to think it is just not necessary to have a dining table anymore?

[LDNmummy]

Traditionally it has always been the look of a good home to have a dining table, preferably with its own area/ room in a house for family gatherings.

But, with modern life as it is, I just don't think it is necessary to have one anymore, unless of course you genuinely use it at least once a week. But do most families anymore?

I don't know many families who still go through the process of sitting around the dining table every weekend let alone every day, possibly for the fact that it is a little extra effort people are not as formal about anymore and sitting together doesn't have to be around a table but even just in the living room watching the telly together IYSWIM.

Plus, houses are not always big enough to accomodate a large family sized table and some may just feel it isnt worth the hassle to cram one in.

I also think this about the large cabinets that traditionally housed all a households fine dining wear that would come out on special occasions.

Aren't these bulky pieces of furniture that take up lots of space and are rarely used outdated now except with older people?

My MIL has a six seater table in the living room that could easily fit eight diners but is used properly about once a year. Half the reason for that is that it is too big and has to be crammed against a wall so isnt convenient to sit around daily or even weekly anyway. She also has a very large display cabinet full of her best dining wear wich is only used when special guests such as family travelling from abroad are visiting, which is rarely.

She is about 60 and in her eyes these two items of furniture are essential to beautify a home as well as for practical reasons, which IMO is questionable. My DM and all the older women in my family feel the same way.

But isnt this just all outdated and unecessary faff a house can do without in a time when people are no longer as formal when it comes to situations such as dining?

Another practical advantage of having a table is wrapping prezzies when your LO (congratulations)has a birthday / gets invited to birthday parties /mothers's day (naturally) etc. So much easier with a table.

we use ours every day, though just for breakfast during the week. we use it for family meals at the weekend and dd1 and 2 use it for drawing, doing craft stuff etc too

we acquired dh's granny's old table a few years ago-the sides fold down so it doesn't take up too much space. we usually just have one side up unless we have people over for a meal.

I don't think you need a dining room with a big dining table and a sideboard or anything, but I do think that every family ought to have a table to eat at. I think its very important for children to learn to sit at a table properly and how to behave at a table too.

Its unfair to expect children to be able to sit and eat nicely at a table at a restaurant, at a family event or even when they start school if they have never been taught how to do it and shown what the expectations of them are at a table.

We have a kitchen table and we all sit together at it for breakfast, the DC sat on highchairs/booster seats, and I eat at the table with them again at lunch and they have dinner there again later on.
In the evening, DH and I eat we always sit at the table to eat, unless its takeaway (for some reason we always eat that on the living room floor ).

We used to have a studio flat and had to eat always on our knees on the sofa bed, when we could afford to buy our first house we said we'd always sit at the table to eat, we'd missed it so much whilst in the studio flat.

but where would you put your fruit bowl?
where would your dc's do their homework?
where would you draw/paint/ do other crafts?
where would you put the condiments?
how would your dc's learn table manners?
where would you spread out all your paperwork?
where would you wrap presents?
how on earth would you manage to help yourselves to food? surely you don't plate it up - people need to choose for themselves?

I don't understand.

I'd rather have a dining table then a sofa - it's the hub of the family.

Thank you to Chaz and others who congratulated on the LO. Obviously there are still things about parenting I haven't factored in so glad for the advice about this

I hadn't thought ahead about how much my LO would require the use of a table, can only imagine a new born at the moment, not a little person who needs to use a table yet so hadn't accounted for those things.

YABU, we use our table every day for both breakfast and our evening meal, also board games, crafts etc. I wouldn't have one just to 'beautify' my home though.

Goodluck in teaching your 6 year old how to use chopsticks if they balancing everything on their laps.

How many people are in your household? If only 2 or 3 and you don't entertain much at home then, no, you probably won't use a table much. But when you are a family of 4 or 5, then the table helps creates a focus to mealtimes. As well as having other uses. And I suspect that it will be challenging to teach your children table manners without a table.

LovelyDaffs

The kitchen.
The home office.
The home office again (though now realising how much others feel the dining space is better equipped for this).
The kitchen cupboard and fridge.
Hadn't thought that far ahead as haven't had LO yet.
Home office.
Home office.
The kitchen (everyone plates up for themselves the same way as on a table).

A couple of people mentione ready meals earlier but actually the hub of my home is my kitchen as much cooking goes on so most people congregate there funnily enough.

And what about the postman? What about when he rings twice? Where will you cavort?

I work as a foster carer. The one comment that comes up time and time again in reviews (especially from older children) is how much they love eating together with the family. They love that sense of everyone coming together during a busy day to chat and swop stories of their day. It is impossible to do that with a TV blaring in the background.
So if you have the space, I would completely disagree with the op and say the dining table is actually one of the most important pieces of furniture in a home.

YABU - it's essential for us to sit down as a family at the end of the day, eat dinner together, and have a chat.

We will always have dinner at the dining room table, end of.

Ladymuck I have already mentioned several times that I admittedly hadn't thought that far ahead as I can only picture my LO as a new born right now and hadn't factored in the requirements of a little person yet. Of course I would have realised that when the time came, just hadn't thought of it now obviously.

Please read my posts before commenting.

@ Hullygully

If modern living means eating on a sofa round the tv, I'll stick with 1932 thanks. It's not good for your digestion, your table manners (obviously) or your furniture. We have a separate dining room as there is no space in the kitchen for a table - I'll bet our house is smaller than yours - but it also houses the desktop pc, the piano and a couple of huge bookcases. We don't just use it for eating and and nothing else. We use the table three times a day, every day. I see no hardship or formality in that. It's just where we eat, the same as the bed are where we sleep. We could all sleep on the sofa/in the bath etc but it's not necessary or desirable.

A lot of people are saying that not having children makes all the difference...but it doesn't for me and DH.

Even when the kids are out, we still eat together at the dining table.

When I'm alone I eat my lunch there and read the newspaper at the same time.

Not read all of this but we use our dining room table every day.
Have you ever heard the saying, the family that eats together, keeps together. Family dining is a vital time for all to reconnect and chat, bond etc.

YABU - like everyone says - where do you eat??

YAnBU about the dining table but YABU about not sitting eating together. We've long since converted our Dining Room to a Family room (sofa, TV, Computer etc..), but whenever possible, we sit round the kitchen tables for meals, not every day, but about 8 times a week. (twice at weekends, not on Guides night).

LDN I was talking about this with my mate the other day, she grew up without a dinner table and used to come round ours and love sitting around talking/eating around the table.

(I loved going around to eat at hers in front of the tv but would have hated it for every meal).

She now has kids and always eats around a table, she spouted off loads of reasons including some studies that she had found about how kids that eat with others are less fussy eaters, have far better language skills by the time theyn reach school age and some other stuff I've forgotten.

I think it is so wonderful to all sit down together a couple of times a day and talk as a family, time goes so fast and if you don't do it when they are little it only gets harder.

"hadn't factored in the requirements of a little person yet".

Well you're in the right place to learn! When did you last have a toddler in your home out of interest? Or a 5 year old? I'd borrow one now to help you get over the shock.

We sit at the table for dinner together most days when DD (9y) doesn't have an activity. As soon as she was big enough to sit in her highchair - so 5m in our case - she sat at the table with us for meals. We deliberately chose a Tripp trapp highchair that could be used at a table without a tray.

We always sit at the table when we have visitors which is at least once a week.

DD always sits at the table when she has playdates, etc too. TBH it is unusual for DD to not eat at the table.

We have two tables:

A small one in the kitchen with 3 stools which we use day to day or if DD is eatign with friends or on her own.

A larget table in the living/diner - we use it whenever we have visitors or for bigger meals, esp if we have serving dishes out.

Please Please Please read my posts, we do eat together, just not at the large dining table.

And I already mentioned our family activities etc..

we have a large six seat dining tanle and we use it every day, maybe not all at once but certainly all 4 kids use it togetheer most days

Who is your family at present, if you don't yet have dc? Just you and dp?

I wish I could afford somewhere big enough to be able to have a dining table!
I imagine when we have kids it'll just be a case of a single folding table for them to use.