AIBU to ignore my DH's wish for a freezer list?

[wisebird]

My DH, unusually, had an hour or two off from his 24/7 job yesterday and spent it alphabetising the spice cupboard and listing all the items in our freezer - by shelf, quantity and number. He wants me to add/subtract to the freezer list every time I put something in or take something out. I am already in trouble this morning for taking out 3 bread rolls and 2 chicken breasts without updating the list. He claims the freezer list will make life easier for me. Now, I have a pretty good idea what is in the freezer as I do all the shopping and cooking (I am a SAHM), and tbh don't want to mess around with a list when I can remember what is in the freezer or, worst case scenario, open the door and look. I told DH this and he then said it would make it easier for him when he wants to cook if he can see at a glance what we have. As background info, due to his extreme job, he cooks a meal (well, a course) maximum about once every 2 or 3 months.

So AIBU to not want to have an extra chore that does not help me in order that 4 or 5 times a year DH is saved the trouble of OPENING the door of the freezer and fridge and looking inside it?

I am worried about mission creep and lists being applied to the fridge and the veg trays next . So AIBU or should I humour him for a week or two on the basis that he pays for everything?

Why don't you add a few random things to the list then ask him when he took them out. I take no notice of my husband when he starts trying to organise me. He can't find anything unless it is at the front of the cupboard or fridge and he would have no idea where to find anything in the freezer. I think your husband is hilarious, just laugh.

On reflection, DH's heart was in the right place and he was trying to help so I should be more indulgent and respect his feelings (even if I don't agree with having a freezer list). Posters saying it is a cry for help could be right and I will go away and think more about that and what I can do to help. It occurs to me suddenly that this might all be because his parents are staying with us tonight (on their way elsewhere) and perhaps he is trying to impress them.

Last year, it was clear plastic bags inside all our drawers but they have gradually been forgotten about......

The alphabetised herbs and spices are admittedly quite good, actually, although he was thrown by my having the turmeric and cumin seeds out whilst he was doing it (I was cooking a curry) so they have had to go on an upper shelf out of order . We will cope!

lavandes - gaslight him, eh? Good thinking....

I too can testify that a list on the outside of the freezer requiring constant updating doesn't really work.

However in the run up to 'freezer defrosts' I do usually put a list on the door to remind me of what I need to use up. Even the simple act of scoring off the stuff that has been used often defeats me and I like to think I'm fairly organised.

However kitchen cupboard duplication annoys me. We have two opened jars of exactly the same spice in our fridge as the other person in this household didn't check the fridge before they went to the supermarket and a whole heap of other duplicates. As we have a small kitchen I object to having the small amount of storage space rammed full of tins of baked beans and duplicate jars of spices.

I've not worked out how to change this without causing offence so I'm putting up with it and moaning to you lot instead.

My mum does the list-crossy-out thing for her freezer and has the same system in her head for her cupboards. Regardless of the, well, weirdness and control-freakery of it, it means she ends up holding far too much stock (as it were) - she always has x amount of chicken thighs, y amount of pork chops etc, with no relation to what she's actually planning to cook. So I frequently end up pulling tins out of the cupboard with sell-by dates from the last millennium. It sounds very organized but it's poor household management.

he he he he he

it will not work!

hee hee hee

he is a loon who obviously has no idea! perhaps he should take some time off and run the list for a day or two, until it drives him mad.

it also sounds too controlling to me too.

My Dh tried exactly the same thing with the shopping list. I resisted initially, then told him to draw me up a list, then followed it exactly and let him know exactly how inconvenient it was and every time he complained we didn't have something I reminded him it hadn't been on the list. We've gone back to my method again now where if you finish something you write it on the list on the fridge and I buy some more. Amazingly it works.

Basically - go along with it, but let him know if it doesn't work out more efficient. If by some chance it is more efficient then you both kind of win, annoying though it will be!

YANBU, but mainly cos your dh sounds like a controlling arse he's being a bit OTT.

DH and I conducted a joint 'freezer audit' last month. It took 2 hours (we have 3 freezers as I shop and cook in such a way as to be always prepared for a nuclear winter) and was very helpful for about 2 days. By which point I had shopped and cooked some more...but the intention was to get a snapshot view of what we did/nt have, so I could do some rebalancing and using-up where needed, rather than to create some sort of mad controlled system.

Oh, and spices shouldnt be alphabeticised. That's no use at all. You need all your green herbs together, in one area, then cinammon, mixed spice, ginger, cloves etc etc in another, then the more obscure stuff (star anise, fennel seed) that you use less frequently somewhere a bit out of the way. Otherwise you can't just reach and grab in the middle of child-juggling, cooking and listening to radio 4.....

To be honest I find my freezer list VERY useful as I have a habit of bagging random leftovers and bunging them in... and forgetting to label them. But its MY territory, DH knows this and he also knows if he started 'telling' me to adopt certain strategies he'd get more than an icy glare.

If the freezer is 'your' domain, manage it exactly as you please!

Completely agree with Fillybuster regarding herb/spice arrangement.

Though I did build little shelves in my cupboard so I could see all spices/herbs at one glance, that was a little anal I suppose but I use lots of herbs/spices.

What were the plastic bags for OP ?

On the spice question I have mine in tubs in the cupboard - they are organised in "families" - curry spices, thai spices, chinese spices, miscellaneous and cake. Then I just grab the pertinent tub.

I do a freezer audit on Sundays for menu planning purposes so I always know what's in there; in fact I could probably write it from memory right now.

I am very anal about the kitchen storage and am a fanatical listmaker but even I wouldn't have a list of freezer stock - it's never going to be updated.

I am jealous as MIL FIL has a freezer list. However, if DH decided to delight me by creating one for this house I'd tell him to cock off. These things seem like a good idea, but the upkeep is a PITA.

It's like DH setting budgets. I don't need a budget. If the children need clothes then £5 for 3 tops in Tesco does not need budgeting for, we need to buy it. He hasn't got a clue what the housekeeping costs as it all magically happens when he is not looking. So he tries to get me to keep receipts and stuff. I know he's not meaning to judge me, but I don't need to be micro-managed and it makes me want to shove him microsoft money up his bumhole.

Oh Sorry OP, I've been bottling that up.

I think I would spend my morning rearranging the freezer!!

'And just who did you cook that fillet steak for?'

Seems a bit like OCD....

We keep a freezer list because we have three freezers in different parts of the house/garage and it's useful to know what is in which freezer. I cross out or add but every 3 months or so, we have a 'stocktake' and produce a definite up to date list. Your husband is NBU and it takes seconds to delete from or add to a list. What's your problsm?

PS Things in our loft are in numbered boxes and in our study I have a book that lists each box and what's in it. Not only that, I have a loft map of where each box is. It saves time when trying to get something down or put something up into the correct box. The freezer list and loft inventory simply shows organisation.

I alphabetise my DVDs, my books and I date order my magazines. And my airing cupboard is a thing of beauty.

I think it may be quite helpful. I would let him get on with it. I wouldn't mind if my dH made a list in my freezer but he never would.

Nagoo, let it all out love. I used to get the same thing about receipts . I just stood my ground and politely told him no to piss right off

Get him one of these

:)

I disagree with fillybuster about the herb arrangement, if you put all the green herbs together then it's much easier to pick up the sage when you wanted the basil and use it before you realise. If they go red/green/red/green, then there's much less chance of this happening.

And anyway the correct way is a jumbled mess which you have to hunt through to find what you want, as then you go "oh we have Marjoram, I wonder if that'll taste nice in the fruitcake" and get to explore new flavours.

Lizzie, I get "£6 in Asda online.... what was that for?" when he cheks the statements. (2 pairs of school trousers FFS!) it's not that he cares that I have spent the money, it's that he likes to categorise stuff on his pie charts. If it is not on a spreadsheet he doesn't understand it. But it's bloody frustrating.

I know what is in the freezer.

2 packets of mince, chicken thighs, 1 pack bacon, scallops (oooh) mussels, chicken pies x2 meat pies x4 enough chips for 1 dinner, a new packet of roast potatoes some frozen brocolli (I put it in curry) beans and peas, some potato waffles and a packet and a half of fish fingers. And some aged icepoles.

DH must have done the meat pies for tea last night, and I forgot about a gammon joint and a packet of sausages, And the spiderman thing you put on bruises. But I didn't do badly, did I?

*No judging for the Auntie Bessie Factor please :)