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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think Oxfam should have given me the book for free

27 replies

NoelEdmundshair · 22/07/2011 14:25

Yesterday DD selected some books to donate to the Oxfam bookshop. Come bedtime we realised that I had accidently given away a book that she wanted to keep. So we went to the shop to retrieve it, explained the situation to the volunteer who promtly charged me £2 to get back the book we'd just donated Shock

AIBU to think they should have given a little girl her book back for free?

OP posts:
Sn0wflake · 22/07/2011 14:28

Think it sounds pretty mean....but you have donated to charity so try not to feel too bitter.

YellowDinosaur · 22/07/2011 14:28

YABU. Anyone could say what you have expecting to get something for nothing - how are they to know you donated this specific book?

Are you really so skint that you begrudge £2 for charity?Hmm

Sn0wflake · 22/07/2011 14:30

Come in she donated the day before....it is mean of them.

iwanttoseethezoo · 22/07/2011 14:30

No, YANBU, but i also see their side of it... perhaps they should've halved the price or something. People do make mistakes, but presumably you couldn't prove that you'd taken that book in.

Sn0wflake · 22/07/2011 14:31

It's not a great advert for them....they need people like NEH's good will for further donations and that is not the right way to go about it.

janelikesjam · 22/07/2011 14:31

YANBU, what a cow/jerk. Unfortunately (dare I say this!) alot of charity shops are staffed by "Jobsworth".

As a consequence, I can't really stand most of them. I only donate stuff so that other people can benefit. Usually I grit my teeth if I have to deal with "staff".

janelikesjam · 22/07/2011 14:33

She couldn't "prove" it - what is this, the High Court????!!! Would someone really make up such a story! How about some common humanity (it is, er, a charity shop). People are getting more and more lost in rules in our society and as a result they can't see the woods for the trees ...

GandTiceandaslice · 22/07/2011 14:33

It was a childs book. What utter gits. They should have given it back.
As a gesture I would have given them some money as I would have felt guilty though!

AbbyAbsinthe · 22/07/2011 14:34

Hold on a minute - the OP had already donated to charity by giving the books in the first place Hmm

And never mind your "Are you really so skint that you begrudge £2 for charity? Hmm " How. Rude.

Original poster
NoelEdmundshair · 22/07/2011 14:34

They hadn't put all the books out yet so DD asked if they had it and the volunteer found it, already priced up, under the desk waiting to be put on the shelves. So it wasn't a matter of DD picking up a book and me saying "oh yes - that's one we donated yesterday!"

OP posts:
YellowDinosaur · 22/07/2011 14:37

Unless it was the same volunteer who took the donation how do they know she donated the book? While it would indeed be a nice gesture to give the book back I don't think it is at all reasonable to expect the charity shop to do this.

janelikesjam I find your attitude pretty aggressive and unpleasant and if i was working in a charity shop (I don't) and you came in shouting jobsworth and with your sense of entitlement I certainly would charge you for the book!!!! Not a nice attitude about people who are giving their time for nothing to help raise money for charity

BootyMum · 22/07/2011 14:37

Also feel this is bad form and not a good example of customer service.

Agree with poster above who said that charities rely on people's goodwill towards them when they decide who to donate their items to.

They could have at least given you the benefit of a doubt, it's not as if they are losing money on the book, it was donated.

If this was me I wouldn't donate again to Oxfam. Maybe that's unkind of me but that's how I would feel.

Anyway I also feel that Oxfam is overpriced and is staffed with jobsworths [my local ones are anyway]. I always donate to [and shop at] my lovely local Red Cross Shop. They price fairly [not too expensive but also not ridiculously cheap] and the ladies who run it are friendly and smiley.

YellowDinosaur · 22/07/2011 14:39

OK I accept my 'Are you already so skint...' comment was rude. Sorry for that OP.

Still think you can't really expect to get the book back for nothing but looks like I am the only one - thats life I guess

Original poster
NoelEdmundshair · 22/07/2011 14:41

It's OK, YellowD.

OP posts:
GandTiceandaslice · 22/07/2011 14:43

YellowDinosaur, the book wasn't out on display yet, so how would have the op knew the book of that title was there to go & try & get it for free? I'm not sure there are many people out there trying to scam a charity shop out of childrens books! Grin

YellowDinosaur · 22/07/2011 14:43

And actually in the scenario the OP has now described where the book wasn't out I would have given it back for free. In the OPs situation though I would have also paid the price on the cover to get it back given that it had already been marked up even if they didn't ask for it.

YellowDinosaur · 22/07/2011 14:45

cross posted G&T - but when I posted my YABU the OP hadn't said that it wasn't on display.

I think I am coming accross more pissy than intended since this isn't really something I feel that strongly about! It would have been a nice gesture to give it for free but I don't think it should be expected. Think I'll go now...

janelikesjam · 22/07/2011 14:45

Yellow Dinosaur, maybe its not nice, but OPs experience has been mine and your attitude seems to echo this too!

BTW its not nice either to refuse to return a children's book especially when the OP has donated presumably lots of other stuff.

Just petty. But not atypical in my experience.

pictish · 22/07/2011 14:47

Yanbu! How petty of them!

GandTiceandaslice · 22/07/2011 14:47

ahh don't go YellowD, it wouldn't be AIBU with everyone agreeing!

GColdtimer · 22/07/2011 14:50

Yanbu but then I vowed never to give to them again after I did some publicity work for their publishing arm a couple of years ago. The amount of money they waste with their red tape and endless committees is shocking so I am not entirely objective.

amicissima · 22/07/2011 14:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BootyMum · 22/07/2011 14:57

Twofalls this is what always concerns me about giving to charity - how much of the revenue raised actually gets through to the people who need it?

I realise there are always administration and staffing costs... But if I am donating money I want to feel it is being used to help people, not for "red tape and endless committees"

There is another thread on here at the moment encouraging MNers to give to the appeal for drought in East Africa. Now at the moment I genuinely can't give anything as am already committed to other charities.

But I just wonder really how much of the thousands and millions raised will actually go towards making a difference to those starving and how much will be tied up in bureaucratic red tape and committees?

Sorry, hijacked thread a bit there Blush

lockets · 22/07/2011 14:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SevenAgainstThebes · 22/07/2011 15:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.