To want to go swimming on my own in a non-lifeguarded pool

[Oopsie]

I'm pregnant, in my second trimester. A friend has offered me use of his private pool. I'd like to use it this afternoon but DH is not happy about me going on my own, just in case I have an accident or something with no lifeguard there to save me. He'd prefer me only to go at weekends when he is available to supervise me.

AIBU?

I don't think either of you are BU. I can completely understand you wanting to do it, but equally understand him wanting to make sure that his wife and unborn baby are safe.

Not that that helps at all!

I am with your DH - sorry- if you are the only person in the house/ at the pool. If your friend is there that's different.

I swim most mornings in a non-lifeguarded pool. Are you a good swimmer? Are you really going to swim lengths or is it more of a cool off and taking the weight off your feet / bump? Would your DH be OK if you just "wallowed" with your feet on the bottom? Is there a very deep end in the pool?

I don't think yabu but expectant dads can be over-protective.

Are you allowed to be in your house by yourself? With stairs?

YANBU, provided you're a good swimmer and sensible.

What Grimma said

How confident are you in the water? How confident is your DH? If he's a less enthusiastic swimmer than you, I can see why he might be worried. However, if you have full confidence in your abilities, give him a gentle pat, tell him you appreciate his concern and go for a a swim.

I agree with Grimma too.

There is a risk in everything we do.

What does he think would happen to you?

Are you a competent swimmer? Is the pool deeper that you are tall? Are you prone to fainting or other health issues?

A pool all to myself sounds heavenly. Kiss your friend on the cheek and say "Yes please, kind friend"

Are you intending to drive to get to this pool? You're more likely to come to harm in the car than in the water.

Are there sharks in this pool?

Aarf at Grimma.

Beware of diving in when pregnant. I once dived into the deep end of a pool when six months pregnant. I sort of barrelled down into the water and then popped straight to the surface like a jet-propelled buoy. Very weird sensation (baby didn't seem to notice btw ).

Thanks all. As acatcalledbob says, it's mainly just so that I can waddle about and take the weight off my feet and bump. I don't imagine I'll do much actual swimming.

DH is worried I could faint (which I have done once ever about 25 years ago) or hit my head and drown.

Lashings, I definitely won't be diving. I hate diving at the best of times.

TBH I would laugh my head off if anyone told me I couldn't do anything without being "supervised"

I don't think anyone should swim alone, pregnancy has nothing to do with it (although you may be more prone to actually fainting whilst pregnant I know several people who have). So yabu, not dh

Seriously? Do adults really not go swimming alone? Adults need supervision now? Really?

currybaby, the op's dh, has said he would prefer she not and that he isn't happy about something. Is your dh not even allowed to state a preference regarding your pregnacy?

Of course he is allowed to express a preference Lola. And I am allowed to laugh at it

Well he would be allowed to except we've been separated for 4 years and he'd probably preferred I drowned so he could collect on the insurance :o

If you're just going for a waddle, can I recommend you get a 'noodle'? I first came across them in aquanatal classes and they're lovely. And make it even safer.

Or you could bob around in a lifejacket...

arf curry

Well laughing at ex husbands is different, obviously.

We were on holiday when I found out I was pg for the first time, I had been waiting all week to get on this hammock that always seemed to be full of love birds, when the day I find out it comes free. I go to get in hammock and DH had a tantrum like I had never seen before, you can't get in a hammock! You'll fall out and misscarry, I tried gently explaining that it was 2 feet off the floor, but in the end my fear that dh would faint on the spot if I got in the hammock outweighed my actual urge to get in.

Sometimes I think the kind is thing is to make a few exceptions in your pregnancy, it must be really hard to be the non pregnant one. You have no control over the situation, but you still have the same desperate hope for a happy outcome. I'd hate it.

So people who have pools never use them if they are the only one in the house?

Extraordinary!

OP-it´s up to you if you feel safe doing it.

I sometimes have a glass of wine, while having an evening swim. I like to live dangerously.

Well while you gently explain Lola, I would just laugh ;)

And do what I wanted anyway :o

Damn winky smiley damn thing

Where else in the whole fucking wide internet does typing ;) not give you a ?!?

Gosh. I take my two young children swimming all the time in our deep pool by myself. And I take them to the beach by myself.