to not let my 10 year old DD read Twilight?

[inatrance]

My 10 year old DD is a very keen reader and has read all Harry Potter, some Phillip Pullman etc and is now desperate to read Twilight.

My take on this has been a firm 'no' but earlier today in the library DD had her friend with her (who is 11) and kept on and on about it and that her friend had read it and I caved and let her take them out.

I still wasn't happy about it, my reasons being that I don't feel that books with a 'romantic' theme are suitable for a 10 year old and also that I feel that Twilight gives some seriously dodgy messages for a young girl about what 'love' is and isn't. I also think Edward is a controlling arse and that Stephanie Mayer ought to be shot for teaching a generation of teenage girls that love=control and that life without a boyfriend just isn't worth living. That's just for starters.

My DH agrees that Twilight is unsuitable reading for a child (he used to be a children's librarian) so we have decided that it's best that she doesn't read them.

However I read all sorts of stuff at her age and I'm worried that by banning it, it will take on even greater appeal. So I'm a bit torn.

DD still isn't speaking to me and thinks I'm being desperately unreasonable. Am I?

oh and yy to all the posters reading Lace, and Lucky at al. I sneak read them at 10/11. I also remember sneaking The Thorn Birds into school so we could read the 'dirty bits'. It was most disappointing. Hardly any :o

I agree with letting her read them and discussing the themes with her. She will read them anyway so better you're there to talk to and guide her conclusions. Then definitely try to steer her on to books with stronger female characters. Tamora Pierce books are particularly kick ass. I loved them at her age.

Tbh isn't it a bit late now? You've said she can, you can hardly change your mind (again).

Imho I don't see much harm in the book. Bella's not exactly a wimp, and becomes a very empowered woman by the end of the series.

I was a 'sneak' reader at that age. I remember reading a supposedly true vampire story that left me petrified to go to sleep for months! I also discovered Shaun Hudson, Virginia Andrews and Stephen King at about 10.

I would allow her to read them and be open to discussing the 'plot' otherwise you are setting up a 'forbidden fruit' situation. One of her friends will no doubt have a dog eared paperback of it that she can smuggle into the house in her school bag.

Lace was hardcore!!! the female circumcism, the abortion, the rape, the sex sex sex, and the goldfish! good clean stuff for a 10 year old!

I'd let her read them and discuss them with her.It sounds as though she already reads widely and will only learn how to discriminate if she has the experience of lots of different books.As for controlling males-what price Julian in The Famous Five?

Yes but there's a difference between reading about darker themes with a neutral or negative frame around those, and a book which completely romanticises a clearly abusive relationship.

She becomes empowered at the end? Are you reading a different book?

If her friend already has them/ has read them I bet any money first day back at school she?ll either have a copy or be on the list for one.

Tiffany Aching wouldn?t just dropkick Edward Cullen, she also make apologies to every woman he?d ever been in contact with and then clean the house and she?d have the Wee Free Men stalk him, HA!!

I'd let her read them. How can you stop her anyway? I used to borrow friends' books at school and read them in the lunch breaks.

The important thing though is that she reads and watches lots of other stuff as well so that she doesn't get just one impression of what teenage relationships are like.

Agree btw about Edward Cullen being controlling. But I think the more worrying thing is that he's about 300 years old and yet fancies a teenager...

I would have been surprised if I was the only sneak reader at 10yrs-so nice to know there were others. My mother banning it would have made it more appealing! I hope you have more luck discussing issues than me.My DCs just used to say, at 10yrs, rather pityingly 'it's only a story mum, you don't have to take it so seriously!' (they were boys though)

My mum hid Jilly Cooper novels in the top of her wardrobe, because I read everything I could find. Didn't stop me . I read Hollywood Wives (also pinched from the top of the wardrobe, and thought it was total shite in comparison to the rather more kick-ass Cooper. I would have been about 10 at the time. I still think Twilight is in a different league.

Smellslikecatpee has it spot-on with Tiffany Aching.

at other sneak readers. Actually, I remember reading a copy of Emanuelle that I found, age about 10... now that was, erm, educational

I let my 10 year old daughter read Twilight last week - she'd wanted to for a while, being the sort of kid who devours books and I didn't want to make it more tempting by making it forbidden fruit. I remember how gutted I was when my mum hid Forever by Judy Blume from me after reading a few pages. Twilight is fluff, I've read it, I don't think she'll be emotionally scarred by reading about wussy Bella. My 10yo is a mini goth who spends all her pocket money on bats and skulls. She'd have found a way to read Twiglet even if I'd banned it. She still prefers Harriet the Spy to Bella.

I don't have a 10 year old (yet) so can't really help on that, but just wanted to say how delighted I am to find other people who think that Bella is THE worst role model possible. I thought I was the only one. Can't abide Edward either, for just the reasons outlined in the OP.

I trawled through the whole series thinking it has to get better and Bella surely is going to find some backbone. It didn't and she didn't either.

I agree with minipie. I'm not looking forward to DD wanting to read Twilight(although hopefully they'll be out of print by then). I have read them but hated them - the bits with Jacob weren't quite so painful) . I would counter with Tiffany Aching, Sally Lockhart (by Philip Pullman - absolutely fantastic feminist adventure stories) and Buffy.

YANBU. Twilight is a pile of ridiculous bollocks.

OP, I feel your pain!
DD1 is just 9. She is currently re-reading the Harry Potter books, and is big into Michael Murpugo at the moment also. I am REALLY hoping she is older than 10 when she starts on any of the stuff with teenage romance.

But even so, if she was pushing to read it, I'd let her. I was another sneak reader. And I'd also introduce her to other writers, to keep some type of balance.

Oh FGS. Twilight is JUST a story,no matter how badly written. Edward is controlling because of the age he grew up in .That's what guys did back then. No different to reading a book in that era.

She will have time enough to dissect a bloody book when she does GCSE's and A levels.For now just be grateful she is reading, and stop putting such an adult stance on the story (which will go over your DD's head mostly).

Jeez Louise- it's thanks to people like JK Rowling and Stefanie Meyer that more kids are back in bookshops. I think it's great.

Ps-Not keen on Edward myself, much prefer Jacob Black and the hunky werewolves.

Sorry, Susanne, but an in-depth study showed that children's reading had continued to decline in the HP years, despite anecdotes - it's just that the ones who were still reading were mostly reading HP.

I'm keeping an eye on this thread for tips on my future reading.

I love books for kids/teenagers! And books that kids/teenagers shouldn't be reading but do!

I wouldn't want my 10 yo to read Twilight for all the reasons mentioned on this thread.

However I wouldn't prevent them - because as everyone else has said, it will only make them more attractive.

I would de-allure them by reading over her shoulder and loudly poking fun at the sparkly stalker shit {grin]. Who knows - she might even learn how to spot a controlling nutjob at 40 paces which has got to be a good thing, right?

I read some truly awful stuff at 11 or 12 - Flowers in the Attic being a prime example. But I didn't grow up thinking it was ok to shag near relatives and that sibling rape was the pinnacle of a girl's romantic attainment. In fact the spewsomeness probably helped form my proto-feminist leanings.

"Edward is controlling because of the age he grew up in .That's what guys did back then. No different to reading a book in that era."

Er, well yes but see it's written in THIS era. The normal thing to do when you're writing a book is defer to the cultural norms of the period it's set in and make some reference to that fact that, oo, let me see, stalking, imprisoning and committing breaking and entry to watch a girl you barely know sleep is NOT NORMAL OR DESIRABLE THESE DAYS.

It's not the fact that Edward does these things, it's the fact that he does them uncritiqued and that everyone, even the modern-day heroine, thinks that's just, yanno, what a boy does when he likes you. Right?

Why thank you Victor and bows but never never curtseys

Erm, in what historical era was it normal for young men to break into a woman's house and watch her sleep?

Surely if he were really influenced by C19th cultural norms, he would be too modest to enter a woman's bedroom, unless he were some sort of Cad?

Oh yes, Flowers in the Attic.

Now that was weird. Makes Twilight look positively wholesome.