to Confront my DD about this Poem?

[scotchpancakes]

Regular poster but created a new account for this because a couple of people know me in RL and I don't want to embarass my DD!

My DD is 15 and apart from the usual teen moodiness seems to be doing fine. Tonight, I find a few poems she's written left out on the kitchen table under her things that need parental signature. I can't help but think it was left for me to find because she's very secretive about her diary etc, keeping everything hidden away. I really don't know whether it's some sort of cry for help or whether I'm reading too much into it and will just bring a hail of "I can't believe you read it! I hate yous!" onto myself.

Some of the poems are more worrying than others but the one below kinda shows most clearly what I would be worried about.

A constant pitter-patter,
A source of gloom
Deep within.

It is entrenched
But softly drowned
Away. Uneasiness quenched.

A piercing bolt
That steadily grab hold,
Brisk with its jolts.

Relief. An encompassing contentment
Rises and sweeps away
Disbelief.

Limping onwards towards
Normality within reach
And soaring above
The shuddering rawnesss.

Truth at last.
Inescapable silence takes sway.

AIBU to confront her? Would you just leave it? I genuinely dont know what to do. Help!

Are you going to have it deleted now?

It's not about how browsing MN, this site is googleable, so if anyone ever googles it this thread will come up.

This poem could have many different interpretations, as we've shown.

It means different things to different people, depending on their experience. That's what makes it good.

She's a poet, and she's playing with ideas, as writers do.

She could be writing from her own, immediate experience, but she could just as easily be writing about something she's read or heard about, or an experience she's imagining.

The only way to find out is to have a conversation with her, but i feel very strongly that it should be a discusion that start with the poem, and its content, rather than an assumption that she is writing from direct experience.

FFS! Just ask her to tell you about the ideas that led to the poem! If you start imagining all sorts of things it will colour your judgement and she'll pick up on it and could clam up and become defensive.

Just have a chat with your (obviously very intelligent and thoughtful) daughter!

Exactly re googling, TeWirah. As I said yesterday I think it's really, really wrong of you to post this poem. But you clearly don't agree. Hope you don't end up regretting this.

That to Op obvs, not to TeWihara!

For fuck's sake.

Is the purpose of AIBU to find the strangest way of twisting a post into something unreasonable possible? Publishing her work without the poet's permission? Jesus. Get a grip folks.

I was a seriously depressed teen. I would have some sort of chat.

So you'd have been happy for your mother to post your inner most thoughts on a public forum? Where strangers can google key words and see your poem?
Not really about getting 'the poet's permission' is it?
Completely missing the point.

It's really quite good.

I wrote much sh1tter dreary poetry when I was a teen.

Actually having my mother give a shit about my feelings enough to ask advice on how to approach them vs respecting my "authorship"? I'd rather have a real life person care enough about me to check out I was okay if I was writing this than worry about some random strangers' thoughts on the quality of my literary effort. It's not a diary entry. Poetry is performance, even at this level. It was left on the table for a reason. Who the hell will google it? Even if they do, they won't know it's her work.

What key words could you google here to find this poem? I have been trying to find lyrics for a song I sang in school for years which I presume must have been published and no sign of it. Bit of a stretch there.

Arrrghhh it's not about respecting 'authorship' or 'poet's permission' or 'copyright'!

It's about respecting your teenager's right to privacy especially over something intensely private.

I've said upthread, OP should talk to DD about the poems.

'What key words could you google'?

Well for a start, I just googled 'Mumsnet/poem' and this thread came up top of the list.

What if the daughter, who is interested in poetry, and has a mum and probably knows her mum's on mumsnet did the same?

On a purely practical note, if she were to enter it into a competition or for an exam, it would probably be run through anti-plagiarism software and would now come up as a 100% match.

There are lots of sites that host teenage poetry. I have some lurking out there. I used to google them every so often if I got a review from somewhere I didn't recognise to check it hadn't been rehosted elsewhere without my permission.

Proudnscary. I wouldn't care if my Mum posted stuff on the internet if no-one knew who she was. Why would I? I don't know them, they don't know who I am. How is any privacy violated?

It's a good poem. I wouldn't think that in itself it should be something to make you worry about your daughter, certainly not something to "confront" her about.

Agree that you should get this thread deleted. Not really fair to publish her poem here.

It's a great poem