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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want to focus on sex all the time?

101 replies

LoweredBrows · 22/06/2011 13:29

I suppose he's just like most men really but DP seems to focus on sex all the time. We don't live together and he seems to think that everytime we do see each other we need to be straight up to the bedroom.

I was talking to him on facebook last night and he started on about sex again. I changed the subject, started talking about cooking (we both enjoy cooking so it's not a girly topic to us) and he started saying I could work off what I've eaten on thursday (when he comes to my house) Hmm it's like everything comes back down to sex. I changed the subject again and every few minutes he sent me pictures of slutty outfits on ebay that he wants to buy me. It must have been pretty obvious I didn't want to talk about sex etc last night since I changed the subject EVERY time??

I'm starting to feel a bit like my main function for him is sex. AIBU?

OP posts:
valiumredhead · 22/06/2011 13:31

How long have you been with him?

Original poster
LoweredBrows · 22/06/2011 13:32

He's coming to my house tomorow and stupidly, in an effort to get out of sex last Sunday (I just wasn't in the mood and tbh was sore anyway since we'd had sex 4 times on the saturday!) I said "I'll be feeling better by thursday" so now of course he's under the impression that sex is on the menu tomorow. I just want him to come down and us to spend a bit of time together, go for lunch etc but to him it's all about sex and I'm finding it really offputting. Although he is taking me out to lunch tomorow but is still expecting sex before we go. I'm even considering purposely forgetting my pill but why should I have to play stupid games like this?

OP posts:
controlpantsandgladrags · 22/06/2011 13:33

If you want to stay with him you need to talk to him about it. Tell him that you don't want the relationship to be just about sex and see what he says.

Original poster
LoweredBrows · 22/06/2011 13:34

Been together about 2 years.

OP posts:
EricNorthmansMistress · 22/06/2011 13:35

He sounds annoying.

BitOfFun · 22/06/2011 13:37

The is the weirdo who won't let you into his house, yes?

Dump him.

Original poster
LoweredBrows · 22/06/2011 13:38

I went to his house for an hour yesterday and he's literally all over me sniffing me etc and saying my "smell" drives him wild. I used to find it funny but it's really starting to grate on me. It's like being around a humping dog. Even his texts are quite rude.

He never used to be like this, he goes through stages of it but at the moment it really is terrible, it's everytime I talk to him.

OP posts:
Aworryingtrend · 22/06/2011 13:38

Cocklodger.

Him, not you.

Pumpernickel10 · 22/06/2011 13:38

I remember this one from last week

Hammy02 · 22/06/2011 13:38

What happened with the not being able to visit his house unannounced? Is that now resolved? I can't find the thread.

themildmanneredjanitor · 22/06/2011 13:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Pumpernickel10 · 22/06/2011 13:39

You talk to your partner on fb? jeez
You was on here last week dear I remember you as he never let you come round his house uninvited

Original poster
LoweredBrows · 22/06/2011 13:40

yeah it was resolved, I got my friend to pose as an avon woman, there was nobody else there, the house was just a bit messy. I was at his house yesterday.

OP posts:
Ragwort · 22/06/2011 13:40

Does he have any good points?

BitOfFun · 22/06/2011 13:40

There's this revolutionary new treatment which really helps when one person is pestering constantly for sex, or being evasive about things. It's called Having A Grown-Up Conversation.

Original poster
LoweredBrows · 22/06/2011 13:41

I've tried that BOF, he stops it for so long and then it starts up again.

OP posts:
Pumpernickel10 · 22/06/2011 13:44

He sounds like a loser to me,conducting a relationship on FB is fucking childish.
Where is it going? no where no doubt and you had to spy on him too.

BitOfFun · 22/06/2011 13:44

So why are you with him? Where is this going? Last you moved in with him, he moved out, right? And his family think you've broken up. Just what are you getting out of this relationship?

Pumpernickel10 · 22/06/2011 13:44

This bloke is a keeper can I have one

Pumpernickel10 · 22/06/2011 13:45

BOF don't you remember her from last week,hes such a catch!

Original poster
LoweredBrows · 22/06/2011 13:47

Well I don't know about his family because he was going to visit his dad on father's day and I said I was going with him and he was fine with it. Unless he knew deep down I wouldn't really go?
As for where it's going, I really don't know. When we're together and he's not acting like a sex-starved dog he's great. We have a laugh, we want the same things out of life, have the same ambition etc but other times I find myself sitting here thinking "what a fucking farce, find a way to end it".

I agree about facebook btw but it's the only way we get to talk to each other other than texts.

OP posts:
Ragwort · 22/06/2011 13:47

Seriously Lowered - why do you stay with this dick man?

themildmanneredjanitor · 22/06/2011 13:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Ragwort · 22/06/2011 13:49

I am obviously very old fashioned but if my 'lover' couldn't be bothered to talk to me apart from via facebook or text messages there is no way I would stay in a relationship with him.

Show some self-respect and ditch him.

dreamingbohemian · 22/06/2011 13:49

I'm sure we can help you find a way to end it Smile