Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

aibu to think that women with less children than me should wind their necks in...

102 replies

bentpenny · 14/06/2011 19:26

Just a quick one but my youngest ds had the most almighty tantrum today on the school run and one mum actually stood watching and smirking like it was some kind of spectator sport. Another one of the school run charmers shook her head and tutted. It's amazing what bitches women can be when we all know how hard it can be.

Another woman today gave me a long lecture with top tips and advice about how to pooty train my youngest. She has 1 child.

Ok, thats it -rant over. But do you ever get the feeling that some women think that anything more than 2 dc's with 5 years apart and a nanny is frankly a despicable thing to do. Smile

OP posts:
janajos · 14/06/2011 19:27

How many do you have?

janajos · 14/06/2011 19:28

And do you have a nanny?

BitOfFun · 14/06/2011 19:28

I'm not sure I understand what you are getting at, sorry. Maybe it's the random smile at the end?

janajos · 14/06/2011 19:28

Glad I'm not the only one confused!

Pandemoniaa · 14/06/2011 19:29

I think you must be seriously struggling with that chip on your shoulder. Would more ketchup help?

Mumcentreplus · 14/06/2011 19:29

Rise above it like an eagle

Flisspaps · 14/06/2011 19:29

Just because you have more than one child doesn't make you a parenting expert - perhaps the 'lecturing' woman thought she was being friendly and helpful, and perhaps the tut and head shaking was meant in a sisterly 'I remember those days' kind of way.

Grin at pooty train though Wink

HelloOutThere · 14/06/2011 19:29

ah dont worry their time will come Grin i remember preening with dd1 at her beautiful manners, behaviour, sweet smile.

Then i had dd2..............................

Choufleur · 14/06/2011 19:29

Why just people with less children? If they have more than you but are still rude/annoying is that ok?

fedupofnamechanging · 14/06/2011 19:32

When she was lecturing you, did you say that you have older DC and know how to potty train? If you just stood there and let her lecture you, then you are responsible too, for how that conversation turned out.

As for the judgy women watching your toddler have a tantrum, they can look smug now, but the time will come when it's their child having a strop in the street.

Mumcentreplus · 14/06/2011 19:33

I think OP just wants to rant...and I for one have utmost respect for anyone with more than 2 children.

tut and head shaking does not sound friendly and I don't even know these people I think OP does though...

Mumcentreplus · 14/06/2011 19:35

karma has no one caught you off guard before?... that's why OP is pissed off

TakeMeDrunkImHome · 14/06/2011 19:36

This kind of attitude really aggravates me. The ability to have more unprotected sex than the next person does NOT make you a better parent. See Jeremy Kyle show for evidence.

diabolo · 14/06/2011 19:37

Who has got the nanny? Confused

jzhmum · 14/06/2011 19:37

i have 4 and still have no clue what i am doing so take anyones advice! :)

RockStockAndTwoOpenBottles · 14/06/2011 19:37

I sort of understand where you're coming from OP. I have four children, the oldest of whom is almost 18. There is a 12 year gap between DC3 and DC4 and I have lost count of the times that people have said to me 'oh, just you wait 'til she's 5/9/14 etc' - I smile sweetly and walk on. They are not to know that I kind of have a clue as to what to expect with each and every year Grin

Comfort yourself with the knowledge that they too will also have shitty moments.

Mumcentreplus · 14/06/2011 19:38

wow! your'e a real sweetie aren't you Take

Fifis25StottieCakes · 14/06/2011 19:38

Grin @ hello, Thats what i thought till i had DD3.

CrapolaDeVille · 14/06/2011 19:41

One of my dcs walked at 20 mths, the sibling before her 19 and before that 16mths.... I gave up going to playgroups because I couldn;t take another head tilting...'she'll do it in her own time' 'don't worry they're all different' from people who had one child!!!

OP I understand.

Stase · 14/06/2011 19:42

Isn't the point that the OP has been tutted at by fellow parents who should know better?

When one of mine is having a public strop (rarer these days, thankfully) and someone seemed to be judging when I already felt self-conscious it would make me feel ten times worse! But don't all kids do it? I think the best response when you witness a kid acting up in public is to give them some room and mind your own business. Then come and start a judgey thread on MN later if you really must!

BelfastBloke · 14/06/2011 19:42

BoF "I'm not sure I understand what you are getting at, sorry. Maybe it's the random smile at the end?"

pyjamababe · 14/06/2011 19:42

Personally I get more annoyed by people who think they can patronise you just because they have more children... Some people just LOVE to say 'ooh wait until you have two!' - what if you can't have two? Sorry for the tangent but it makes me cross!

Original poster
bentpenny · 14/06/2011 19:43

mumcentreplus, yes you are right i just wanted a little rant. The smile was to signify the satisfaction of getting it off my chest. I have 3 dc's janajo's, no nanny and dh who works away. Pandemonia - i am very happy with my lot thanks so no ketchup required. I just had a trying day today, thats all.

OP posts:
MoreCrackThanHarlem · 14/06/2011 19:44

Laughing at a stressed out woman struggling with a toddler tantrum is a bit mean

Offering advice is fine though
I'm not sure about your attitude ie you can't tell me anything I've got 643 kids

Hassled · 14/06/2011 19:45

I feel like the OP does when MIL gives me her Top Parenting Tips. She only had two, I have four so na, na, na, na, nah. It's bollocks, of course - parents of one are just as likely to have a sensible opinion as a parent of ten.