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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To never leave my house again, never ever ever.

268 replies

Megatron · 05/08/2011 19:01

OK first of all can I just say that I am not some mentalist who normally does this kind of thing but both DC's are out for tea tonight so DH on our own.

DH has a habit of running through the house bare chested beating his chest shouting instructions (I know, I know). It's funny. Sometimes. So this evening I thought it would be hilarious if I did the same, so I duly stripped to the waist and ran downstairs into the living room waving my arms in the air shouting ....... to find DH sitting talking to the plumber who had kindly popped round to discuss the new central heating we are having installed.

I don't know which part of this whole debacle is the worst. The fact that DH just sat there with his gob wide open, the fact that I just kept running through to the kitchen then hid in the utility room until he was gone, the fact that this man is going to spend almost a week in my house shortly, or the fact that he lives directly across the road from me and his wife cuts my hair.

DH cannot look at me without pissing himself laughing and if he keeps this up I'm he's going to rupture something vital. Does anyone think there's the slightest chance that perhaps the plumber did not notice? Please?

OP posts:
mrstimlovejoy · 06/08/2011 09:11

had to read this thread again hilarious
think it will be todays topic of conversation whilst waiting for dd at her dance classes.certainly beats talking about bloody bun rings and next years show.

InTheNightKitchen · 06/08/2011 10:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

InTheNightKitchen · 06/08/2011 11:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AnneWiddecomesArse · 06/08/2011 12:36

Bless you megatron
Recovery will take some time.
I speak as someone who opened the door in just a towel to (I thought) my DH.
Holding a bowl of plums, vigorously singing "Get your gums around my plums"; whilst letting the towel slip, I had started gyrating and mad "dancing".
I found it was not my DH but my elderly (female) neighbour.

2old2beamum · 06/08/2011 12:48

please keep these coming I am pissing myself with laughter but will blame wet patch on sofa on age.

OneManBand · 06/08/2011 12:53

Megatron, what other things have you done? I'm curious...

Grin
Eloise73 · 06/08/2011 18:43

You are a LEGEND!!!! Thanks for making DH and I laugh so much, best story i've heard in ages :)

elmofan · 06/08/2011 19:12

Thanks for cheering me up megatron Grin I've had a crappy week and needed that laugh .

ThatVikRinA22 · 08/08/2011 14:43

i need to know.....have you ventured out yet?

LoveBeingAtHomeOnMyOwn · 08/08/2011 14:52

You know you have to offer him hob nobs with his brew don't you Grin

RalphGnu · 08/08/2011 14:54

Grin fab thread, just what I needed!

timetoask · 08/08/2011 15:01

I have not laughed this much for weeks!!! Thanks.
Chip up! Best thing is to book a hair cut straight away and act as if nothing had happened.

MissyBrookes · 08/08/2011 15:13

I wondered why this thread was so popular!!!!! I needed a good laugh, thank you :)

I'm not sure what i would do in your situation, probably just face your neighbours and see what happens.

WilsonFrickett · 08/08/2011 15:15

Hey OP we need an update. It's now Monday and surely surely you have left the house by now?

Grin at NightKitchen's explanations btw...

eurochick · 08/08/2011 15:16

This thread is wonderful!

stealthsquiggle · 08/08/2011 15:30

I think I might greet said plumber with "I'm just going out - shut the door behind you when you leave..." Grin

NoobyNoob · 08/08/2011 15:39

Fucking awesome

Megatron · 11/08/2011 16:56

Well I thought I should post an update on the er 'situation'. The central heating work almost finished and it has been excruciating being here whilst the work was done. Nothing has been mentioned. He had his 16 year old apprentice with him who was too petrified to look at me so I'm positive he was made aware of the situation, probably as a warning in case of any accidental nork flashing on my part. They'll be here one more day but fortunately DH is in tomorrow so I'm of out with the DCs, thank God. It's been truly horrible - I did try to man up on Tuesday and strike up a casual, chatty conversation but the poor man looked very nervous as if he didn't quite know what I was about to do, so there was a lot of 'right erm yes it is a lovely boiler' and 'um, lovely weather' etc so I just shuffled off.

Let this tale of horror be a lesson to you all.

OP posts:
Doobydoo · 11/08/2011 17:03

Grin I am laughing so much that is ilarious OP,just what I needed ....THANKYOUGrin

Doobydoo · 11/08/2011 17:03

HILARIOUS obv!

FriggFRIGG · 11/08/2011 17:07
Grin that update has just started me off again.....
Ephiny · 11/08/2011 17:19

AHAHAHAHAHAHA! I have just spent the last 5 minutes literally crying with suppressed laughter at my desk and people are looking at me strangely. I think I'm about to start again. How did I miss this on Friday!

It's not just the inappropriate toplesness, it's the sheer bizarre randomness of it. Hobnobs! Grin.

This has made my week. OP you have brightened up many people's lives with your ill-considered act of madness. Thank you!

Sariah · 11/08/2011 17:22

Great thread. I really lol at it and dont usually find threads very funny.

LucyGoose · 11/08/2011 17:30

This is almost as good as when the minicab driver walked into the flat and I was in the toilet (across from the front door) pulling my pants up - with the toilet door open.

He said he walked in because the front door was unlocked Shock

Have you ever heard of knocking mr mini cab driver?

lovemysleep · 11/08/2011 17:32

Oh, Megatron, you are a breath of fresh air.......pppphhhhhhnnnnaaarrrrrr!

Just take solace is the huge amount of smiles and laughter that you have generated - you are probably responsible for making all of us live just a little bit longer, due to the healing power of laughter.......

And may I just add that I think I love you too...