To not want a parent to sit in my kitchen forcan hour whilst her ds has a guitar lesson?

[GColdtimer]

dh is a guitar teacher. Most parents either drop their kids then and pop off for an hour or sit in their car reading a book. A fairly new student's mum gas said that becsuse of the traffic she will read her book in our kitchen for an hour.

Aibu to really not want her in my kitchen, especially between 3-4 on a Friday afternoon. And if I aibu, what do I say without seeming quite mean?

Sorry but am having a laugh at the visionof someone sitting politely on a hard chair in my hallway whilst dd2 runs around like the lunatic toddler she is and dd1 falls out with her friend about what Disney princess she is going to be and I try to cook dinner. I honestly will give her 10 minutes before she walks the 10 minutes to the lovely tea shop round the corner!

I would say that onlu the music teaching room (or whatever you call it) is insured for business guests but you are happy to provide a chair in your hallway (or equally uncomfortable area)
Then shut yourself in kitchen with bolt on inside quick!

Oh 14. That will teach me to open loads of pages and not refresh when I go to post

YANBU to keep her out of the kitchen, from a health and safety point of view at least. Tell her you'll be cooking supper and she can't wait inthe kitchen. If she insists on staying in the house, a wooden chair in the hall is all you need to offer. when I had piano lessons as a child, all the parents waited in the hall on an old church pew. My dad got fed up pretty quickly and sat in the car listening to the radio.

I would say to her, and anyone else doing the same, "of course you can stay, let me get you a chair" and direct her in to the room where the lesson is being held. She is hardly going to be rude enough to say " no I prefer to sit in your kitchen" and if she is that rude then you're entitled to be rude back and say, "no all parents staying have to stay where the lesson is taking place".

i think its up to your dh really to tell her that its not something that they usually do. Maybe its not worth her going home? Maybe she is overprotective?

When my mum or dad took my sister to music lessons, they'd wait in the car outside doing paperwork, reading a book, or listening to the radio. If there was a designated area to wait, they'd probably still have done the same - they certainly would not have informed someone that they would be sitting in an area of their home

Wmmc, dh hates having parents there for that reason but accepts people will want to suss him out. Dh generally doesn't teach anyone under 10 and they are mostly over 12 and as it's mostly electric guitar they think they are very cool and normally can't wait to get rid of their parents.

Bogeyface, happy to hear opinions but your assumption I didn't want this parent "anywhere near the place" was wrong and I am not sure how you interpreted that frommy op.

Don't think YABU. You would be if you/your DH said she couldn't sit in in the room where the lesson was taking place, but that's the only part of the house to do with his work - the rest is your home. She's chosen a teacher who only happens to have one room available for his work. She can either sit in that room with her mortified 14 year old son or go somewhere else for an hour. Or get a different teacher who works in a studio or something, where there is also a designated waiting area.

Thanks for helpful replies. I think I will just get dh to sAy parents normly either sit In on the lesson (which she doesn't want to do) or take the opportunity to go and do a bit of shopping or go for a coffee. If she doesn't take the hint she can stay and I will prime the dcs to be at their maddest whilst I boil cabbage and gut fish

:o twofalls boiling cabbage was my plan B thought!

I would just say NO
especially as she seems to have assumed it would be ok!

outrageous idea

What the??? This lady is PAYING for her child to be taught, it is yours/your dh's chioce that he does this from home, therefore I think YABU to want to kick the parent out. Especially as the student is new!

Part & parcel of inviting students into your home is accommodating the PAYING parent too.

And anyway, I would have though it would be beneficial to your dh to have a chaperone present, no?

"Oh, I'm sorry, that won't be convenient. There is a lovely tea room just around the corner you could sit in though"

is

differentname - the mum wants to sit in the kitchen. That's hardly acting as a chaperone

Maybe the son is shy, maybe they've had a bad experience before with another teacher. I don't think yabu to not want to entertain her in your kitchen whilst you are sorting dinner and children but I can understand why she may want to stay.

Your dh needs to be the one to talk to her, whatever you decide to do

The kid is 14, I don't think he needs a chaperone?

Very presumptuous of her to assume she can wait in your kitchen. What Iscream said; if I were her I'd be in the car with my book or go for a stroll.

YANBU. Private houses don't generally have "waiting rooms" so I think giving her the "sit in on the lesson or come back later" option is totally reasonable. Paying for your child to have a music lesson doesn't give you some kind of access all areas pass, presumably parents can satisfy themselves that your DH has the relevant working with children checks. If that's not enough for them then maybe need to choose a school of music that might have waiting facilities.

I used to have a lot of music lessons as a child and teachers always had a comfortable waiting area for either parents or the next pupil. Usually my parents didn't stay, but there was always the option. Having said that, its not unreasonable for you to decide where that area is - wherever your sofa is seems a good place, whether or not that is in the room where the lesson happens. YABU to expect no disruption at all if you are hosting music lessons in your home, but fair enough to keep some private areas too.

Fiar point OP it was a bad choice of words! I just think that, as has been mentioned, it isnt U for the mother to expect to be able to wait for him at the place where the lesson is taking place.

or a FAIR point, even!

I was on the fence from your OP, but having seen that he's 14, YANBU! It's not like he needs a chaperone. Having to mill about for an hour while DCs do activities is just an annoying part of the whole Extra-Curricular Thing.

Of course it's nice to have a waiting room, but this is a one-man band ('scuse the pun) - it's in his home. If the mum wants somewhere more official she should find a different teacher.

For private music lessons we have always had to wait in the car or similar. At one stage we had 14 pencils in the car as we did so much homework in it. We also still tend o know local playgrounds, cafes and fit supermarket trips into the waiting. YANBU, its normal. Some places had a chair in the hall, but that was just to wait for the end of the lesson if it over ran, or for the next pupil to wait.

The kid is fourteen.
Unless you live in the sticks with no bus route, he should be making his own way there and back.