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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to want to give this mum some advice somehow?

37 replies

storminabuttercup · 02/06/2011 21:44

have an aquaintance from my anti-natal group, we meet up now and again and have a chat about the kids

anyone that has seen my other posts will know was paranoid about what i fed ds (9 months) and i've asked for and recieved some fab advice on here and i'm lots more relaxed now.

However, this friend had always been laid back, her ds same age is given yoghurts two or three times a day, which ok each to their own. but since then i have seen her feed ds mini chedars and i know this will sound like i'm making it up, but sausage rolls and cornish pasties (no fruit shoots so far)

She's asked me 'would ds like some' and i've said no i try and be careful about salt etc, as a subtle hint and i know that its none of my business, but i'm worried about this baby.

I'm trying not to sound horrible here i dont think i'm coming accross very well, but if anyone has any advice id appreciate it - even if it is mind your own?

OP posts:
StealthPolarBear · 02/06/2011 21:46

Sorry but this is her choice. You have mentioned salt, that's all you can do.
Are mini cheddars really salty then?

Marne · 02/06/2011 21:47

keep your nose out Grin, its not worth the hastle (her child, her choice).

jelliebelly · 02/06/2011 21:47

what makes you qualified to give advice to her? unless she asks for your opinion I would keep quiet and let her get on with it.

MadamMemoo · 02/06/2011 21:47

Really it's not your business, concentrate on your own child and let her worry about hers.

prettyfly1 · 02/06/2011 21:48

Uh yes. YABU. This is not your business and certainly not your place to comment or judge on. Feeding a child shite food is not a great parenting choice but it is HER choice as a parent and you hoiking up your judgy pants is going to get you a big F OFF.

MrsGravy · 02/06/2011 21:49

Well it depends on how often he's having those kinds of foods. I have to say, my 11 month old DD has had that kind of thing. With 2 older kids who eat things like that from time to time she does end up eating all kinds of crap a wide variety of food. But we're talking the odd crisp here and there...a pastie once a month or so (unless home made) rather than a steady diet of salty processed food. Mind you, I don't know how you'd broach the subject without putting her back up....

SarahStratton · 02/06/2011 21:49

Wow, how did you manage to post without your name showing?

I think you need to accept that you would be interfering. It's not right, but it is her choice to ignore the masses of nutritional information available.

NotShortImFunSized · 02/06/2011 21:49

Is your ds your first? I was like that with my first and second

Number 5 however Hmm

I wouldn't say anything tbh.

TeddyMcardle · 02/06/2011 21:50

Worried about the baby- haha! In the nicest possible way I think you would benefit from a new hobby!

K999 · 02/06/2011 21:50

YABU. Fine to worry about what you feed your own dc but she can feed her child whatever she likes.

thelittlefriend · 02/06/2011 21:50

they may be a bit salty but really not that awful surely? I really don't think you need to be concerned about it

EdithWeston · 02/06/2011 21:51

I think it's a case of "mind your own" in general. I also think that what you're already doing ("no, I don't want him to have that because of the salt levels") is fine and indeed sensible, but is as far as you can go. She'll either take the hint or not.

Mumwithadragontattoo · 02/06/2011 21:51

YABU - These are just normal foods to have in moderation. It sounds like she's less worried about salt than you are. So what? It's none of your business and I doubt she gives them to him every day. Really, don't say anything else to her.

StealthPolarBear · 02/06/2011 21:52

SS her name is there - think it must be your browser!

Birdsgottafly · 02/06/2011 21:54

YABU, humans are pretty good at recovering from a less than perfect diet in childhood.

Original poster
storminabuttercup · 02/06/2011 21:57

I'm really glad i asked on here, i havent said anything except that i try and be careful with salt and certainly wouldnt want to piss anyone off. She's asked a few times what ds eats and stuff and i've mentioned that i get advice off the blw forum for recipes etc but havent said she should do the same.

i'm off to take my judgey pants off and give my ass an airing Grin

OP posts:
razzlebathbone · 02/06/2011 21:59

YABU - nothing to do with you and you don't need to worry about the child. Unless she is force feeding him salt these things won't kill him. And yes many of us do believe you because we give this sort of thing to our own kids in moderation. My DD was about nine months when she first had a sausage roll at a party to gnaw on.

AngryGnome · 02/06/2011 21:59

YABU, it's not really any of your business. The baby isn't at risk, just being given foods you'd rather not feed your baby.

And what's wrong with yoghurt?! Genuine question, I don't know!

Nixea · 02/06/2011 22:01

What on earth is wrong with yoghurt now?! I though I knew all the rules and weirdness but yoghurts?

jubaloo22 · 02/06/2011 22:01

What do you really think is gonna happen to you DCs if they eat a few mini chedders and the occasional mini pasty?

Just wondering?

I have a very fussy eater ds1 and tbh feed him what ever he'll eat! Advised by paed and HV. Is he gonna die a horrible death or blow up in a puff of smoke? Grin Seriously YABVU its non of you business!

Avantia · 02/06/2011 22:01

When my son was 12 months old I used o give him Quavers and get a look of horror from other Mums feeding their children 'Organic crips' .

I was giving him Quavers on advice from Paed Dietician because he had reflux and would gag and not chew - the melting of Quavers in his mouth went someway to get over this.

Since this I have learnt not to judge what other people give their children .

Original poster
storminabuttercup · 02/06/2011 22:12

nothing wrong with yoghurts imo - ds would eat them all day if he could, i didnt explain myself properly - when i say a few times a day i meant as a meal. And then with pasties and stuff every other day it just seems that maybe shes unsure or something with her asking me where i get recipes etc from?

I am by no means perfect and i do give ds stuff that maybe isnt the best, i just wondered if anyone had any tips on where one goes for advice that isnt on here iyswim?

OP posts:
befuzzled · 02/06/2011 22:15

PFB (I was the same)

AnnieLobeseder · 02/06/2011 22:16

So you've seen her feed those foods to her DS while out and about? Do you know what she feeds him at home?

Snack foods when out and about are often less than ideal. For all you know he has an excellent diet at home.

The occasional mini cheddar or cornish pastie will do no harm.

Butt out, it's done of your business. You sound very precious.

Newbabynewmum · 02/06/2011 22:24

I give my 8mo cheddars every now and then. She bloody loves them