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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not be sure who is wrong in the Golly dispute?

279 replies

Mitmoo · 07/09/2011 07:41

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2034203/Grandmother-faces-court-placing-Golliwog-window-dispute-neighbour-black-wife.html

OK it's a DM to flame me but never the less..........

A grandmother has a longrunning dispute over boundary issues, which I know from personal experience can be extremely distressing, even though in my case it was just a part of my small back garden not serious land as in this case.

The grandmother IMO was probably being racist in putting the golly in her window, but it is in her house and no one is being forced to look at it. She says it is a grandchild's toy and was put there only while tidying up. Other neighbour was so offended they photographed it!

But AIBU in thinking the other couple were being ridiculous to go to the police about it and now the original woman (probably in the wrong, don't buy the grandchilds toy story) could be facing two years in jail?

Perhaps there is an argument for granny being a nut in this day and age to buy a golly for a child, while admittedly loved the badges from the jamjars in the 70's.

Ultimately it is a doll, in her house, on her windowsill, she's wrong, she's probably racist but how can this be a good use of our courts, our legal system, this is a neighbour dispute.

How can they prove what was in her mind when she placed the golly in the window sill? AIBU in thinking these families are as bad as each other and are blowing this up out of all proportion, while accepting boundary disputes do get under your skin big time.

It seems to me involving the police was vindictive and a court case over this is unnecessary?

It's the sort of behaviour if I saw it I would say "silly cow" or similar and move on.

Two wrongs and all that. Not defending racist behaviour for a second just seems to me this has been blown out of proportion in making this a court case with possible jail time for having a golly on your windowsill.

Particularly as I am not sure they can prove her intent when putting it there.
We are supposed to be in dire financial straights as a country, how much is this case costing?

OR AIBU?

OP posts:
Bollockstoitall · 07/09/2011 18:25

A person who is friends with a black person, can still be racist.
A person who is married to a black person, can still be racist.
A person with black, or mixed race children, can still be racist.
Just as a black, or mixed race people themselves, can still be racist.

Because all the above, can still think in negative stereotypes.

Acting on Racism doesn't always equate to lynching, beating, killing and whipping, you know.

It can be so subtle.
If you went to a piss poor country, and upon visiting a hospital there, see Brain Surgeons, highly trained Doctors, and specialists trained, in this, that and the other, and you find yourself thinking, "Hmmm, I'd have never have thought it?!", and were surprised at what you saw, that in itself is racism.

Its a weak argument for attempting to excuse yourself of racism because you "have black friends".

tethersend · 07/09/2011 18:31

"In your opinion it hasn't Tethers, in my opinion it has."

Not my opinion, Jaqueline- most of society's.

It wasn't me ringing up Robinsons and telling them to take it off the jam.

"I don't think there is anything else to discuss in that line as neither of us will change our minds, that is something I'm sure we can agree on. "

Ok, well I think I'll probably keep discussing it all the same Smile

grovel · 07/09/2011 18:33

Is it really racism to be pleasantly surprised that a "piss poor country", presumably with rubbish infrastructure, has found the wherewithal train its people in advanced medicine?

ByThePowerOfGreyskull · 07/09/2011 18:34

it is racism, it was a clear action designed to insult the neighbour. It is unacceptable, whether it is possible to prosicute - not sure.

Jaquelinehyde · 07/09/2011 18:52

Well dh must be the worst black person on this planet, the bloody racist!

We also let our children watch Tom and Jerry...Oh my God will the racism in our household ever stop!

grovel · 07/09/2011 18:55

Jaquelinehyde, I like the sound of your horrible, racist DH.

tethersend · 07/09/2011 18:55

Your DH owns a racist doll and says it's not racist.

This makes him wrong.

tethersend · 07/09/2011 18:56

But we're not supposed to be discussing it any more Wink

grovel · 07/09/2011 18:56

tethersend, do you ever find it tiring being so right all the time?

nokissymum · 07/09/2011 18:57

Dsis and i thoroughly enjoy our gollywog growing up, and have very special memories of him, i partcularly loved his big smile and his soft hair, we never attached anything negative towards it, nor did we ever think our golly bore any resemblance to us! It was just a toy, Mr golly.

I honestly find this thread all very amusing and a bit sad.

Malcontentinthemiddle · 07/09/2011 18:58

Being right all the time never gets tiring - other people being wrong, on the other hand..... Wink

(that was a joke. Mainly)

tethersend · 07/09/2011 18:58

Actually grovel, I find it exhilarating. And I'm glad you acknowledge that I'm right.

If everyone else in the world would just do the same, it would make life a lot easier.

forehead · 07/09/2011 19:00

Of course she was being raciot. I do hope she is prosecuted. Vile woman

anewmotivatedme · 07/09/2011 19:10

She was being nasty, but I think its all been blown out of proportion.

My cousin is mixed raced, and she sent off for a robertson gollywog badge. Her parents thought it was harmless, and chose not to explain to her how the cute badge could be considered offensive.

Malcontentinthemiddle · 07/09/2011 19:12

more fool them!

Jaquelinehyde · 07/09/2011 19:24

Tethers according to this it wasn't quite all of society that complained:

'In a statement reported by the BBC, Virginia (Ginny) C. Knox, previously brand director for Robertson's and later Chief Operating Officer of the Culinary Brands Division of RHM, told the Herald Newspaper in Scotland in 2001 that the decision to remove the Golliwogg symbol from Robertson's jam and marmalade jars was taken after research found that children were not familiar with the character, although it still appealed to the older generations. "We sell 45 million jars of jam and marmalade each year and they have pretty much all got Golly on them," said Ms Knox. "We also sell 250,000 Golly badges to collectors and only get 10 letters a year from people who don't like the Golliwogg image."

But yes I must stop discussing it Grin

pranma · 07/09/2011 19:25

I have a golly in the attic-it used to be sculling around the toybox[belonged too dd years ago] but after reading the intensity of mn objections on a previous thread I have hidden it.Uncle Tom wasnt slow or stupid he was an amazingly wise slave who was very cruelly treated in Harriet Beecher Stowe's 'Uncle Tom's Cabin'.Nothing to do with gollies at all.

tethersend · 07/09/2011 19:27

Ok, well if the Gollywog isn't at all racist, then I'm sure you (and your DH) would be happy to dress up as one and walk through Brixton?

And if you believe that load of old bollocks from Ms Knox, then owning a golly may be the least of our worries Grin

pranma · 07/09/2011 19:39

to not too

heleninahandcart · 07/09/2011 19:40

Grin at tethersend Excellent suggestion

a GollyWOG is racist. Placing a symbol of racism to taunt your next door neighbours is NOT a 'trivial matter'

Original poster
Mitmoo · 07/09/2011 19:44

Dressing up as Andy Pandy isn't racist but I wouldn't think anyone would be happy to dress up as Andy Pandy and walk through Brixton.

The Golly used to be able to be a much loved figure by children who would play, cuddle it and never have a racist thought in their heads. I think it's the adults who have spoilt it. And yes I include adults like the grandmother on the OP but also the other woman who has gone to the police as she was so "offended".

OP posts:
tethersend · 07/09/2011 19:47

"The Golly used to be able to be a much loved figure by children who would play, cuddle it and never have a racist thought in their heads."

Did you read the links about its origin, Mitmoo? The gollywog was never an innocent figure which has somehow become corrupted along the way. It was designed specifically to mock, deride, and belittle black people.

Original poster
Mitmoo · 07/09/2011 19:47

hell its now called a Golly or a Golly Dolly, not a Gollywog. The original golly was actually a good guy in fiction (not Blyton but there are a few authors with a lot to be desired in the PC stakes Roald Dahl being another). The term was hihacked later to make the term Wogs offensive. It started as meaing Working on the Government Services.

OP posts:
tethersend · 07/09/2011 19:51

Please read the link about the origin of gollywogs.

Jaquelinehyde · 07/09/2011 19:52

I would love to see you doing that Tethers!

However, you and I both know that the people of Brixton would not be offended by the golly side of the dressing up but by the fact that if you are white you would be doing what is referred to as blacking up which is highly offensive as I am sure you know.

I am right in assuming all you golly haters never let your dc's watch Tom and Jerry do you because that would be hypocrisy of the highest order surely?