to think this woman was unacceptably rude

[pamelat]

On holiday last week with DH and DC.

DH tells me of the following encounter .

DD (3.4) helping herself (he was lifting her up) to the buffet food. She wasn't messing about but is slower than an adult, she was helping herself with a large serving spoon to something or the other.

Woman comes up, removes the server from her hands (no word muttered) helps herself to the food and then puts the serving utensil back down and walks off

She wasn't British (German I think) but surely with or without language barriers this is utterly unacceptable.

DH says both he and DD were too shocked to say anything.

It wasnt as though there was a large queue, it was a help yourself buffet and no one else around.

Surely she could have waited!!

Paggy darling, do you remember that the child is three? The penis thing might be a worry...

Ah, you meant the mad German carrot interloper...

I love how some posters are going out of their way to embellish the scenario to make it ok that this woman snatched a spoon out of a child's hand with nary a word of please or apology! FFS, I bet you queue-jump children in shops as well, don't you, because they "shouldn't be there".

I was in the local newsagents a few weeks back, buying a card - there was a child of about 9 hovering near the counter - he looked most surprised when I waved him to the till ahead of me, as was his right. Obviously used to the fundamental lack of manners that some adults believe should be shown to small children.

well I never, this AIBU, which should have ended in 6 posts all saying YANBU has dissolved into 320 pages of MADNESS.

Demonstrates all that is wrong with MN these daze............

320 pages ??

bugger, I've lost 313 pages of German Spoon Snatcher Shenanigans

if it was done 2 my son i would have snatched the spoon off of the old bint and wacked her with it! how bludy rude no excuse if she was in a hurry all she had 2 say was sorry can i have some, thanks. manners dnt cost anything!

i think you are being a bit precious and over reacting and to get angry and insulting about it is not the best example to set.
its not that big a deal..not as if she told your dd off or anything, just helped herself...perhaps she thought it was a bit spoilt to hold adults up who may equally be serving their own dc?

oh yes, it's so spoilt to be serving yourself with food - and not at all spoilt to think you have higher rights over the spoon for your own little preciouses. Obviously.

DD wanted the grated carrot because it looked pretty not because she wanted to eat it?! Well she certainly shouldn't have been taking ages to serve herself then just to look at it on her plate!

It is absolutely fucking irrelevant whether the child wanted to eat it or look at it!! It's not like the bloody rudesby woman knew that, is it?? It's not ABOUT the child, it's about the ignorant, mannerless behaviour of a GROWN WOMAN who should have known better but chose to behave as though the child was a non-person.

i think most parents would serve their child so as not to inconvenience other people.. children can learn to do it but have to learn to be quick or its just spoilt!
tbh 3 is too young to be serving herself at the buffet

lol

mn

the last authority on spoon etiquette

author - thumbwitch

it's self-satisfied smugness - "look at my wonderful 3 year old isn't she just clever and funny and wonderful, look how she's serving herself and how cute she is that I have to lift her up to reach because she's so tiny and cute and adorable. Look everybody, look what a wonderful caring parent I am, aren't I doing a good job teaching her how to serve herself"

"look it's been 5 minutes and I just want some carrots"

(arthritic old lady I would assume would not have the same smug air)

you do not teach your child where it will inconvenience others

I agree with Thumbwitch.

Where have all these people come from that think that it is acceptable for people to be so rude to children.

Are they having a laugh because I cannot believe that.

Have you considered taking your own spoon in future?

Manners are manners.

No matter what other carroty factors:

YOU DO NOT WALK UP TO A HUMAN BEING AND TAKE A SPOON FROM THEIR HAND WITH OR WITHOUT SAYING A WORD.

IT IS RUDE.

If the child had said' Die in agony, bitch cow from hell!' I think that would have been rude. Silly woman was simply delightfully British understatement.

pag - I beleive cucumbers are the vegetable of choice when it comes to penis-fashioning. Not carrots.

Clearly the correct thing to have done would be for your DH to have turned to scan the entire room for possible carrot-deprived persons, then loudly announced his intention to allow your DD to serve herself some carrot and invited anyone to come and help themselves first, thus avoiding any carrot-deprivation incidents (maybe involving carrots-at-dawn style duels and a host of emergency vehicles in attendance).

This process should be repeated with each and every item at the buffet table.

You can't be too careful, you know.

Wrt the 'silly woman' comment, entirely reasonable.

Now, if your DD had tutted, that would indeed be cause for an international incident.

Shodan's idea is the way forward.

True orm.
But being German she may have been wary of cucumber

YANBU!!!! I would not make my son wait to serve himself and let others go first!! an adult, a child whichever if there is a que and I'm in front or the child is in front that that person goes first! If she'd have snatched the spoon from my son she'd have been removing it from her nostril!!!