to be annoyed that I am "difficult", my partner is "laid back and lovely" and yet I am the one to be sorting out this latest shit he's got us into.

[CRS]

And breathe.

So what's going on? Can't really say if YABU or not on that little information. Go on, vent away...

Partner thinks it might be "difficult" to have a frank conversation with the garage owner (and friend of his mum's) about the car that just blew up after 8 weeks of ownership.I will not find this conversation difficult, have strong views, and will have to take an hour out of work to discuss it, as partner so bloody weak and eager to please. Breathes again.

"well you sort it out" is becoming wearing. I can't even bloody drive!

I know that one CRS. My dp lost his job quite recently through his own idiocy and everyone said 'awwwwwwwww poor mr BrawToken'. Really fecking annoying as I had to up my hours to ft at work despite us agreeing I'd be pt until dd2 was 2. And he's shit with money, but he's 'such a good laugh', 'so laid back' etcetcetc. VERY annoying

I do love him, though; he's a brilliant Dad/Stepdad and really good around the house and a really good laugh

Oh, I see. He's spineless.

See, I'm glad it's not just me, BrawToken. My man is that most annoying of things - adorable to everyone else.

I would have him any other way.

SO. WOULD. I.

Oh dear, how maddening.

RAC man today instinctively talked to me.

If ONE MORE PERSON tells me how lovely the fucker is, I will scream.

For "laid back" read "useless"

It really fecking annoys me when people use this as an excuse for being a spineless waste of space. I am laid back. Not much gets to me (irl that is, not necc on MN!), I just really dont see the point in getting wound up about things I cant do anything about, its a waste of energy and time. However, that is not to say that I wont fight my/our corner when needs be. I can stand up for myself and my family when needed and I do, I dont expect my less laid back DH to do it for me. In fact if anything he turns to me to deal with things because he tends to get angry and then struggles to make a coherent argument, whereas because I stay calm I can deal with problems much better than he can.

This is a classic case of a man who needs to grow a pair, so no YANBU at all!

Thank you. If anyone is interested in a lovely man who will make you feel great, look after your kids, and be completely gorgeous (whilst totally messing up your practical home life), do let me know.

Oh, and he'll fuck your collective finances too.

I get that too. I am quite 'commanding' generally. And I want to taste the wine in restaurants/let him fold the towels. Works both ways, I suppose. But I hear ya sister

One of my best friends had (note past tense!) a husband like that, every time we left their house after having a great time I would say to DH "lovely man - thank fuck I'm not married to him!".

Make sure you don't 'enable' him though.

Strong women + weak man= woman ending up sorting all shit.

Let him sort his own problems AND some of yours... even if he's crap at it he'll have to learn that not winning the popularity contest is better than being constantly taken for a ride. Sit back and watch.

PS Doesn't sound lovely to me, sounds a twat!

well your one up on me....yours is completely gorgeous.

mine has all that and is fug ugly.

That was in response to the AA man.

Problem is, he IS lovely. Have to go to bed - I have to make up the hour I have to leave school early to sort this tomorrow. SICK OF THIS - but he does have very good points.

Leave FOR school, I meant! Night all!

he does have very good points

Well thats a start, but he needs to get more!

Yes he's lovely. And charming. But other people are just part-time victims of his loveliness and charm. You are the full time victim.

Everything has a cost. If he's not paying it, someone else is. You. Mostly.

So CRS, learn to drive, and have fun driving your car purchased just 8 weeks ago, or its replacement.