to think IPOAT gels will never marry well if they continue to be so fast?

[CaptainHornblower]

Mistress Riven, thank mercy someone is at the Hall to prepare for our homecoming! Mind you don't fall under Culler Jnr's hammer.

Yes do let's go back to dear old blighty. The cider apples will be ready. I am sure we can get the teleporter cranked up.

Inspired by Mistress Mini's Teleporter reference and still waiting for the ladies and gels to tear themselves away from the gauchos I have invented the Flying IPOAT contraption to bring us swiftly back to IPOAT Hall.

The fruit is heavy on the trees and vines, all is a'ripening in the hedgerows and we must hasten back to the distillery drying shed to commence work on our autumnal poultices, tisanes and possets.
Supplies are dangerously low.

Teleporter? Beam me up, Scotty!

We are Umami. We will assimilate you.

Are we ready for an intergalactic adventure. Will the crinoline fit into the teleporter . Are the Borg ready to tat? Can we make it so.

Here we go Hold on to your hats...

I'm sorry.

All my fun has been crushed by the poo merchants.

I shall try to regather my wits

I like your disguise Lizard

Pore ol' Hully, crushed by the poo merchants. Have a Chakotay to cheer you up.

Apologies dear ladies, for my absence, I was abducted while wandering innocently amidst the colourful markets of Buenos Aries, and have just now escaped the the chains of the evil Broadbandia Virginia Banditos, whom I cunningly enchanted to take small pursess of maidenjuice I had secreted in secret chambers stitched into my calico undergarments. Never was I so grateful for the teachings of the dear ladies of Pennsylvania!

I arrive, breathless, undergarmentless, yes still in possession of my virtue.. quit we these evil shores? I shall surely abandon all thoughts of DonJulio for the safety of my dear sister's company! DonDiego is speaking for me for I forgot in my confusion my own name.

An intergalactic adventure appeals greatly and of course we can time-travel and still be back in time to harvest the cider apples and go apickin' along the hedgerows.

Perhaps he could be our guide.

Looks like he'd be handy with his screwdriver.

Which poo merchants are those Hully, tell us and we'll zap em with our phasers.

Oooh phasers! Much more effective than a riding crop.

Oh lord, Hully, I had a look - what is this latest outbreak of madness? Or perhaps better not to ponder on it at all, lest we sully our thread.

OOoo, an intergalatic adventure! Fabulous!

I am afraid I may have missed Fid's marvellous invention, but fortunately I managed to get a lift with a friendly passer-by Apparently he has a very fast ship so I should catch up in no time. He's going to teach me to play tiddly-winks in the mean time doesn't that sound like fun!

I wasn't so lucky with my passers by

Still I'm sure we'll get there eventually. I just don't think I can cope with the smell

I will be travelling with some very old friends of mine . We shall hold our belts and jaunt. (Who remembers the Tomorrow People?)

I remember Tomorrows People, and Blakes Seven. Umami can be Servalan. Am V.V. Old.

I remember the Tomorrow's People too, and I loved Blake's Seven.

How lucky we are that our time spent tatting and sipping home-made gin possets has kept us looking and feeling youthful.

I believe we are refreshed and ready for our intergalactic adventure. Who wants to fire up the engines?

I don't want to go anywhere where there are daleks. They are Bad Eggs.