like dominos (or at least I hope so).

Don't know why I sound like I am defending them, I'm saddened by all this and silently think that every child as part of their school education should get involved with people with disabilities so that they can be a bit more thoughtful (I assisted with a RDA camp once per year from 11 - 15 for instance). But that's for another discussion (is that big society speak?)

YULEingFanjo · 28/11/2011 15:04

YABU. Why should someone get out of a lift to let someone in if they need that lift too?
I could understand if you were pissed off that people had barged infront of you but expecting people already on their journey up or down to get out is just too much.

tigermoll · 28/11/2011 15:05

This is a little offtopic, but just wanted to (finally) know:

I have always made an effort to describe someone as 'using a wheelchair' rather than being 'in a wheelchair'. But I see some posters on here (who have close family/friends who are wheelchair users) have said 'in a WC'.

SO is it OK of me to say 'in a wheelchair'? No one has ever said that I shouldn't, but I didn't know if it was a bit, you know, not ok.

Original poster
cakeoclock · 28/11/2011 15:05

I would like to think that they hadn't realized but their nervous shuffles and practically willing the doors to shut while looking anywhere but towards us gave them away!

OP posts:
Original poster
cakeoclock · 28/11/2011 15:08

But YULE they didn't NEED the lift, they could use the escalators my friend had no other option but use the lift.

I take it you wouldn't get out then.

Tigrmoll I'm no expert but my friend describes herself as "in a wheelchair"

OP posts:
Davsmum · 28/11/2011 15:09

There was NO room in the lift. You have to wait your turn like everyone else.
Once people are in a lift - I doubt they would think to get out for soemone else to get in - even if that person is in a wheelchair !