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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to ignore my DH's wish for a freezer list?

138 replies

wisebird · 21/11/2011 07:57

My DH, unusually, had an hour or two off from his 24/7 job yesterday and spent it alphabetising the spice cupboard and listing all the items in our freezer - by shelf, quantity and number. He wants me to add/subtract to the freezer list every time I put something in or take something out. I am already in trouble this morning for taking out 3 bread rolls and 2 chicken breasts without updating the list. He claims the freezer list will make life easier for me. Now, I have a pretty good idea what is in the freezer as I do all the shopping and cooking (I am a SAHM), and tbh don't want to mess around with a list when I can remember what is in the freezer or, worst case scenario, open the door and look. I told DH this and he then said it would make it easier for him when he wants to cook if he can see at a glance what we have. As background info, due to his extreme job, he cooks a meal (well, a course) maximum about once every 2 or 3 months.

So AIBU to not want to have an extra chore that does not help me in order that 4 or 5 times a year DH is saved the trouble of OPENING the door of the freezer and fridge and looking inside it?

I am worried about mission creep and lists being applied to the fridge and the veg trays next . So AIBU or should I humour him for a week or two on the basis that he pays for everything?

OP posts:

justpaddling · 21/11/2011 19:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

iFailedTheTuringTest · 21/11/2011 19:47

Iguana - and r.f.I.d. tags on all stock, and a reader in the fridge, freezer and cupboards. that way you could control stock, automatically re order, and calculate volume of waste disposed each week. While mning in the kitchen of course.

CaroleService · 21/11/2011 20:10

If you emptied the freezer, and just stuck his body in it, the list would be ever so easy

carabos · 21/11/2011 20:37

BIL and SIL used to keep a notebook in which they kept records of spending, itemised by person e.g. BIL, mars bar, 50p; SIL, newspaper, 70p. I imagine this is now on a spreadsheet somewhere as they are both obsessive list keepers very well organised.

clam · 21/11/2011 20:46

Sarahstratton nothing wrong with tupperware cupboards, per se. It's just that the world seems to be divided into those of us who organise them with military precision, as opposed to those of us who throw random containers minus matching lids in and slam the door quick before they all fall out. You'd be depressed surprised to know how many ways there are of organising them efficiently.

virgiltracey · 21/11/2011 20:50

I love my freezer list. Its writen using a whiteboard marker on the top of the freezer itself.

DH ignores it completely though - which means he's the one who has to go to the shop when we're unexpectedly out of milk because he's forgotten to update the list!

mrsjay · 21/11/2011 20:53

oh i thought my Dh monthly menu was bad now dont get me wrong meal planning is great but he has a hissy if i dare stray of it and have something else , I think the OP hubby is a bit OCD about a freezer and id tell him if he is so worried about the list he can take all frozen food out and put it up .... his list

JellicleCat · 22/11/2011 00:52

Are you secretly married to my husband? He has just decided we need one of these lists. I know it will fizzle out, so I have half-heartedly started the list. 2 weeks later, list is still only half done. Maybe your DH will forget about it after a while and you can quietly abandon it like what I plan to do. Though my husband does cook about half the time.

squeakytoy · 22/11/2011 01:20

I am so so so glad my husband is scared of my our kitchen.

If he ever decided to look through the cupboards, fridge, freezer, he would see I didnt really "need" to go shopping for at least a year!

As it is, when I say we have nothing in... he believes me!

My MIL bought me a fantastic set of pans a few months ago... he only noticed those last week...

MilkNoSugarPlease · 22/11/2011 07:45

Umm, doesn't everyone alphabetise their spice rack?!

Whateveryousaymustberight · 22/11/2011 08:16

I often notice retired couples bickering in the supermarket. It always seems to be because the woman is having her grocery shopping technique questioned by the man. Seems like something she's been doing for years and years is the focus for the guy's strategising, streamlining and stuff. Take a look next time you shop. I guarantee you'll see it. I dread Mr Whatever retiring and applying all his business knowledge to my trolley. Ooh...unless...I'm thinking that the men can grocery away to their alphabetised hearts' content, while the women scoff tea and cakes in a nice little teashop. We may not shop correctly, but most of my women friends really can cafe to perfection, n'est pas?

virgiltracey · 22/11/2011 08:37

does nobody else have a freezer list?

In fact hang on I know that can't be right since I got the idea from MN!!!

TheSkiingGardener · 22/11/2011 08:51

I think we should build a supermarket just for these people. Each and every product will be in alphabetical order. It will involve many tiny fridges and freezers but OP's DH and others like him would be very, very happy.

Acanthus · 22/11/2011 09:10

Surely the flaw in his cunning plan is going to be his inevitable inability to find anything even if the list on the front were ever updated says it is in there. Everyone knows men can never find anythingand you'll ave to get it out yourself. So what's the point of the bloody list!

Seriously, if he isn't normally an arse, I would wonder about stress at work too.

LiviaAugusta · 22/11/2011 09:18

If I ever have to send DH to the supermarket without me I have to write the shopping list in the order he'll find things when he walks round the shop so he doesn't get too confused (and come back with a lot of un-needed random crap). We do have a sort of freezer stock control system which was instigated by DH after DS was born and he did more cooking. I'd made loads of bolognese sauce, curries etc in preparation and because DH couldn't identify them by sight he bought bags and a marker pen to make sure I labelled and dated everything I put in. After I stopped calling him a control freak it did make sense, but if he started asking me to run a comprehensive freezer list I'd a) tell him where to stick it after I stopped laughing at him, and b) wonder what was going on to trigger this need to have some control over something in his life.

Flisspaps · 22/11/2011 09:26

Nagoo If DH banks with Lloyds TSB, their online banking service automatically produces a pie chart

We have a blackboard painted on the kitchen wall and take a photo of the list when we go shopping. That's the plan anyway. What usually happens is DH buggers off to the supermarket without the list and I end up having to send the list to him when he's standing in the middle of ASDA without a clue what we need.

boschy · 22/11/2011 09:29

I am loving this!! especially alphabetising the spice rack...
Must not let DH see any of this, it'd be right up his street :o

BendyBob · 22/11/2011 09:29

I am torn here.

Whilst I agree that an interferring other half poking about in the kitchen and stock controlling the freezer to within an inch is probably going to be grounds for divorce (I go nuts when dh trunkies in and starts meddling in my kitchen drawers, ooeer missus) I am also a sucker for a lovely list.

Ooh how I like a nice list! There surely must be a 'condition' with a long unpronouncable name that describes people that like to make lists.

I'd def tell dh to poke it if he tried that on. But I'd secretly be doing a Homer style Doh! that I hadn't devised it myself

WorkingItOutAsIGo · 22/11/2011 09:47

I love lists . I even write things on my to do list after I have done them so I can have the pleasure of crossing them off. I have lists of what's in my freezer, my Ocado shopping (linked to my menu planner so rotating through four weeks of Monday and Friday deliveries), what we need to do this week, this month, this quarter, this year, this next 5 years and the children's priorities for the term. And that's just for starters. There's nothing that can't be made better with a list in my book!

My name is WorkingItOutAsIGo and I am a list-oholic.

pissedrightoff · 22/11/2011 09:55

I am a bit worried about this tea-towel coaching and spot checks, Fucking spot checks????

Are you in the military?

Your comment about letting him have his way as he pays for everything concerns me also.

Are there other things like this going on/went on in the past?

startail · 22/11/2011 09:58

Freezers are a magical mystery tour, you're not supposed to know what's in the next draw.

supadupapupascupa · 22/11/2011 10:00

I do both the spice rack and the freezer list. The spices need to be in order otherwise i would never find what i need and use every other day i reckon. I only do the freezer list when we are short of money. It is amazing how many meals are lurking in there and really helps to have a good clear out once in a while.
DH is trying to convince me to write all my spends down to save a bit more. We have a spreadsheet but have categories such as shopping and personal spends which we always overspend on and have no idea why......he has a point, but i am too lazy i think.....and i'm an accountant!!

supadupapupascupa · 22/11/2011 10:01

oh god i also have a rolling 4 week menu planner....

i have been on MN too long.....

canyou · 22/11/2011 10:03

I love lists and yes I have a contents list for my kitchen freezer, my deep freeze, my store cupboard and my baking cupboard and yes if you remove and use something it must be noted on the list
In my defence I started it when money got tight and we started planning meals etc to reduce waste/costs and have almost halved the shopping bill and food no longer gets thrown out because it went out of date or got thrown to the back of the freezer and burned by the icy conditions

MinnieBloodBar · 22/11/2011 10:12

I have a freezer list .

At the moment it's a scrappy piece of paper on the inside of the cupboard larder door that looks like this;
mince x3 x2 1
veg pasta veg pasta x3 x2
scampi scampi scampi
etc.

You get the idea. I was planning on painting a small canvas with blackboard paint and hanging it on the inside of the door to avoid the crossing-out mess

It works for me, as it helps me to realise when I need to cook more for the DCs as they often have hot packed lunches for school, but it is my system and I chose it.

Tupperware drawer, however, is a disgrace. There are definitely lids without matching pots and vice versa, but I can't throw them out because what if the matching part then turns up afterwards? Well?

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