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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

..to ask has anyone ever witnessed someone being outed on here??

155 replies

BoysRusxxx · 18/08/2011 21:00

Ive always wondered if anyone bitch of a SIL has ever replied to a thread about themselves???

I know it happened on a different mums forum i use.

Has anyone witnessed it on here??

OP posts:
ImperialBlether · 19/08/2011 18:47

I think the way some people here are talking about Xenia is really awful. It's bullying and bitchy.

JemimaMuddledUp · 19/08/2011 18:52

I haven't had a PM either - although I did say after realising that she wasn't actually famous that I didn't want one.

If she were some C list celebrity and it was common knowledge on MN then yes I would be interested to know who I was clashing with talking to online. But if she is just some ordinary woman with a business that I've never heard of on the other side of the country to me then it is pretty irrelevant and not remotely as interesting as people were making out.

doesthisseemright · 19/08/2011 19:01

You could out xenia to me and I would most likely not have the foggiest who she is

LineRunner · 19/08/2011 19:11

This is ridiculous. If you Google '[person's name] + Mumsnet' you get to a MN thread called 'Sorry, Xenia...'. Many deleted posts, of course, including the ones with the name in, presumably. But it's not very secure, is it?

WhoseGotMyEyebrows · 19/08/2011 20:20

Could some one please explain this to me. I feel like I am missing some big joke! Why would anyone think that xenia isn't real or anything? Don't get it.

SugarPasteFrog · 19/08/2011 20:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

cheeseandmarmitesandwich · 19/08/2011 20:57

rightly or wrongly this thread sparked my curiosity as I've had some run-ins with Xenia over her views on SAHMs (am a regular name-changer). I just spent 5 mins doing some very rudimentary googling based on widely known facts about her and I'm 99% sure I now know who she is! Not famous just clearly a very successful and inspirational woman in her field.

Still don't agree with her views but I was impressed with what she has achieved. If it's her. And I'm not telling!

ImperialBlether · 19/08/2011 22:06

Ooh I remember that one, SugarPasteFrog - the one where the woman felt left out. I remember thinking she would be feeling even more left out afterwards!

LRDTheFeministDragon · 20/08/2011 01:28

I've just come back to this, haven't been on all day.

I asked for a PM first so I just wanted to say - I thought people were saying Xenia had outed herself, like where you have one of those bits in the newspaper that there were loads of at election time with 'Mrs Jane Smith, a mum of three from Lancashire, says she started to use Mumsnet when blah blah, 'I post all about my life as Nickname and think the Doghouse has a strong impact on politics', says Jane'.

I figured it was perfectly ok to ask for a PM about that, and still do.

I still have no clue who Xenia is.

I've had a load of PMs so thought I'd say - no, I don't know who she is, and I don't believe anyone else has any more information either.

ImperialBlether · 20/08/2011 09:49

I was watching Big Brother last night (sorry, forced to!) and thought I'd bet a month's salary that Sally Bercow's a Mumsnetter. Anyone else think that?

soymama · 21/08/2011 13:12

@Imperialblether, I bet she is too!

TheOriginalFAB · 21/08/2011 13:38

I really don't warm to SB at all.

SugarPasteLadybird · 21/08/2011 14:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Lifeinlalaland · 21/08/2011 15:19

Well I wrote a post which unfortunately was seen by the person I wrote it about. It caused no end of trouble and I had to get the thread deleted and then cancel my mumsnet account and make a new one. :-(. I am also now a bit of a lurker and have only just started posting on here again!

Lifeinlalaland · 21/08/2011 15:20

Oh and the person it was about was not on mumsnet, I have no idea how she managed to find it, she said it came up in a search she did about the topic we were fighting over.

PinotsKittens · 21/08/2011 15:40

lalaland I bet she was a MNer! Despite her protestations. Ooh long word for a hangover day

LoopyLoopsTootyFroots · 21/08/2011 15:41

Not good, lala. :(

Helenagrace · 21/08/2011 16:16

My SIL is on here. I see her post reasonably often. She doesn't know who I am but she could probably work it out if she looked at my history.

I work in a very small field so I could be outed but it's a highly male dominated field so I doubt they're reading Mumsnet. I don't post anything professionally contentious for that reason. I use a different name on other forums so it reduces the risk of being traced elsewhere if outed on one.

I worked out who Xenia is from a five minute google session. She's an inspiring and successful lady.

MrsHicks · 21/08/2011 16:35

A friend alerted me to a post on here bitching about me, but I never said anything about it. It was pretty amusing if you knew the full story.

I have also told someone what their partner was saying about them on here. I figure that if you slag off your partner on a public forum where all your posts are indexed and saved by Google, then you can't really get upset when they find out - especially if you've done nothing to obscure your identity.

LoopyLoopsTootyFroots · 21/08/2011 16:40

Did you serve Pom Bear to your guests, Mrs H?

grumblinalong · 21/08/2011 17:03

There was one where a woman posted about her friend telling people she was pregnant before OP had even told her DH. It went mental, with other MN's saying 'calm down ladies, talk in RL' etc. The friend came on and said a whole manner of shit about the DH too.

It was years ago but will always stay with me...

WhoseGotMyEyebrows · 26/08/2011 11:21

where all your posts are indexed and saved by Google

WHAT!!!!!!!! [panic emoticon]

Lougle · 26/08/2011 11:32

I agree with those who are against outing. Xenia does have controversial views, and what makes them interesting is that they clearly are her views, not just 'forum hype' and exaggeration.

If anyone really wanted to find out her identity, they could, and I am sure she knows that. But for people to pass on that information via PM is not on.

I for one think that actually, regardless of whether you agree or disagree with her viewpoint, she is pretty inspiring. I have heard her speak, and she is very engaging.

MoominsAreScary · 26/08/2011 12:29

Don't know who she is, only came across her yesterday but her views on a thread about people being over weight and her comments that " noone ever came out of a concentration camp fat" did not impress me

BootyMum · 26/08/2011 12:34

Lougle then Xenia must be quite different in RL for her to be engaging and inspirational Confused

On here she comes across to me as a bigot with her views on SAHMs, immigrant workers, the only jobs worth doing are those that are extremely well paid...

We have clashed on those issues on other threads so I am not talking behind her back btw.