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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to expect my DH to know the names of the childrens teachers?

42 replies

messagetoyourudy · 19/09/2011 21:08

Our DS2 has just started school - cue the 3 week lead in of mornings/mornings & lunch etc that has been a logistical feat even though I only work 3 days a week.

I had asked DH to ring his mum to see if she could help and pick up DS2 at lunchtime and DS1 normal time. He didn't know either of the childrens teachers names! I was shocked..........surprised..........and upset - he thinks it's no big deal, but I honestly thought as it has been big news in our home , our youngest starting school, having a home visit from the teacher etc. not to mention our DS1 going up into year 2 & being nervous about being split up from his friends (they changed all the classes to mix up the Jan intakes) I really thought that DH would know this basic information about our childrens lives.

Do your DH/DP know your childrens teachers name?

OP posts:
bibbitybobbityhat · 19/09/2011 21:10

Yes! absolutely.

Hassled · 19/09/2011 21:12

tbh I think DH would struggle with DS3's teacher. In his defence, he works away all week and never goes into school.

Hulababy · 19/09/2011 21:12

Yes, DH does know DD's teachers and has done from day 1. She is now in y5. DH does morning drop offs and has done for most of her schooling. I do afternoon drops. I expect DH to be equally involved in DD's school life and tbh he wouldn't expect not to be either.

GetAwayFromHerYouBitch · 19/09/2011 21:13

Just asked him. 1 out of 3 / OOps

borderslass · 19/09/2011 21:13

DH never knew the kids teachers names.

MaureenMLove · 19/09/2011 21:13

I don't think he did, no. I doubt he even knows the name of the head teacher at her secondary school tbh and she's in yr11!

He's always there, at the school, to support when and if necessary though, so I'm not that bothered.

HandsOffOurLand · 19/09/2011 21:13

I'd think it was unreasonable if DH suddenly started to become interested in the names of the children's teachers, quite frankly. That is my job, not his. Not knowing the teachers' names means that he is normal. Grin

GetAwayFromHerYouBitch · 19/09/2011 21:14

He does care deeply about them and their education, however

maypole1 · 19/09/2011 21:14

To be honest love my oh can just about our names he once remarked at a BBQ who it was I was talking to I said thats your auntie lol

elphabadefiesgravity · 19/09/2011 21:14

YABU. Admittedly when the dc were in reception we both knew the names of their fab teacher however last year we both struggled to remember the names of dd's two year 4 teachers and ds's Year 2 teacher.

SandStorm · 19/09/2011 21:15

Yes but it wouldn't surprise me at all if he hadn't. He works long hours and is rarely at school. He's also rarely home before she goes to bed. I think it helps that they have the same teacher for two years at a go.

dearheart · 19/09/2011 21:15

I'm going to ask him when he comes home! My guess would be he will know dd1's teacher but not the jobsharing teachers of dd2 who has just started reception.

MoreBeta · 19/09/2011 21:19

TBH, I just went to DS1 school introductory evening and I walked in to realise I actually had no idea which class he was in and had to ask another parent if they had heard of my son and if they knew which class he was in.

Luckily they did. Blush

laptopdancer · 19/09/2011 21:21

Mine wouldnt but I havent mentioned it to him.
I have never laid eyes on ds' teacher...wouldnt have a clue what she looks like

MaureenMLove · 19/09/2011 21:21

I've just asked him. He remembers the names of 1 teacher at primary school and the head teachers name. (Not bad, as she left 5 years ago.)

He doesn't have a clue of the name of any teachers at secondary, apart from Mr Harrison the IT teacher. This is because DD has just been vocal about her new IT teacher, called Mr Harrison though! Grin

I asked did he know anything about her school and he said, 'yes, I know where it is!' Grin

AuntiePickleBottom · 19/09/2011 21:23

i don't even know what ds teacher looks like, as the TA opens the main doors and does the home time routine

laptopdancer · 19/09/2011 21:24

I dont know the TA's name if that helps...dont even know if he has one
Blush

troisgarcons · 19/09/2011 21:25

I dont know the name of my sons teachers .... mind you to be fair he has 18 of the buggers!

And no - I only know my Y6s teachers name as she is the choir leader. If she wasn't, I wouldnt have a scooby. And I dont think Hubs even knows where Y6 goes to school.

stealthsquiggle · 19/09/2011 21:26

not sure whether DH would know many, but given that he struggles to remember the names of his cousins' DC, I wouldn't bother taking it as a sign of disinterest.

dearheart · 19/09/2011 22:08

Have asked my dh - he knows all three teachers (and is quite taken aback that I should think he wouldn't!)

PuspornInBoots · 19/09/2011 22:10

I don't know the name of my DCs teachers - I do for the two youngest but can't for the life of me remember what DDs new teacher is called. I only need to know if I have to write a note and I would just ask DD. I don't need or care to know.

aldiwhore · 19/09/2011 22:11

You had a home visit from the teacher???!! Cool! If your DH was around for that then he is BVU to not remember their name, buuuuut.... I spent last year getting my son's teacher's name wrong, much to my shame and IWBVU though apologetic.

Don't get upset though, just use the fact to give him a belittling stare every now and then, for your own ego if nothing else Smile

PatriciaHolm · 19/09/2011 22:15

Just asked and yes, but it took some grimacing Grin (Y1 and Y2) He's never seen them and very rarely does drops/pick ups, so that's pretty good going tbh.

lazylula · 19/09/2011 22:17

Dh knew the married name of ds1's teacher from last year but couldn't recall her maiden name that she went by while ds1 had her, although he did know it while ds1 was in her class. He did not know the name of his teacher this year, mind you I keep forgetting it too! I do not really expect dh to know the name at the moment as he is not here that much as he works long hours and has only really seen ds1 at the weekend when ds1 really doesn't talk about school much. We also do not have the same contact with this teacher as we did with th reception teacher last year. I am sure as he will know it in the end, although this teacher will probably be going on Maternity leave by the end of October, so we will have a new name to remember.

Oakmaiden · 19/09/2011 22:23

Um - I don't even know my children's teachers' names.

My eldest is excusable, as he is in secondary and has lots of teachers. My middle child has a male teacher and it begins with M - or maybe h? I'd have to go and look it up. And the youngest has a double barrelled name, and I know the last part, but not the first bit. But apparently it is OK to just call her the last bit (according to my son).

Frankly it all blurs after the first few years.... So I don;'t think it is unreasonable for your husband to not know the teacher's name, as long as it isn't him dealing with the teacher generally.

I do think it is probably unreasonable that I don't know MY children's teachers' names.... (I have just checked, and my husband DOES know their names, which just goes to show something.... )

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