to want to buy my neice a 'welcome to womanhood' present...

[dandycandyjellybean]

...as she started her periods yesterday? Any suggestions, if nbu?

I think if she told you herself then sending her some chocolate and a hot water bottle is lovely. No need for any detailed card or books on feminism or mooncup or anything . A discreet parcel that no-one (eg siblings) would ask her about might be spot on. You know hetr better than we do .

I remember being ridiculously excited when I had my first because it was a sign of growing up. Thankfully the horror of ongoing PMT and mess and pain for the rest of my adult life took longer to sink in .

My DD is 12 and 3/4 so...any minute now. In our occasional chats about the imminent event we did discuss a book she'd been reading about an African girl who has a celebration when she gets her first period.
I teased her about having a little celebration or something when she starts and my (outgoing, confident, not-ashamed-of-her-body) girl said she'd actually DIE, after killing me, if I told anyone or made a thing of it.
When her mate came for a sleep over and was having her first period her mum told me but made me swear not to let on I knew - and I've known this child for all her life and she's like another daughter.
I wouldn't do it!

Would have done the slightly grown up girly day out with her but we don't live close enough.

I wasn't suggesting that she's no longer a little girl, or anything weird, just thought as she had told me and she wasn't embarrassed then maybe a little sort of 'welcome to the club' acknowledgement was in order, hence the choc and hot water bottle. Let this one slip of judgement not forever taint me

And let me just repeat, please, she told me herself, she is a very straightforward, forthright girl, quite tomboyish and not embarassed about it at all....

I'll just get me coat....

I know a lot of musmnetters don't do Twitter, but this sounds like an @YourAuntDiane idea.

She might not be embarrassed, but if she has siblings it might create the need for conversations that your neice (and her parents ) might not want to have ( Muuuum! Why has Kevina got a present from Auntie SexBomb? It's not her birthday! I want a present from Auntie Sexbomb tooooo! )

Well I think it's a nice idea! Especially since she told you herself and wasn't funny about it. If you're posting it straight to her there's no reason for her to be embarrassed about receiving a gift. I don't know why everyone's so revolted by the idea. And no, of course she's not really an adult yet, but it still marks the start of a certain stage in her life. My mum gave me a present when I first got my period, I thought it was nice (the present, not the period, I was really pissed off about that!)

Just send some chocolate or something. It doesn't have to be anything actually period-based, although I quite like the hot water bottle idea.

That cake makes me feel a bit sick.

I remember my friend getting a card from a distant French cousin when we were teenagers, something like Saint Catherine. We managed to established that it was something to do with period, and decided that must be a period of time. We were utterly horrified when we found out that it was notification that she'd started her periods. French perverts!

If she's told you herself then a present might be nice, but I wouldn't have it being too directly related to it. If her mother has told you, I'd treat her to something grown up like a manicure next time you see her. I would have been mortified at that age if anyone wanted to make a big song and dance about my periods.

ROFL at the cake! Though a bit bleurgh too.

I echo bottle of WKD and condoms

Chocolate and hot water bottle sounds like she is ill imo.

Well, whatever you do don't get her How To Be A Woman. Caitlin Moran spends her 13th year frantically masturbating and I have to say, the thought wouldn't have occurred to me at that age

Not dissing the book, but it's a look back rather than a look forward

If I'd been bought choc and a hot water bottle when I started my periods id have been a lot happier than with the nappy size sanitary pads that my mum actually bought me. If she told you herself and isn't easily embarrassed then I can't see why not? Would be nice if this sort of thing wasnt seen as embarrasing.

It's not something to be unhappy about. It's a sign of growing up. And comparing it to poo makes me think of all the people who go at the mention of moon cups because they can't face the idea of touching their menstrual blood.

I'm not saying throw a party with tampon bunting. Just a token gift to mark the moment.

I'll have to read that Caitlin Moran book. That's how I spent my 13th year too.

Then I take it all back, given that she's told you, go ahead and get a gift. How about something from Hotel Chocolat? They do postable stuff that's suitably grown up.

Sorry, but the whole idea seems very distinctly odd to me.

Crikey chaos! I clicked that linky feeling confident it was gonna be one of those vagina cupcakes, but that beast of a cake was on a whole new level of ick.

And I have a mooncup.

I was going to side with those saying she'd be mortified but I've now read the thread. Since she told you herself and your suggestion is not embarrassing or weird, I don't see why not. It's a way of acknowledging what she's told you and showing that you're supportive.

I once told one of my friends that I'd been suffering with dreadful period pains and he sent me a hot water bottle in the post (all the way from the USA). It was really thoughtful and sweet.

Just no.

Caitlin Moran book is really good, but not for a young teenager I don't think.

Oh noooo

even if she told you herself

noooooooooo

See it sounds a nice idea to me now, but thinking back, I would have been mortified at that age, did not want anyone to know or talk about it at all.

You know her though, and we don't - if you think it's something she'd like, then go for it.

Step away from the chocolate and hot water bottles...that makes it all a bit namby pamby 'curl up and die' imo.

Sadly she's going to have to toughen up pretty quick to the idea of simply 'getting on with it' when she has a period.

May I suggest a beautiful bouquet of hand arranged tampons?

You do sound like a lovely aunt.

NOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!

Gordy I absolutely WET myself laughing at your link.

I now can't wait for my niece to be of that age so I can buy her that kit and we can celebrate together, all the while absolutely pissing ourselves laughing. God the things people come up with. I love it.