To be irritated when women play the 'birdlike appetite' shit?

[Proudnscary]

Went to wedding. Every course that came the woman next to my dh bellowed 'Oh my gosh, that's too much I'll never eat that, does anyone want mine' and shoved her food on to his and everyone else's plate - standing up to do so for maximum effect.
The starter was TWO king prawns, the main was TWO slices of roast beef for cripes sake - I inhaled them in seconds.
Why not just leave some on the plate instead of drawing attention to her 'tiny, feminine appetite'?

Good to know A1980

you shouldnt care, babe. I can eat more than my boyf and he is proud of it. he tells all his mates that I eat like a fighter and gets upset when my appetite goes down. I'm proud of it and I call guys a bunch of nancys when they cant eat as much as me!! Be proud of your guzzling!!!! yay!!

pisses me off, its so lame and false. They are just bulimic/anorexic. Then all the rest of us are made to feel like pigs

yes, this drives me mad! ILs do it too - MIL decided that she and PIL would share a rice when we ordered an indian take away. I said I thought we should ahve one each but was overruled. Fine, but of course all the rices ended up together on the table - three between 4 of us. FIL ate his half and half of mine and then at the end they all agreed how we'd had just the right amount of rice - but I had half my curry left

Oh StealthPolarBear I sympathise with this - if I go for a curry with my parents my dad goes "you and your mum will share a rice" - no discussion required - then looks when I say let's get a naan bread as well then!

YANBU

I love my food but my appetite varies quite a bit according to the time of the month and how much exercise I do.

Sometimes I will finish a decent size plate and sometimes I will leave what I don't want, as I hate eating beyond what I need and getting that stuffed feeling. However, I hate wasting food so if I decide to leave some I will offer it to DP, who has a huge appetite, or to any other friend who is obviously eyeing it up.

There is no need to make a big fuss about it though.

It was a little while ago and I still remember the detail - the injustice of it!
She even mentioned it yesterday - "lovely takeaway but too mcuh rice". Next time they make a big fuss about this I am going to go along with it and then when it's all gone & I need more I'll zap one of those Uncle Ben sachets

It would annoy me too but I can't say why!

I guess sometimes people say things because they don't want to say the truth, or it's just to keep the conversation going. In reality, maybe she didn't like the starter, or maybe she did have an eating disorder, but she made an excuse to deflect questions about why she was leaving it

Lady Beagle, I don't object to people doing that if they just get on and do it and enjoy their meal. It's obviously silly to order food you know you won't eat. It's the competitive, drawing attention to it element that annoys, especially if the people doing it sit there giving evils to those who are eating a starter / main / dessert / chips or whatever.

Complaining that portions are too large is as rude as declaring in a loud voice that the portions are tiny, you are still ravenous and you will stop off for chips on the way home.

As a guest you just say how lovely it all is and leave what you can't manage (or stop for chips without letting all and sundry know about it).

YANBU - there is no need to make a big fuss and like Slave said, if someone has a genuine eating disorder they want to be as unobtrusive as possible. When I was heading for anorexia 20 years ago I hid it by making enormous cakes and lots biscuits, and making a big show of being around food a lot. Never ate any of it and no-one noticed. I blamed drastic weight loss on walking friend's dog too much.

A real pet hate of mine is people,usually women, who nibble chocolate bars. If you want it bloody well eat it, don't chew itsy little bits off the side and coo over each mouthful.

Conversely, I can't understand this obsession that some of the older generation have with exclaiming about "how well" someone has done with their food especially children. My inlaws are terrible for this, we will go out to a family pub for lunch, and my kids will eat their fill and if their plate is empty or nearly empty will exclaim "ooh, YOU'VE done well!" as if they deserve a round of applause. And i want to say, "it is not an achievement to eat every last morsel. They haven't done well OR badly whatever they have eaten, they have simply eaten as much as their stomachs have told them to and stopped when they felt full."

Ps I would rather they say "ooh, looks like you enjoyed that, eh? Was it tasty?"

Eating like a bird... in my patch that means little but every single minute of the day...

harriet, I used to watch in horrified fascination all the female commuters who nibbled chocolate.

Open bar of chocolate.
Nibble corner.
Rewrap chocolate.
Put in pocket/handbag/briefcase.
Fidget a bit.
Take it out again.
Unwrap.
Nibble.
Rewrap.
Put away.
Fidget......

Just eat it FFS.

Piprabbit, I would never annoy you like that. Just eat it (ffs) is my mantra.

OP, YANBU. I had to have a Talk with my mother about doing this in front of my DCs at every single meal. They didn't see her to often and it was very noticeable.

I always suspect eating disorder when I hear someone doing this. Bulimia maybe.

I have a good appetite and never stint myself on food when in company. Once I was in a meeting where all the others were men. I took a choc biscuit when offered some, and the men sniggered. They were (I thought) clearly expecting me to simper and refuse.

I am proud of my ability to eat half a cow in one sitting. YANBU. Sit her next to me and I'll scoff her too!

I go with the Miss Piggy philosophy........'Never eat more than you can carry'! 'Sparrows' drive me nuts!

Just to make it clear - I wasn't ashamed of my guzzling! But if I was v overweight maybe I would have been - I don't know? I am 'normal' sized, could do with losing a few pounds but... you know, meh.
Interestingly there was another woman at the wedding (a good friend actually) who is very large and she says she never ever eats in public. I've heard that before - not with such searing honesty but it's quite common.
So many food fixations and issues and anxieties...

I hear you OP, it is the attracting attention about it that is annoying. My Dh used to date a girl who did this, the 'oh no, I couldn't possibly...'. He found it really irritating and he thinks it is a attention seeking female thing. He also said to me the girls in his office are always doing the 'oh those shoes are nice... what size are you?... oh they would be hooooge on me....' - I think it is funny that he sees all that shit that women do to one another. But gives me very little room for manipulation of course

You are being entirely reasonable

Dinner chez Turnip is like with Abert Finney (complete with chase round the table up to bedchamber afterwards.)

You Are Not Being Unreasonable if it is for show; I do know some ladies who genuinely eat very little, but they certainly don't make a song and dance about it.

Yes Pinky my dh saw straight through it too. He actually said it was unsisterly and was surely one of those unspoken rules you don't break - ie making other women (potentially) feel like greedy pigs!

Its not that she didn't eat, but that she made such a big fuss. People like that I hate mildly dislike, and they tend to do it for more than just eatimg too.....