A lot of people seem to be getting very worked up about the fact that I seem to be worked up. :)
There's an awful lot of missing the point going on here, but I'll try and answer some of them although I think some people have said things I would have said anyway. (Beertrixpotter, projectbabyweight, katiemiddleton made some excellent points, the race analogy particularly I think).
To those who say I'm Being Ungrateful. I've already said I appreciate the time and effort the PTA put in, I also appreciate that these presents were bought with the best of intentions. This is why I feel I need to proceed tactfully. I'm amused my choice of the word 'Fuming' has been made an issue. Anyone who knows me will tell you I have never 'steamrollered' anyone into anything, no, although I do do my best to stand up to the corporate steamroller of the pinkification and sexualisation of little girls. :) As I said I'm quite a shy, quiet person by nature. I always do my best to take other people's feelings into account, it's more of a problem for me to express my own feelings effectively. Perhaps, that's why I used fuming, when annoyed would have done quite as well, not really the point though is it?
To those who think I should just accept thankfully and without comment. Accepting without comment will only lead to the same situation next year and will leave me feeling unsatisfied that I didn't stand up for the best interests of the children.
To everyone who inferred my daughter is a spoilt brat - she has been taught to accept all present graciously, and I would always do the same, or graciously refuse. Odd that some of the people who suggest I should be gracious and say thankyou also think it's ok to call my child a brat, not very gracious really is it? Anyway, this is besides the point too.
And - just because it's free or cheap doesn't mean I have to like it. To use another analogy - 'Here, here's a free badge for you, be grateful, it's a lovely yellow star'. And no I am not comparing the two situations, merely pushing the 'it's a free gift, be grateful' argument to a logical conclusion.
By some arguments just because someone, (the PTA) puts time and effort in...anything they do is right? I think not.
Neither is it about not being satisfied with anything. I'd be happy for them to donate to a good cause instead, or happy with any toy that was given out to all of them. I liked the point about the toys themselves being gender neutral, just not the way they are given out. Absolutely.
I agree with some of the points made about consumerism, I think kids do get too much tat, but that's off the point too.
Those who claim I am whinging about something rather than getting involved are also way off the mark. I am as involved with the PTA as I've had the opportunity to be so far, and it's my intention to be as fully involved as possible with them.
And as for the 'It's just a little gift - it doesn't matter in the great scheme of things' argument? Nor does your life. Big things are made up of lots of little things.
I'm sad so many people think this is just fine. Cars for boys, flowers for girls, fine, really? Yes, it may be just one present, but it's from Santa/from the school and while I may smile through gritted teeth and thank an individual who is nice enough to buy my child a present, even a Disney Princess piece of tat, I expect better from the school. I expect them to encourage girls and boys to explore their full potential, not to be given traditional gendered gifts that drive home the message of pretty pink for girls and brrrm brrrm for boys. It is an issue. It may be a small issue to some, but if you don't stand up for yourself on small issues, they are liable to snowball and turn into big issues. It's all part of that constant drip-drip message of narrowing down choices for girls and boys. I think this is something that should be challenged and I intend to challenge it. Not sure exactly how, yet, but I will definitely be around to make sure this doesn't happen next year.
Thankyou to those who have made practical suggestions. I may suggest the sack to pick from, or if that fails, that they be opened at home.
So, it's not about being ungrateful. It's not about my emotional health. Whether my child (or any child) likes the present or not is also not the point. It's purely about genderisation, the the messages children are being given when they get these gifts.