to be sick to death of having to put up with other people's dogs

[WriterofDreams]

I am not a dog person. I think they're nice but I don't want to pet a dog or be anywhere near them really. This partly comes from being attacked by a dog as a young child.

This was never a problem when I lived in Ireland, where a dog is a subservient pet that is to be kept in line. In busy areas dogs are generally kept on a lead at all times and IME if a loose dog ever came up to me the owner always apologised and pulled the dog away. In the park where I used to go walking any dog that wasn't on a lead was taken away by the pound, whether the owner was close by or not. This was to protect the wildlife in the area.

Since moving to England I have come to hate dogs, not really through any fault of their own. There is a common near me where I often go walking with DS, who thankfully is still in a pram so I don't have to worry about him. On every single occasion, often more than once, a large dog has come up to me, often running. On a couple of occasions a dog has jumped up on me, scaring the absolute shit out of me. On practically every occasion the owner has either not been anywhere in the vicinity (as the dog has run far ahead of them) or has smiled indulgently and uttered the immortal phrase "he is very friendly!" before feebly calling the dog and offering no apology for the fact that dog invaded my space and scared me. On a few occasions I have been scared witless by dogs viciously fighting on the path.

AIBU to think the owners have a responsibility to keep their dogs close to them and not allow them to harrass other people?

Are dog owners aware at what I'm referring to when I say I object to people's dogs when they're out of control? I will explain in more detail. I generally only run on tracks, not wide swathes of park or grassland (I don't like running on grass) ie where cyclists and families walking with children are as well. Often quite narrow paths in places. Round where I live, there are only two dog owners who cause trouble, and speaking to friends, a couple of them think they have met the same people too.

Its when you are going past, you give them plenty of room, and the dog, not on a lead, runs up to you and blocks your path. You try to go to the side and the dog jumps up, blocking you that way. Or stands in front of you barking and growling. And if you attempt to continue, or even just stand still waiting for the dog owner to call them off, they jump up and scratch you and put muddy paw marks all down your clothes. The owner makes no attempt to call them off.

Now to me, thats really ignorant, and I do get annoyed at the owners in those circumstances. Thankfully its pretty rare.

I've also had a friend - a nearly 6 feet tall bloke, who was knocked over by a large, loose dog when out running on tracks through a public park. The dog owner gave him a load of abuse for "upsetting her dog and causing it to do it".

Can you see why I think people like this are sociopaths? I also do not understand why people are not ashamed/embarrassed when they can't control their dogs in public. It reflects badly on them. I'd be mortified at my horse skills if my horses misbehaved in public.

Overcooked - I dont mind at all. My staffie plays out with my kids and their friends all the time, watched obviously. Loes a game of footie and frisby.

Maybe not my Patterdale x she could be a bit tempremental but shes still only young

Just depends on the dog really

hephaestus, sorry, no, this hybrid's name doesn't begin with N.

I know there are very few genuine ones - this girl came over from the USA. You see the difference in her and the average Shep or Husky when you look at her eyes. :)

Overcooked, I'm delighted when parents and children ask to fuss my dogs rather than poke, scream at or prod them or swear at me for daring to own them!

My elder GSD is epileptic and nervous so the answer is no for him, for fear of stressing him and causing a fit, my Lab cross previously abused and not fond of other people's children but my huge great lolloping 4 yo German Shepherd will sit and offer a paw and nudge your DC for another fuss and absolutely loves the attention.

And I always make a point of telingl the DC what a good boy or girl they are for asking me and for making sure their parent/carer is with them and says it's alright. :)

Sounds like DD would love your German Shepherd.

While you're here actually, DH insists that I prevent her from approching staffies even if they're with owners and the owners agrees on the basis that they can be unpredictible and extremely vicious - what do you think of this, is there any dogs you would avoid with a small child just in case?

Staffies are my favourite breed of all and are often referred to as the nanny dog because of their fondness of children. Your DH is talking out of his arse, sorry

I wouldn't avoid any breed so long as the owner says it's fine.

I think that your husband's an arse, frankly.

A. What he is saying is bullshit.

B. What he is saying is DANGEROUS bullshit encourages the prejudice against Staffies which has a lot to do with so many of them being KILLED in pounds. This sort of rubbish encourages otherwise nice families to avoid the breed when they consider owning/adoptinga dog, hence the vicious circle continues.

Ask your DH this, without telling him a word about my dogs:

Which would he prefer, your DD to stroke a Staffie or my Labrador, with permission from both owners?

Because if he would prefer her to stroke my Lab rather than a SBT with the owner's confirmation that the dog is safe to do so he'd be a bloody idiot. My Labrador does not like other people's children and would make that very clear to them.

My last foster dog, prior to me fostering the white GSD I have now, was a Staffie. She would have licked your child to death. It's not about the BREED, it's about the individual dog, just as his nationality or the colour of his skin or hair does not make him a bad, stupid or dangerous man.

But hey, if your husband would like his prejudices and ignorance get his child bitten one day, far be it for me to argue.

Overcooked - mines a bit lump of softness, ive never really coome across a vicious one myself. My friend has 2 aged 10 and 12 and they are the same. Neighbours got one and thats lovely.Mine doesnt fight with other dogs it runs away from any sign of conflict. My patterdalex is a lot more feisty and has bugged the life out of the staff and shes never so much as growled. She just gives her a filthy look and comes to me as if to say sort that dog out.

Its true what they say, mines definately the nanny dog. Yes they were originally bred as fighting dogs but do you think the owners who had them for fighting would keep them if they attacked their families.

Just got a bad rep due to bad reporting and chavs sticking huge daft collars on them and making them fight. If you look at bite stats and see how many other breeds have bitten people but not been reported on the news, its shocking

Theres a pic on my profile - cute as can be

Overcooked. I was the same before i got one. The kids dad came in with her 5 years ago and i went get that out of this house, are you mad.

Im pleased he didnt listen to me shes the most loyal, friendly dog i could have hoped for.

I used to feel like you about dogs when the dcs were young.
We never had a dog, and my mother disliked them.
We loved cats though.
My eyes were opened by some of dd's friends being "scared" of our cat. I suddenly saw that a cat could be viewed as a dangerous biting scratching verminous creature. Familiarization was all.

I then made a point of asking people about their dogs - what breeds they were etc, talking to dog owners delibarately in front of the children, creating an atmosphere of trust etc in parks.

The strange things is that I now like all the dogs I meet, and want one (eventually - probs with travelling abroad and legistics, and husband hating dogs too!) It does take acclimatization.

Looks like I don't need to add any more about your DH, Overcooked . I sometimes deliberately stand near groups with children when I have my dog (not weirdy stalker style, but if waiting for someone outside a shop or at the school gates) and it's absolutely guaranteed that at some point a child will ask to stroke her and then more will on seeing this and soon she will be stroked by about 4 children at once so there are at least 4 adults who have gone away realising that Staffords do not flip out and attack children on a whim.

Hephaestus - I met a genuine Northern Inuit the other week when I was home checking for a cat. Absolutely beautiful dog.

This thread(and others about dogs) is very enlightening.

My impression from childhood, and not actually having dogs, but occasionally hearing stories was that labradors were incredibly soppy, slightly dim creatures, faithful retainer types, terriers were charming intelligent but snappy sheep hassling, rat catching types...and as you say, completely misinformed, that staffies were frightening. Big dogs were slurpy and soppy, small dogs were snappy, sort of sums it up.

I agree with OP, they are a pain in the arse !

Many English people are a bit barmy when it comes to their dogs.

Pointless trying to understand it, very strange IMO, but it is just one of those quirks that dogs are very special there, are as important as children and could not possibly under any circumstances be controlled.

Not much you can do about it OP.

Whoa Valhalla - I know you feel strongly about this but I was just asking your opinion. Your final sentence is really a bit over the top, I have come here looking for guidance and really I think what you have said is unecessary.

Again, I understand you feel strongly about this but perhaps just take a step back and look at what I originally asked you and then the final sentence to your response.

Ffif25 gave a much, much more measured and helpful response, thank you fifi :o

Overcooked - Its a shame it really is but you cant help but believe what the papers and news say. Theres probably are vicioous staffies just as there are other breeds who are vicious. I think its more down to the dog and the way its been raised. A man over the road has an English Bull Terrier (the ones with the long nose) I am absoloutely terrified of it. I was even before it chased my dog and mauled a neighbours. Nothing can change the fear i have of it chained up outside snarling and basically being aggressive. He is an ignorant twat the owner and he is a man in his 50's whos a company director, not some chav. There is a lady at the school gates who has one and its lovely all the kids pat it. We sometimes take my staff and hers to the field for a run off together

Val - the one I know came from Canada and yes, it's all in the eyes. Absolutely stunning dog, very gentle with people she knows but nervous around strangers and she has never been fully housetrained. Beautiful, beautiful creature but not much use as either working animal or pet.

MotherJack - not sure what you mean by genuine, they're just GSD/husky/mal crosses. Lots of controversy over the breeding of those, I could go on at length but I don't think anyone particularly wants to hear it. Beautiful dogs but a complete mixed bag.

I also would never, ever place a cat to a home with a husky or husky x. For every owner who says 'oh, my husky has lived for years with a cat, they're best friends' there's another who has lived with a cat for years and then slaughtered it one day as it came through the cat flap.

Oooh, can I pick some brains please?

My friend has an Alaskan Malamute. I have a toddler.

Anything I should be particularly aware of with this breed? (over and above basic toddler/dog caution)

Hephaestus - I don't know what I mean either. I'm talking about the breed like it's a Chanel handbag or something, aren't I . So..... basically, a Northern Inuit is a mongrel, then?

I have heard that they are not to be trusted with anything small and furry.... although I met the two Malamutes I see out on a walk with my staff today and they all get along really well. I really hope I don't have to change my mind on that!!

Cross posts tethersend! But I know nothing about the breed and children. I have a sneaking suspicion that hephaestus may well though....

Overcooked AFAIK Fifi isn't a rescuer who dedicates as much time as she can to saving dogs, Staffies in particular, before they are killed in pounds as a result f human ignorance and misinformation. She might be able to afford the emotional detachment of being a little more charitable. I don't - I see dogs die as an indirect result of stupid comments such as those made by your husband.

And I stand by what I said. If he honestly believes what he says then he's setting your child up for a potentially dangerous situation because he is giving her the wrong information.

As I posted previously - there are vicious staffies, like the one which attacked my collie. And like my sister's dog who will attack other dogs as soon as look at them.

But I also agree that they get a v bad press unneccessarily as two vicious ones that I know of does not make them 'bad' dogs. It means the owners are irresponsible and/or unable/unwilling to control them.

And overcooked provided people ask (esp children) I have no issue at all with them stroking my dog. He loves a fuss and will nudge you with his nose into the right place or if you stop.

I always make a big thing of the fact that the children have asked - telling them what a sensible thing that is to do and very polite.

Meant to say that doesn't make staffies a bad dog or a bad breed.

Mals ain't my thing but I can tell you that both they and huskies have zero guarding instinct, so are very welcoming and accepting of strangers and generally have a reputation as being great and friendly with people. I'd make a guess at them being very tolerant of children. Also they are great to cuddle.

MotherJack yep, mongrels. Nothing wrong with that, of course, only the 'breed society' has had more spats than I've had hot dinners with the result that there are variously British inuits, utonagans, tamaskans, nothern inuits and so on - all various combinations of the three breeds, none of which yet breed true so the pups are a complete pick and mix of size, shape and temperament. Some breeders haven't been scrupulous about health testing, it's almost never the best examples of the breeds being crossed and in dogs of that size hip and elbow dysplasia is a real fear.

It just rankles with me because they have no purpose at all, they will never make as good workers as any of the parent breeds (harness work and protection/herding/obedience) and the originators are open about the fact that they simply wanted to produce a dog that looked as much as possible like a wolf. Breeding dogs on the basis of good looks over performance has been the undoing of many, many breeds we know today.