In the last 5 days I have been spat at, sworn at, screeched at, pushed and had a chair thrown at my head (succesful shot)

[activate]

and I should go back to work next week because?

Please go away.
You are contributing nothing but sarcasm.

Goblin - I think I was very puzzled to read the OP's original posting tbh. She has a very robust attitude to AIBU (which I directly quoted at 15.44!) and seems to be someone with a tough minded approach to stuff generally.

So if OP had said "AIBU to have had an unbelievably crap week ending up with a thick lip and now in need of a few supportive words from experienced fellow educationalists, possibly of the unruly teenager kind" (or near offer ...)" then all would have been a bit more honest. BUt the guessing game business IMO was not well judged as I have explained above and I found it rather offputting.

AS far as the other thread goes, what Mumofalump says:
"Sometimes a person can feel for another person without having any experience of the situation that person is in.

That person would therefore have no practical advise to offer. Showing your support in other ways such as offering to be a shoulder to cry on, or an un-biased listener may be the only thing they can offer.

Much better than they sit back and offer nothing."

Ok, but I don't think the "guessing game" thing was intended in the way you seem to have interpreted it.

I am shocked and horrified at what you're putting up with in your line of work. I'd also be inclined to call the police next time you are assaulted. Nobody should have to put up with that.

HUGE round of applause for
MoreCrackThanHarlem
for joining the thread just now so everyone can see your Compassionate Wonderfulness by the way'

Catinthehat please can you explain this post to me?
I talked about my experience of a lack of provision for young children with EBD, and have contributed to the thread much earlier.
How on earth has this offended you?

JamieAgain - I think it's not a good thing re AIBU
The desperation in MH is shocking.
I wish those people who have the natural genuine knowledgeable compassion that I can see on this thread could take it over there as well.

(Not the Compassionately Wonderful carcrash viewers though, stay well away)

Self defence involves getting someone off you as fast as possible - throwing them to the floor, poking their eyes out, basically hurting them

Completely totally and utterly not what is needed in a school or caring environment

I apologise if your comment was meant well, ripeberry, but that displays quite outstanding ignorance. Did you see panorama the other day about the care home? That's what you get when people use "self defence" and personally that sickened me to the point I couldn't watch

Yes I'm trained in restraint techniques. The course I did most recently was 6 hours, 5.5 of which were verbal techniques so you don't need to get physical. In 6 years I could tell you each and every serious restraint I've been involved with and name the person restrained. Each time I went home and cried because I failed them by not being able to de-escalate the situation

That's not a pity fest it's just fact.

But I don't know anything much about MH issues, or bereavement, or complicated relationships, or style and beauty,so I've hidden those topics.
Better that people in real need of constructive support get it from those who know what they are talking about.
But I've had a shit week? That I do know about.

I am not always robust because I am not a robot. Do I need to apologise for that? I don't mind people speaking their mind and today I actually needed sympathy too - so shoot me.

I suppose I am robust and straight-talking because I know, when in my right mind, that at the end of the day I MAKE A DIFFERENCE

can you say the same?

Jamie - maybe , maybe not, but personally I didn't go for the tone, there are a lot of drip feeding bullshitters out there unfortunately

sorry, many cross-posts in between

I am extremely grateful for the professional advice on this thread

catinthehat, you have turned this thread into your own personal battleground. We dont all have time to be on here 24/7 as some of us actually have other things we need to do in our lives. The way you are attacking everyone on here who has something positive to say, is putting us off posting.

op, i have had some personal experience of what you have described, but there is no way i am going to post or empathise, as i have no desire to be torn into shreds by someone who doesnt like my grammar diction or something else minor which will no doubt be picked on. Hope your week improves on the last one.

We (actually not me but other staff) are taught restraint techniques. But if staff use them it involves an awful lot of paper work and form filling to justify why restraint was used. The reasons usually involve the safeguarding of other children in the setting.

Self defence?! How do you defend yourself from a thrown chair or a well placed kick from a kid who you are not 'allowed' to touch?

Verbal techniques can work, but sometimes there is nothing you can do to de-escalate a situation. It's very tense and stressful spending hours knowing that a kid 'will' kick off (eg seeing the signs) and knowing that you will not be able to prevent it and that when it does happen your options to protect yourself are limited. For any adult in this situation the priority is protecting the child involved and other children before defending themselves.

I have rarely seen such a spiteful attempt to derail someone's thread out of what seems like sheer spitefulness.

I hope next week is better, activate.

what an odd person!

Aaaagh too many spitefuls
Am a bit cross

Cat, why the vendetta against the op? Is your house made of glass, as you're throwing a metric shitload of stones around today. So many that they appear to be metamorphosing into toys and that glass house looks suspiciously pram-shaped to me

Do jog on, dearie. You've made quite enough of a spectacle of yourself now.

purplepidjin - that is an interesting analogy (wrt if it had been domestic violence).

I thought about it for the past hour or so and my profound conclusions are that you lot aren't paid enough and don't get enough recognition for the work you do.

I'm waiting for karma to get hold of me, animula

I work in an SLD school and weeks like the op described were a regular day for me at one point. I am trained in restraint and had to use it daily to stop myself and others being hurt.

It's bloody hard work and if you don't have the right support at work (or even if you do) it's perfectly fine to be more than a little pissed off with it at times.

It's really low pay for the work that is done and can be very verys tressful at times. Despite this I know I (and I can bet most people who work in these settings) wouldn't do anything else.

Activate I really hope next week is calmer for you.

Okayyyyyy

I know someone else (similarly spiteful) on another forum who posts like this.

starts stopwatch waiting for OP to get thread deleted

WTF?

I have rarely seen such a spiteful attempt to derail someone's thread out of what seems like sheer spitefulness

MoreCrackThanHarlem - I agree.

pity my poor dh he works in this enviroment (he loves his job he says )and then comes home to our severely autistic 18 year old son with challenging behaviour +

took me a min to figure out your job but i think i have as i have a cousin who stayed in a resi kids home on and off for around 4 yrs i know the crap you've to put up with from the stories iv heard of her and some of the folk who used to work there. a girl just a few yrs ago accused a member of staff of rape and the department of covering it up every one of them sacked and not reinstated after it was proven by cctv she was lying, kids stealing, drinking, beating each other and staff up, girls prostituting themselves, drug dealers at the door demanding money because a few boys have got into debt,regimental bullying of meeker children and staff who would love to take home the good kids/beat crap out the bad ones. just so you know there are kids who appreciate what your doing even the bad ones if you keep at it yes its tirning and incredibly hard but my cousin was a complete terror and because of a great key worker in her final home is actually not that bad a person - not perfect but not a druggy/prostitute/criminal - just a bit of a mouth on her please remember that maybe one day they'll thank you