to think about putting a lock on our bedroom door?

[wisecamel]

With dcs of 10 and 8 and our bedroom door on their way to the bathroom, I find myself keeping half an eye on the door during rare moments of intimacy . Just telling them not to come in seems really creepy and bleugh and would probably make them more likely to sneak in anyway. BUT I have a fear of terrible accidents/fires/younameit disasters happening if we did this, or worse, their 'we know you locked the door last night' looks at breakfast. AIBU?

Surely you can do it once they're asleep?
Its not like they're 16 & 18!

Well, you wouldn't keep it locked all night, would you? You'd unlock it after you'd, erm, er, enjoyed one another's company

So it wouldn't be much of a fire hazard or problem, would it?

And if you would need it locked all night - I salute you.

shove the bedside table across the door

We've got a small bolt on the door for that reason, it works well for us, it's only drawn when needed iyswim.

When I was 8 years old, and my brother was 10, my dad fitted locks to all 3 bedroom doors - his and mum's too.

I thought it was a great idea, but as you are second-guessing just whether to put one on your own door, I shouldn't think you'll agree.

Re the fires and other disasters, what do you think could possibly happen in the ? Seconds it takes to draw back a bolt?!?!?! How hazardous is your house?! It's not like you have to go into details with your kids - just say it's there to give "me or Dad" some guaranteed privacy when we want it, if either of them question just tell them that if there's something so pressing, all they need to do is knock. Me and my brother knew that, no reason why your kids shouldn't.

TheMagnificent - no saluting necessary, unfortunately. Thanks OddBoots, I didn't know of anyone who had actually done it.

When my parents bought their house 30 years ago, the previous owners had put locks on the outside of their kids' doors, up high.

Never did work out why!

You should just make it clear that they do not enter your bedroom without knocking. That is common courtesy and they are old enough to respect that.

Meow75 you had a lock on your own bedroom door at 8? I'd be worried sick that DC would lock themselves in during an emergency...OK, so I'm just a worrier!

Locks up high on the outsides of doors was probably to deter burglars. They break in through a bedroom window, but then are stuck in the room unless they want to make a lot of noise trying to break through a door.

My parents had locks on all the doors which were at the back of the house, upstairs and downstairs, for that very reason.

SqueakyToy They were the only internal doors with locks, both upstairs, made no sense! I would have understood if all the doors had locks.

Actually, we also have a lock on the inside of our bedroom door.

Sadly, it was put there so that if one of us has an afternoon nap, the kids can't come in and leap on us (that way lies heart failure!), and not for any other reason.

Euphemia, did the rooms have windows though? I was talking about internal doors too. :)

DD peeks through the crack in our bedroom door to see if we're awake. Luckily for us, her bedframe squeaks so it acts as an early warning system.

We have a bolt on the door - it's fab - highly recommend

We have a bolt on the door - it's fab - highly recommend

Yes the rooms had windows. But the parents' bedroom door had no lock, and was as accessible to burglars as the other two. In any case, a burglar would have needed a ladder to get in that way; the easy way was apparently to jemmy the back door, which some cunts did last year when my parents were out for the evening.

Euphemia

I've just had to put locks high up on the outside of some doors to prevent DS with SN from getting into his siblings rooms and trashing them!

Maybe it was something like that - I never met the family. DB used to think it was funny to lock me in my room ...

My dad was a decorator, so there were always ladders in the garage or at the back of the house (so security was always an issue)... although the doors had locks built into them when they were put in the house in 1907, long before my parents were even born!

Sash windows too, which were probably a lot easier to get into than modern double glazing.

The front window was double-glazed, with locks on the inside, as there was a flat-roofed garage under it. No locks on the back window, which someone could have got in pretending to be a window cleaner.

In a way, my parents are lucky that's the first time they were burgled in 30 years: they're at the end of a row, backing onto a field. No neighbours or passers-by could have seen anyone at the back door.

It's like Fort Knox now, with everything they've had to put in place to satisfy the insurance company!

I don't see why you wouldn't have a lock on your door. But I have to say I am from Germany and we have locks on every door usually, so it might just be what I am used to. My mum took away my key till I was old enough.

I think every bedroom should have a lock, even for teenagers. Sometimes you want to be completely in the moment and not have to think about if someone forgets to knock. Sure they should but you can never be 100% sure they will.

Just unlock it when you are done? I agree that you shouldn't be locked in for emergency reasons, but I don't always follow that advise myself. I like to lock my door when I am home all alone, as we had a series of break ins lately.

We had a sliding latch, now we have a lock and key! YANBU at all, we've had far too many embarrassing interruptions!

Wise camel - it was only a piece of sliding metal bolt. At the age of 8, I was more than capable, and would even expect the most molly coddled 8 y o to be able to manage that. (I'm not suggesting that your child is such a Molly coddled weakling, btw)

And as for getting locked in during a rage - food and toilet are quite compelling reasons to emerge from a locked bedroom.

And a tantrumming child is best placed in their bedroom, locked or otherwise.

Both viewpoints gleaned from my parents.