to want to buy my neice a 'welcome to womanhood' present...

[dandycandyjellybean]

...as she started her periods yesterday? Any suggestions, if nbu?

Huge old thread and CBA to read it all so , going in blind. As a child who's mother rang all and sundry to announce my first period...I would have LOVED a present! Would have made me focus less on my dotty old bat of a mother :)

Op That sounds lovely, wish you were my aunt.

She's just happy she'll get a pressie, we should have all realised that'd be all most preteen/teen girls would care about :). Gawd knows DD will feel the same....

But must admit, there is no way on earth I can envision particularly telling anybody when DD starts menstruating. Maybe on here if she has a problem and I need to offload/seek advice. It just won't be newsworthy, otherwise.

scottishmummy
initiation into womanhood my god i bet you go to vulva awareness classes or something like that

Definitely best post of the thread.

I asked my dd if she'd like a celebration last time there was a thread like this. She said no, but presents would be very nice. So presents she will be getting.

My experience of having periods as a teenager was that they were very painful and that my mother was totally unsympathetic. I can at least make sure that the second part of that is not true for dd.

sexbombbikerchick you sound like a fabulous aunt

They'll be selling cards in Clintons next.

I think it's a great idea, let it be celebrated as something good, not taboo, icky, vile, shameful.

It's about time the things that make us women were considered great!

They'll be selling cards in Clintons next

My award for post of the week

I was pretty excited about starting my periods as my mum treated it more like a rite of passage, I felt grown up. Wouldn't have wanted a present off anyone else though.

Oh my God, not heels OP....please not heels.

Welcome to womanhood now start the inappropriate wearing of adult shoes.

Public celebration of menarche is, IMO, very primitive behaviour. As is public celebration of first sexual intercourse.

rapunselsoldaunt ' cleansing'? WTF?
Not liking the implication that there is anything about us that needs to be 'cleansed'. When you have a cold and blow your nose, are you 'cleansing' it? Our endometrium thickens, and if not pregnant, needs to be discarded. Physical process, end of. No cleansing required. That kind of language is tied up with a cultural history of women being dirty. Not for me.

And as for being able to have children... Maybe you need years of unsuccesful trying and then expensive IVF to not see a period as some fertility symbol.

My grandmother did similar.

My mum told her i had started my periods and she bought me a coat as a present and then later on felt it necessary to announce it to her group of friends, in front of me that i had 'started my monthlies', and my new coat had been bought for that reason. It was so embarassing.

God i enjoyed the day when i could throw that damned coat away.

Take her for a girly day out, manicure, lunch, shopping etc - but please dont make her periods the reason!!

She will be mortified!

OP you sound like an awesome auntie. Its a lovely idea which I am sure will make her feel really special.

I was pretty chuffed when I finally started my periods - 14! and felt very grown up so would have loved some funky heals (still would )

I still don't think that buying someone else shoes without them trying them on makes any sense, whatever the reason to celebrate.

Agree that buying somebody else shoes is weird. Buying somebody who is still a child, blood or not, a pair of high heels is horrible imho - but it seems I'm a lone wolf in this opinion.

I must admit that I think it is an odd reason to buy someone a present. The trouble is that you will start a precedent and you will be expected to buy presents for a lot of other firsts.

When DD starts her periods I shan't make a big thing of it.

OP, you are fully entitled to your raspberry emoticon. I personally find the idea of period presents utterly boakworthy - but I think you are quite fabulous for not flouncing in the face of all our horrid comments.

BUT: high heels???? Oh no. I have never felt anything in common with feminists until I started reading this thread (not aimed at you personally, OP). The idea that periods = womanhood = high heels, manicures, facials, shopping, chocolate and fluffy hot water bottles is just unspeakably depressing and I think I might have to flounce off myself to the feminist threads for the first time in my life.

My DD is 14, her periods started a year ago and she doesnt wear heels because I dont feel its appropriate. Have you checked with her mum OP that she is ok for you to buy these? i wouldnt be happy with my sister if she took it upon herself to buy heels for DD.

My mum announced about my periods to several classes at my school - she was a biology teacher there.
Girls' school, luckily.

Far from not having forgiven her, though, I think it is pretty cool. I think the lack of embarrassment about this kind of thing is quite a gift, given the prevailing culture telling you you should be embarrassed.

When you say heels do you mean party shoes like the ones Monsoon do with a tiny heel. That's what my niece calls heels and I bought her a pair for Xmas parties last week

OP is clearly a kind Aunt who gets on very well with her Niece.

Personally, the only similar present I'd have wished for in the same circumstances would have been a shovel - so that I could dig a hole to hide in . The words 'kill me now' spring to mind..

Imho, you're simply being there for her if/when she wants to talk will be the ultimate pressie

I agree with Bonsoir - why celebrate something so primitive. You may as well throw a party when her wisdom teeth come through, or her first bout of thrush.

I think periods should just be accepted as something normal, talk about your own periods with your daughter and say 'this will start with you when you are 12 or so' and be no nonsense about it.

DD started her period just before her 12th birthday, she called me when I was in Tesco, talked for 5 minutes about nonsense, and then she said 'oh by the way, mum, I have started my period, I don't like the feel of the pads which were in the cupboard, please get me different ones'.

No nonsense. No need for any fuss, either positive or negative, imo.

OP - why are you telling us to draw a line under it? It is an open thread, you don't own the discussion.

Was this wrong? Or do you mean a pair of stripper shoes? I still wouldn't buy her a gift for this specific reason though. Btw, would yOur sister have told you if your niece handnt. I know mine wouldn't.

Well said GetOrfMo1Land. I don't think periods are something to be celebrated or cursed. They're just a fact of life. And why do people keep saying to buy her chocolate? I've been having periods for nearly 40 years and never felt the need to have a bar of chocolate every time I came on. Just as well really, I'd probably be even fatter than what I already am.