to find some people attitudes, such as "i work hard i deserve it" really sickening

[carriedababi]

was reading some magazine in the dentist, there was a woman from dragons den iin the mag.
saying how she had a wardrode worth 3 million.

and she went onto say well i work hard for it.
so ideserve it.
and something todo with she sees her expensive clothes as a symbol of how sucessful she is.

really made me feel sick, how a horrible nasty attitude to have in life.

i'm sure even if i was a millionaire, i would not be proud about spending that much on clothes.

i don't know its just the arrogant im entitled to this that got me.
and dont they think people how have less also work hard. probably alot of them work alot harder

what do you think

But poeple really are staying out- social mobilty is IIRC dropping if anything.

I suspect schools are linked in; inequality still exists on a large scale.

I hear you, Peachy.

I'm another one of those who managed to drag themselves beyond what was expected, however.

It's just a shame that whatever I achieve is in spite of, rather than thanks to, my upbringing.

Rose can I ask if you would consider youself MC?

Just if you are it's likely you would mostly meet people who ahd climbed the social ladder no?

Whereas I am comapring the children on an estate I grew up on in the seventies that is (or was, when I moved away) classed as top ten deprivation levels.

I do think you are right,in your earlier post a lot of it is the parents attitude.

All this talk of "not getting above your station" etc.

But it is not impossible to ignore that attituide, and decide that is not the life for you if someone really wants too IYSWIM.

It's not like you are totally immobile

Mum believed we could; she had a solid start but hit a huge trauma and her carewer ended sudenly (4 stillbirths, enough to floor anyone I weould think) but she had hugely aspirational aprents.

Dad had the bigger mountain: 15 / 16 kids in a 3 bed home, Grandad a drunk and Nan disabled so raised by siblings. Passed 11+ but Nan said no to Grammar, they naver left the estate but by 35 Dad managed tha factory his brothers worked in and I have yet to meet anyone who worked the hours he did to make that happen.

But I know from my own life that things can derail whoever you are (I have 3 asd boys and whilst I hope that didn;t stop my career which was quite good it certianly stalled it). Funnily enough Dad gets that more than anyone and is really understanding of people's individual circs, something else I admire him for.

Of course peple aren;t totally immobile generally, though not everyone can move up anyway- society needs a large % to do the lower status work after all. And plenty just are not academic or have poor health etc.

Tut, Im upper class dontcha know!

Seriously I have no idea what class I am...!

Yes I think it would be fair to say I have grown up surrounded by successful and fairly wealthy people though, so yes I probably have seen another side to the story than you have seen.

So this will shape both our perceptions- I see the success you see the people who stayed immobile.

I suppose its is fair to say we both will base things on anteodotal, and nothing wrong with that.

I will add though- part of what I was saying is you no longer have to be academic to become successful.

You can also be creative (actor, artist, graphic designer though of course much rarer)
You can be practical. I know plently of people who are very wealthy from the building trade (plumbers, electritions etc) but only through self employment.

In the past Im not sure this would have been as possible as it is now.

I am the poster guirl for social mobility.

Born and raised on a sink estate. Parents suffered between them alcohol issues and MH problems. No one in my family has ever been educated past 16 either before me or after.

Add to that, I suffer from dyslexia.

I wnet to university, became a lawyer and am now a writer.

But you will never ever catch me saying oh anyone can do it. You will never catch me saying oh a bright child will do well anywhere. Cos many many of my peers were brighter and more talented than me...but they are still on that estate.

I'm the opposite way round form LeQueen, though.

I'm from a solidly middle class background - ponies, large house etc. DH is the product of a psychotic single mother dragged up in poverty, sent to shit schools.

He's the one with the top degree and top job, not me.
So which one of us married well?

The point of social mobilty is though, providing it is not wasted, the money can be used for future generations.

If for example, LeQueen inherits her fathers money she could use the money too fund university fee's and help her children onto the property ladder. In turn if her children don't waste it they can do the same for their children and so on.

That could possibly be generations in that family that have become socially mobile- so yes they will be lucky to be born into that.

I do work v hard and yes I deserve my salary,and I have invested my own time and money to pay for additional cpd and degrees. I safe and spend wisely

" guess you are counting marrying 'well' as social mobility though. Which, depressingly, it undoubtedly is. Marriage/a serious relationship with an upwardly mobile partner is of course one major way that someone can change their socio and economic circumstances."

That is true. But this is what I was meaning by how we are lucky to be born now. Only 100 years ago or so as a female, a majority of us either were born into wealth, worked in an a back-breaking job or married well.

Now in the year 2011 we are lucky that the choices are far more abundant.

Rose that is a fair point.

I trust that my DC will enjoy the fruit of DH and my graft/luck/persistence and have a much easier path.

"He's the one with the top degree and top job, not me.
So which one of us married well? "

You, unless you brought a huge dowry that he is living off.

The norm is more than people do well from nothing and perhaps their chilren a little better and the g eneration have more than is good for them, have no goals, end up on drugs and then benefits and spend the fortune. Social mobility means people going down as well as up. Despate what the press says Britain has fairly good social mobility compared to many countries. My great grandfather worked in the mines.

In a sense you don't want your children to have too much of an easier path, though. I would ensure people on the thread who have money are careful about that. If it's too easy many people then do nothing.

Well I suppose Made in Chelsea could provide some evidence for your post Xenia

But they are an extreme example!

True Xenia. I want my DC to have an easier path than I, but not easy iyswim.

They know that their school and iniersity fees will be paid, but after that that they will have to get a job. We don't tell them about other investments we have made for them.

I agree with her sorry - if she works hard she deserves it. No reason you can't do the same rather than relying on state handouts.