to Confront my DD about this Poem?

[scotchpancakes]

Regular poster but created a new account for this because a couple of people know me in RL and I don't want to embarass my DD!

My DD is 15 and apart from the usual teen moodiness seems to be doing fine. Tonight, I find a few poems she's written left out on the kitchen table under her things that need parental signature. I can't help but think it was left for me to find because she's very secretive about her diary etc, keeping everything hidden away. I really don't know whether it's some sort of cry for help or whether I'm reading too much into it and will just bring a hail of "I can't believe you read it! I hate yous!" onto myself.

Some of the poems are more worrying than others but the one below kinda shows most clearly what I would be worried about.

A constant pitter-patter,
A source of gloom
Deep within.

It is entrenched
But softly drowned
Away. Uneasiness quenched.

A piercing bolt
That steadily grab hold,
Brisk with its jolts.

Relief. An encompassing contentment
Rises and sweeps away
Disbelief.

Limping onwards towards
Normality within reach
And soaring above
The shuddering rawnesss.

Truth at last.
Inescapable silence takes sway.

AIBU to confront her? Would you just leave it? I genuinely dont know what to do. Help!

Tis bloody good!

I thought self-harming when I read it to be honest.

I am really uncomfortable that you posted her poem on here. Even though you name changed and it's anonymous. It feels so wrong. I would not have done that myself.

Putting that aside, I would talk to her, yes. It is probably teen angst, but teen angst can tip into something darker and more unmanageable quite easily.

I don't think the content sounds particularly alarming - and it's quite good poetry for a 15 year old IMO, she should enter competitions or something! I probably would have written equally gloomy stuff at that age, though with less literary merit...

But, you have a point that by leaving it there when she's normally so careful and private with her stuff, it does look like she wanted you to find it for some reason. It could be as simple as she wants you to read or give your opinion on her writing, but doesn't want to directly ask! Or it could be something more worrying as people are suggesting. Maybe mention it in a casual way, see how she reacts and take it from there?

I agree it probably wasn't the best idea to post the poem like that, you could have PM'd it to selected people if you felt you needed opinions on the specific text.

You could report your post and see if MNHQ can remove that bit. It would not be good if your daughter came across this thread...

Writing the poetry might be enough of an outlet for her.

Agree with amistillsexy and others - talk to her about what a good poem it is. Don't mention you are worried about her. IMO it is normal for a teenager to write this type of thing.

I thought of reporting it, Ephiny, but you're right it's up to OP.
OP - if she comes across this on your laptop she will most likely find it an unforgivable invasion of her privacy.
Even if she doesn't find it still feels like an invasion to me...

ask for it to be put into OTBT

you can't google it there, afaik

Yes - Off into OTBT for this I think. (you're so clever SHJ)

I'm sorry but I think it's about an abortion. In fact I think that's pretty clear. Hopefully it is DD imagining what it would be like to go through one but as she left it where you'd see it I would talk to her. Hope it is just artistic licence.

I'm always telling people to put things in OTBT, Shirl

I'm like a council recycling officer, me

everything in Proper Place please peeps

btw I thought it was about shagging

See? The thing about poetry is that it is meant to be interpreted by the reader.

How amazing that a 15 year old has written a poem that has been interpreted in so many different ways by so many of us!

She has a gift I think.

SHJ - I think everything should be somewhere other than AIBU these days - but that's cos I'm getting jaded

Feel a bit bad for you that you can't just ask your DD about it and had to come on here instead, agree with the posters that say your Dd would be mortified..

I would talk to her - no harm in it. I thought drugs/booze when I read it.

'Pitter patter' is surely a reference to a baby though.

Surely it's about an abortion?

Interesting all the different interpretations. I read self-harm or bulimia myself.

And yes, if your DD ever finds this thread she will disown you!

to me the pitter patter is either the pitter patter of blood, or a reference to rain (and the gloom) linked to depression or feeling down

I'm torn on this one. On one hand it does sound like perfectly normal teenage angst, god knows I used to write poems & the like when I was 15 - all gloomy or potentially "disturbing" IIRC. On the other hand, if you feel that the poetry was left out for you to see then it could be a cry for help which, obviously, you wouldn't want to miss. I'd probably have to mention it but in as casual a way as possible & quietly watch out for other signs of abnormal unhappiness. She probably is fine, it is probably no more than teenage angst but a chat can't hurt IMO.