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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think IPOAT gels will never marry well if they continue to be so fast?

999 replies

CaptainHornblower · 28/09/2011 18:15

OP posts:
Hullygully · 14/10/2011 15:53

Wasn't it?

Right, I'm not going out there again. Everyone is talking about poo. It's clearly me who's out of step, but what is funny and/or interesting about poo? Really? Unless you're three?

Anyway.

I am going to console myself with a brace of gauchoes.

Fiderer · 14/10/2011 16:34

These do you Hully?

I don't think it's you who's out of step. I haven't the heart to fight these days.

(Plus I am admittedly over-sensitive after recent events. "Disasters" with the 3 Fids was an exaggeration, we're all right. I worry how affected they are by what's happening and ds2 has just refused to go with his dad for the weekend)

Hullygully · 14/10/2011 16:40

No they are a very poor show. Where is the swagger and bragadocio of the plains, eh? eh?

Strength vibes for you and Fidses minors.

Fiderer · 14/10/2011 16:47

?

Fiderer · 14/10/2011 16:49

??

Hullygully · 14/10/2011 17:06

Ah've been looking, but ah've had to give up, I've already won 74 iphones and a cuddly toy...

minimammoth · 14/10/2011 18:16

choice is getting better Fids.

Sending vibes for the 'diisasters'. All quiet on the western front this end. Both carefully avoiding the 'subject'.

UMaimedMe · 14/10/2011 21:25

Hello! I am thoroughly inebriated. I have partaken of the vino tinto and the oloroso. Am now drunk woman on train. Bring on the gauchos.

minimammoth · 14/10/2011 21:37

Remember to get off at right stop. Bawdy behaviour does not become one of your ipoat standing, think of the example you are setting for the gels. Tut, tat.

Hullygully · 14/10/2011 22:29

Huzzah! Go Widow go!

RatherBe · 14/10/2011 22:36

Buenos noches! I am feeling scarred by currants and candied peel and stained by icing as I have tried to avoid the fighting with the buns on other threads.

RatherBe · 14/10/2011 23:08
RatherBe · 14/10/2011 23:09
Hullygully · 15/10/2011 09:50
Fiderer · 15/10/2011 12:41

Oh gels. AH's response to my reporting him to the police is, as I feared, to start war by lawyer.
Have been approaching the post box with some trepidation all week and today got a letter. Either I agree to sell the house and accept a desultory amount of maintenance for the children (a third of what he is legally obliged to pay), nothing for me (which I'd happily do without but he is still legally obliged to pay as I earn so much less) or he will stop paying the mortgage and the house will be auctioned off.

I will call my lawyer on Monday - it's easily ?500 a consultation plus letter to respond but the free advice centre can't fight back on the legal front. Ironically despite my income, the value of the house is enough that I'm not eligible for Legal Aid.

I feel so bloody alone with all this here.

Hullygully · 15/10/2011 13:43

Oh Fidsy. deep breath and remember how you eat an elephant: one mouthful at a time.

Have you got any family there or here or somewhere?

Are you prepared to sell the house? Could you put it on the market right now (to shut him up if nothing else) while you fight the rest? Is there a meditaion service?

Fiderer · 15/10/2011 14:35

No family here and family in UK are "Oh dear well I don't know what to say" (my mother) and the unspoken "You should have stayed with him for the children's sake" from my brothers.
After I reported him it was "Oh you shouldn't have done that it will make things worse" from mother but lots of supporting messages and phone calls from my brothers. But I can't call them and weep and rant, if you know what I mean.

Mediation - yes, we had one meeting and he cancelled any further after I reported him. His lawyer's letter stated it "failed" which isn't true. We agreed to look at selling the house if that were the best financial option.

The whole house thing is tricky, the property market isn't anything like the UK. I love the house but I would sell it to have a home h can't appear in as and when he likes. The financial side is all up in the air as we don't know if his contract will be renewed in January so how much money there will be to rent or buy is so uncertain. Hence my reluctance to put the house on the market - I do not want to be stuck renting somewhere I can't afford. I know what's on the market here, renting and buying and it will cost us more than the mortgage on this house. It is an emotional decision on AH's part, not a rational one.

He has ds1 and dd for the weekend and I'm worried what he's saying to them, especially ds1.

Hullygully · 15/10/2011 14:47

Fidsy, I can't offer practical advice - I haven't got a clue how it works where you are, but do rant here whenever you want!

Fiderer · 15/10/2011 15:05

Thanks Hully, it helps to rant, but I always feel bad about sidetracking light-hearted threads. Also glum enough to not want to brave the Relationships topic again. Not that I wouldn't welcome advice, but it's all very fraught and uncertain on there atm and frankly I have enough of that already.

minimammoth · 15/10/2011 19:28

Am with Hully on that one. Rant away. It helps to vent sometimes. Pm also. Also at a loss as to offering advice but hope you find a way Fids.
Can we get tea and cake here, or is it tapas. has Ratherbe shuffled off, if not do have tea dear.

Fiderer · 15/10/2011 20:44

Thank you. There is the OTBT topic. Might post there when I've seen the lawyer and leave IPOAT unsullied. Tonight ds2 has a friend sleeping over (one of my charges from Dotheboys Hall) and on Monday term and work starts again.
Tonight West Wing Box Set I think.

Rivenwithoutabingle · 15/10/2011 20:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

minimammoth · 15/10/2011 21:24

Possets all round.

Fiderer · 15/10/2011 21:33

Are we ever going back to IPOAT Hall? Mini's mention of possets has made me come over all IPOATy and yearn for a quiet day pretending to tatt and sloping off to the distillery herb-drying shed.
Who knows what havoc Watkins has wreaked in our absence.

Rivenwithoutabingle · 15/10/2011 21:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.