To be p@&ed off with my dh when I read this message to his mate

[Penny1976]

I never poke about in his emails but he sent this via facebook to a friend who is a shared friend who is expecting a baby and when the friend replied it came into our shared email folder as well as to his facebook and I read it to see if the baby had been born.

And there was his mate's reply to this little jem from my DH:

Hi how you doing im at home on my own chillin , XXX at the pictures andthe kids in bed.arrival.went out with D and C last night into xxx,mad night though i wasnt pissed ....sat at the table this young pissed girl, not that fit sat down and started moaning about her boyfriend in a party upstairs of the pub,cut along story short ,without any leading on said to me you have big balls come back to my hotel and let me see them,it ended up she wanted to take me daz and craig at the same time , then she left the pub at the end of the night, f&^%

I am really cross about it, he says nothing happened and I have no right to be.

Any thoughts guys? I am heavily pregnant myself so may be slightly over sensitive at the mo?

I have posted this under a new identity so no-one realises who I am by the way.

It's wierd isn't it?

I was thinking about the scene in bed last night = me and 2 girlfriends are sitting in a pub having a catch-up. A drunken ugly bloke comes up moaning about his girlfriend. Tell you what love, he says. You look like you've got nice tits - how about all of us go back to a hotel and I'll do you all?

Now I'm sorry but all we would do is look at each other eyebrows raised and move away if he didn't leave us alone. And I would definitely tell DH about it in a OMG way when I got home.

Just disappointed about his lack of standards I guess.

penny1976, bingo that is the normal reaction. Mrspoc, are you taking notes?

DrSpok has got tired of mumsnet and has gone to watch StarWars.

I think the lack of standards thing would bother me too OP.

My partner is a bit of a blokey bloke sometimes, but I can't imagine him talking that way about a woman.

Yes spoc, my life is one big tragedy. Nothing like not marrying someone who can't string a a sentence together and moves their mouth when they read to sadden a person. Sorry, but if you are in a relationship with someone that stupid, or you are that stupid, or think that sort of speech and behaviour is normal, then you are the one who is in need of sympathy and pity.
And why are you calling gapants "luv", there is no such word in English as "luv", and she certainly is not your "love" (going by the fact she can write).

I think I love you kelly

do I know you ?

Allboxedin, I don't mix MN and FB luv

I'm hurt and offended AF :(
Kelly, I agree but I don't think it is just down to stupidness, I think it's just bloody laziness to be honest. It annoys me too that no one has any respect of our language anymore and can't be bothered with simple punctuation.
I was always a pretty rubbish speller but some of the stuff that comes out on facebook and the like now is just crazy. A foreign lady said to me the other day ' I came to England to learn English, but no one speaks or writes English here!'

if you are so hung up on the english language then you should realise that language changes. Words meanings change with location, slang etc.

If you belive your self to be so well educated then you should at least understand this simple context.

language is fluid,changeable and has specific cultural and regional nuances. so expectation of textbook written english and enunciated plums in gob is well off mark

thats what makes language so fascinating that it can change,and develop.and end up having different permutations

Mrspoc, language tends to evolve not devolve. It is not things like spelling etc, but the actual language used, and the way things are written. The text the OP showed looked like it came from someone who had to move their lips whilst reading (sorry OP). Normally, intelligent people do not write like that.

Allboxedin,
I think that the sort of people who write on facebook, would not have been writing anything a few years ago. That is one good thing about texting and social networking, it gets people who would normally have to put a cross in by their name to at least write something. On the other hand, and I realise this is snobby, facebook was better when not everyone could use it. Now it accepts hotmail and the like, and not just university emails it has become the haven of stupidity. But again, that means you get to see exactly how stupid some people are which is quite interesting (and scary).

Oh please. People don't misspell because they are contributing to the gradual evolution of language, they do it because they are lazy or apathetic or ignorant. (Or have learning disabilities, which is an entirely different matter.)

It's like saying 'oh it's no big deal if I break some laws because the law is evolving all the time anyway'.

I don't actually like judging people based on their writing ability -- I am judging the OP's DH by the content and not form of his message. But let's not pretend it's not laziness.

rubbish.urban culture,text speak etc all change how words are said and written.isnt an indication of lazy or slack at all

You've got a shared email folder? How early 90ies is that?

scottishmummy,
actually in the long term urban culture does not make any difference to how things are written, as it does not contribute to literature in a permenant way. It may change the spoken word in some areas and age groups but only for a short time.
But I do not think minor mis-spelling is much of an issue, it is more when people use your not you're etc, and cannot properly formulate sentence's and structure. I think a lot of people mispell words seriously (i.e when they spell them phonetically) simply because they do not read and really have no idea how the words are supposed to be spelt. There have been several articles in the press recently about people who do not have one book in their household, and just never read.

dont agree,read white teeth,train spotting etc packed with urban slang in written prose. of course urbanity contributes to words and literature

It's got nothing to do with 'how' words are written. My God if we all went about spelling things how we pleased then how the hell is any child of ours going to learn?
Yes, language evolves, new words appear in the dictionary each year, I don't see how not using punctuation, spelling words how we like and generally not giving a shit doodles what we write and when contributes to the evolution of the English language.
Generally people who do have a real problem with literacy are not going about shouting it from the rooftops.

...errm, I think I just said pretty much what DB said .....nevermind!

I have taught children as young as four overseas who write better English than many adults do over here, so in my opinion it is not rocket science that a sentence starts with a capital letter or that a full stop goes at the end.....
But then the big question is.............what is a sentence?

kelly Whilst I respect your desire to keep electronic communication (including email and chat/forum messages) clear of obvious grammatical and spelling mistakes I suggest you yourself write as you preach.

If you do not/cannot it just proves the point that internet messaging is not a off-shot of literary but rather a spoken word and should be treated as such.

Before you launch into my obvious spelling/grammar shortcomings I have to raise my hands and point out that I am not a native English speaker and cannot be arsed to spell-check/proof read what I write here. I do not demand the same from others as long as their communicate their thoughts in a coherent way.

their=they

bemy,
I suggest you reread what I said. I said it was not mispelling that was the issue, but the actual way people wrote, ie exactly what you said -they need to write in a coherant way, which many do not.

The email the OP copied was actually quite hard to understand, and the whole point people were making was that it was obvious from the way he was speaking in the text that he was a bit of a dimwit.

"i ad a well gud tim laz nite coz i got wel pized innit", is not a case of a few simple spelling mistakes made through haste, but that is exactly how some people write, and writing on fb and texts etc will be the only writing and reading they ever do.

bemy, you write very well for a non native English speaker. I don't think it is about minor mistakes/mispelt words or even the lack of punctuation, but at the end of the day when you have to read something 5 times to try and understand what someone is saying,people get fed up because they have to spend time working it out!
We all write quickly and hastily when online, there are sure to be mistakes. Many of us have little children running around or in arms as we write and no one is asking for perfect English but surely a little pride in our language is not a bad thing?

"then she left the pub at the end of the night, f&^%"

That's the bit that would piss me off - sounds like he was disappointed...

Sure nothing happened but he sounds like a charmless and ineloquent twit :o