to think that if you tell someone that your child is vegetarian...

[Tollund]

that they should respect this and not then try to feed them meat?!

At a birthday party with DS1 who is four and a parent there offered my DS a sausage. DS took one (as he didn't know is it was veggie or not) and I politely said to the man "thank you, but he's vegetarian."

He said "yes, I know, they told me that. But I thought I'd see if he wanted one, and he took one, so let him have it."

I ignored him and told DS not to eat it.

THe man then started on at me about how I should let him make his own choices and to let him eat it which I refused to be drawn into, politely telling him no and then walking away.

He then went up to the mother of the child whose party it was (about 10 feet away from me) and starts banging on about me not letting him eat meat!

I think this man was monumentally ignorant - why does he think he is in a position to make food choices for my four year old child? What if DS was Jewish? Or had allergies? I'm now loathe to let my DS anywhere near this man's child or to go to parties where this man might be - IABU? (I don't think I'm BU in terms of making dietary decisions for my son at this time in his life, but whether am BU in wanting to keep my DS very far away from that tool!)

sausages, are you so insecure in your own choices that you perceive criticism in the way other people choose to live? Or are you so arrogant that you believe only your choices are the right ones?

?????? How very strange..........

sausagesandmarmelade I think some of you lot could do with a good steak inside you....I made a delicious one the other day (organic mind) with cream, brandy and mushroom sauce....full of iron and first class protein. Perfect! A lot of vegetarians I know....are quite hypocritical, extremist and don't like humans very much!

What the hell are you talking about? What strange sweeping statements!

You are an incredibly narrow minded person. What a tiny little world you must live in.

MsTeak. I asked how you could have a Jewish child. Not so much a moron. More someone that wouldn't label a child with a religion no more than I would label them Tory.

bunbaker I think it boils down to how strong that belief is.

Sausages if you eat steak like that often you're a heart attack waiting to happen. My iron levels are perfectly healthy thank you, and my intake of sat fat is minimal.

A nutcase planet???? a nutcase??? for offering a child a sausage at a party????

I am not vegetarian, and I thnk the man was v rude, interfereing, and if he thought YOU had no business having a say in what your DS eats, I don't know where the hell he got the idea that HE could decide what your child eats!!

It is also not other people's business to quiz people about why they are veggie, and certainly not to decide whether their reason is valid or not! Why is 'religious' OK as a reason and 'ethical or ecological' choice not?

4 year olds live as their parents bring them up and can make up their own minds as they grow. My friend is veggie, I respected her choice when her child came for tea, now he is 10 he has decided to eat meat, she is fine with that so I feed him meat.

Oh but I don't headfirst....I very rarely eat red meat.

But I do have problems with anaemia so try and keep my iron levels up.

Once upon a time I went vegan for a while (as I wanted to bring my cholesterol down). I ended up quite seriously defficient in vitamin B12....so now make sure I get enough.

I would never criticise anyone for feeding their dc meat, but have had to put up with criticism for not eating it. How does that make me a nasty human hater?

If your child gets older and decides he wants to eat meat will you stop him?

Your husband is not vegetarian, so why do YOU get to force your beliefs onto your child.

I think a child should make up their own mind about being a veggie or not when they are old enough to understand the reasons for and against it. That said, nobody should try to overrule whatever choices a parent has made regarding their child so whilst I would not have made the same choice as you regarding your child's diet, YANBU to think the guy was a moron for not respecting that choice once it was made. The guy was a rude prick and if I were you I would definitely keep my distance from now on.

then your clearly have little understanding of what the word Jewish means. Its not just a religion, its a cultural and ethnic background, and asking how one can have a jewish kid is a bit like asking how one can have a black child.

OP, YANBU.

Meat-eaters: YABU! :)

squeakytoy - why should her husband get to force his views? ? Because they are the majority views?

Squeakytoy Your husband is not vegetarian, so why do YOU get to force your beliefs onto your child.

What's that got to do with it? The OP and her husband have obviously made the decision so there is nothing more to discuss there.

I was once at a toddler Christmas party.
A little girl was tucking into a sausage.
Her mum shrieked 'NO!!!' and literally forced the little girls mouth open and took out the chewed sausage.
It was awful to watch.

The mum looked a total Pratt.

Oh with the "how strong the belief is post" I meant to add I know parents that won't allow their child to consume drinks containing aspartame, or haribo style sweets, even outside the home. Their choice!

I think serving veggie food only at home is fine, but not letting him have a sausage at a party is OTT, unless he is allergic to meat. That said I think the other parent was being a bit unreasonable too to go on about it.

I did lunchboxes for the kids at DD1's party and was aware of any dietary requirements, so I wouldn't have put in meat if anyone had been vegetarian. But if food is on platters it's normal to offer it around and usually at such parties you wouldn't necessarily remember who requires what.

Not a nutcase for offering a child a sausage (looks like he didn't know the parents' wishes at this point) but a nutcase, yes, for continuing to insist once he did know, and for trying to give the child a choice that contradicted his parents' wishes, and for "banging on about me not letting him eat meat". Never yet heard of a child damaged either physically or emotionally by not eating meat.

it can be turned around any way you look at it, as all parents impose there beliefs on there children, be it to eat meat or be meat free but until the child can make a discussion of there own on an informed basis it is up to the parents, and that should be respected.

marge2 I think a child should make up their own mind about being a veggie or not when they are old enough to understand the reasons for and against it.

By which time they will have been eating meat for years and years even though their parents belive it to be ethically/morally wrong or bad for their childs health.

Would YOU bring up your child to do something that YOU are so strongly against? Would YOU bring up your child to eat something that you believe might kill them one day or that goes against your morals? Of course you wouldn't, these are the choices we make for our children.

Perhaps we should let babies drink coke and smoke until they are old enough to decide it's bad for them . . . no?

whosegotmyeyebrows said...

Heart attack, stroke, CJD, cancer . . . you have so much to look forward to! I wonder if narrowmindedness can kill you?!

Now that is really SICK....are you seriously saying that veggies can't have any of the above?
You have over-stepped the mark!

Bradfordmum If your toddler was chomping on say, a tasty slug, wouldn't your reaction be the same?

To some people meat is vile, they wouldn't contemplate putting meat in their mouth, and most parents I know if they find something repulsive would be horrified to find their toddler eating it.

I think slugs are gross btw, but I'm sure they are a harmless source of protein?

Why do people get so wound up when the issue is meat?

Because they are narrow minded? Because they are afraid? Because they know they don't have the intelligence/moral backbone to make such a decision themselves?