to wish that people would stop (mis)diagnosing themselves?

[AKMD]

Why do so many people diagnose themselves or their children with illnesses that they do not have? For example:

"Oh, I have asthma" = you are unfit and so get out of breath easily when you do have to run for that bus.

"I am allergic to broccoli" = you just don't like broccoli.

"I have a migraine" = you might have a headache but if you had a migraine you would be at home in bed with the curtains drawn, unable to attend this party.

"DS has ADHD" = your DS is spoiled to death, you set him no boundaries and so he runs riot.

Inevitably, when sympathised with and asked when they were diagnosed the reply is "Oh, I haven't seen the doctor about it, I just know." They have no idea what life is like for people who actually do have these conditions and their laziness and exaggeration make it incredibly difficult for real sufferers to be believed or accommodated for. It makes me so cross - AIBU?

'Were does the belief that Aspergers/ASD = Badly behaved child come from?'

From ignorant observation by people with no real understanding of what they are seeing.
Child in sensory overload goes into meltdown.
They see a temper tantrum from nowhere.
Child driven by an obsession and monologuing, they see a rude child who won't shut up.
Child with sensory issues over food and specific needs about what and how and where. They see a spoiled brat who is allowed to choose food.
Child with a Social Communication Disorder, they see a badly-behaved child.
There are about ten thousand other examples that I could give you.

DH suffers from migraine and I have done in the past. Mine were the classic needing to stay in a darkened room for several hours/days type, as diagnosed by a major London hospital having ruled out other causes first. DH, otoh, gets no headache at all with his. He sees sparkles and loses sight in one (usually) or both (rarely) eyes. We usually then trek to the local A&E so they can confirm it is not a detached retina, as the symptoms are so similar and then we come home whilst he waits for it to clear. He has never had a headache with his migraine, yet the medics are certain that this is what he has. So he could , in theory, be the person you meet at a party who tells you he has a migraine.

leonie people think I am lying when I say my son can't lie. I'm honestly not. In many ways it is a good behaviour disorder. If he is given boundary lines where he can go to, he will reach them and ask me if he can cross them as his mates have just gone beyond his boundary lines.

I many ways they are so much more straight forward as they see the rules and just obey them. If my son doesn't he has to "confess" straight away,

Ive got one of those too justabout !

So many ADHD traits but I havent chased a Dx. You know why?

I cannot be arsed to go through the 'mother trying to get another label for her child' thing. He has three already. I am not overly keen on collecting another. Its not a hobby.

Besides, by the time he got a referral, appt and assessment he would probably have been forced to slow down due to old age.

profession Applauds.

No balloonslayer, there is such a thing as mild flu. You can look it up if you don't believe me. :) Swine flu was an example - it hit some people hard, others had it mildly and a study in London showed that quite a high percentage of people had immunity to it without having any recollection of having it ie. Had it asymptomatically. Yes, flu can kill some people and can make others quite ill but not everyone.

My son is a dreadful liar. In that he lies a lot and is really dreadful at it.

He isnt tidy either.

Or a genius at anything eg. art, maths, memorising tube maps etc.

So according to lots of people he wouldnt really have ASD would he

I DO know someone who insists that her child is 'boardline albino' . But she is a bit bonkers and like the woman upthread has plenty of issues.

All her children have 'something'. I want to smack her quite often. I particularly wanted to smack her often when DD was very sick and all I wanted was a healthy child whilst she seemed to be wishing fervently for a sick one.

But, like I say, she is a bit bonkers and despite all her pushing and pushing she hasnt got very far in collecting official labels for her kids.

The first Mrs Devere

Unbelievable lies are classic ASD they just can't do it.

TIDY!!!!! ROFLMAO he is horrendously disorganised.

He can remember a whole load of stuff, registration plates, names weights of footballers etc.

I think that if the team of mental health experts at CAMHS have diagnosed him as autistic, after assessing for months, they'd be spot on.

I can in part see your point & yes when this genuinely happens it can sometimes rile me too

but as a diagnosed sufferer of the chronic version of one of your list, I can also see that you make assumptions not based in fact, which makes it harder for me to take your post that seriously - if you don't understand the reality of living with a particular illness, which I can see from my own experience with chronic migraine, you DON"T how can you know for sure that a person just isn't YET diagnosed & that you are in fact being very very uncharitable

Slightly different subject but one of my pet bugbears is people who sniffle then say they have flu. If they had flu they would not be wandering about spreading their germs around they would be at home in bed!

Timid, read my previous posts. :) It is possible to have a mild dose of flu.
Not that everyone who has a sniffle and says they have flu actually does, but just because someone is not home in bed does not necessarily mean they don't.

Also peoples tolerance for pain/illness varies massively so just because YOU can't function with Flu etc etc, doesn't mean another can't - I too don't like someone wandering around spreading Flu germs, but I know people can still function, I could with swine Flu & I regularly have to with Fibro Flu

I'm sure some can bumbleymummy but I think the feckwits who used to come in doing this when I worked in a pharmacy were suffering from nothing more than a cold and being terminally irritating! When you've spent weeks dealing with sniffling whingers you reach a point where anything less than ebola is undeserving of sympathy!

justaboutWILLfinishherthesis - I was asking this out of a serious desire to know the answer
Im sorry if my post seemed blunt and nasty, had the baby doing her own version of 60 minute makeover, with her crayolas, so did not type,perhaps the way I meant to

The reason I asked, my DS has Dyspraxia,he is showing signs of dyslexia, infact to the degree he is 8yo in a few weeks, and can only spell his first name, has no clue how to spell his surname, while other children his age are reading school reading books, DS is bringing home match up cards, with simple words on it, like, it, you, me, dog etc
My son has been tested in school by the senco, and they say he is not dyslexic

Having spoken to his consultant, he gave myself and DSs school a connor
questionnaire form, to help decide if DS has ADHD-PI, my son is not hyperactivity etc, is very very well behaved in fact.
Consultant explained to me there are 3 types of ADHD, 1, Being hyperactive .[which is ADHD] 2.Being inattentive, easily distracted, forgetful, with little or no hyperactivity 3. Both 1&2
This is all new learning to me, I have known DS had dyspraxia when he was 3yo [His consultant said he thought this, but does not dx until the child is 7yo]

Going to his last appt and finding out about possible ADHD-PI was a massive shock
No matter what, even though he has been tested, I really think there is a possibility he has dyslexia

Sorry Im rambling now, have not seen his consultant since March,so do not know the outcome of the connor questionnaire, we are waiting for another appt, Im left me in limbo a bit

Its left me in limbo a bit* sorry

I get a bit cross with (unvited) people trying to diagnose my DD
I have had somebody as me whether DD has "anything wrong with her". No, she's just a very energetic child who sometimes wants her own way and throws a strop when she doesn't get it.

She was with the childminder one day when the CM was at a group event, with different people talking. There was a speech therapist there, who insisted that the CM give a card to me to book an appointment for DD's "speech problem". Took her to an appointment and was nearly laughed out of the office as her speech is perfectly fine!

it's different when a parent asks for help, or advice, but when random people in the shops come across and ask questions/make suggestions, that's just odd!

"Oh, I have asthma" = you are unfit and so get out of breath easily when you do have to run for that bus.

Yeah, I know one of these. She's 50, and has apparently just developed "asthma". "Slow down, I have asthma", she says

No, she's unfit, and she's been smoking constantly since her teens, while insisting that smoking doesn't damage your health. Apparently "it's a cover-up organised by the car industry to blame pollution's effects on smoking".

I'm 29 and have just been diagnoised with asthma.
I didn't go to the doctors complaining of being out of breath when running for the bus. I went complaining about the cough I have had for two years. Doctor has told me that it is most likely asthma?!
I did have asthma as a kid, and had to have both types of inhalers. I was really poorly with it. But mum gave me some medicine for bronchitis and I hadn't had an asthma attack since!
I reckon I just have naff lungs. Whenever I get a cold/flu, it takes forever to shift off my chest.

dd most likely has autism or something like that.
it is obvious she has something.
but as she already has a dx for severe cp, U have never followed it up