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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think this is a request too far?

94 replies

Helenagrace · 18/05/2011 20:10

My brother is getting married in September. My dd is a bridesmaid. I've had an email from the bride stating that all close family members are to wear red for the wedding as that is her chosen colour scheme. I thought she wanted us to wear a bit of red, maybe as an accent colour, but no she actually wants us all to wear red outifts. All the men have to wear a tie supplied by her.

I look hideous in red and have point blank refused. I am now coming under pressure from my mother to cave in.

Am I being unreasonable or is this normal bride behaviour (if it is I was waaaaay too laid back!).

I'm guessing I would be unreasonable to go all out to find the colour that clashes most with red (coral? turquoise?)?

OP posts:
southeastastra · 18/05/2011 20:12

is she a newly elected labour councillor?Grin

TheArmadillo · 18/05/2011 20:13

YANBU

bridezilla

I would compromise with an outfit than complemented the red and wear a red corsage.

I look hideous in red too and nothing on this earth would convince me to wear it.

rookiemater · 18/05/2011 20:13

YANBU - I would treat it as a joke and nudge her in the ribs and tell her how hilarious it is.

Nixea · 18/05/2011 20:14

Yikes! I was just grateful that everyone turned up for mine. I can't imagine having the cheek to tell guests what to wear - doing the wedding party was enough for me!!

YADNBU. Sounds like a bad case of Bridezilla to me. BTW, is she paying for all these red outfits? Just strikes me that many people already have outfits for weddings. Asking everyone to splash out for new ones seems a bit OTT.

ashamedandconfused · 18/05/2011 20:14

that is possibly the worst bridezilla idea I have ever heard on here!

have you been given a swatch of the exact red she wants, there are so many different ones, surely they might clash with one another

oh and is she wearing white cos red and white is meant to be unlucky(so says my nana, something to do with blood and bandages?)

needanewname · 18/05/2011 20:15

I would let her know that you have hunted everywhere and can;t find anythign that suits you in a block colour red but that you think its a lovely idea and will certainly get some accessories.

Sirzy · 18/05/2011 20:15

YANBU.

I agree with going with a colour which compliments the red and then a small touch of red and if she doesn't like it - tough

ashamedandconfused · 18/05/2011 20:16

do you like to wear green OP?

wear green and tell her you are ever so sorry if its not the right shade of red, but you are colourblind!

FabbyChic · 18/05/2011 20:17

I'd say happy to wear red accessories, or a red top under a black suit but not red entirely, what a waste of money you probably wouldn't wear it again after.

RED at a wedding? whatever next.

sausagesandmarmelade · 18/05/2011 20:17

Agree with ashamed...

This is TOTALLY bridezillerish behaviour...and I certainly wouldn't pander to it!!!

How ridiculous!

expatinscotland · 18/05/2011 20:17

Bridezilla. Tell your mother to go get knotted.

Wear some token red and if she doesn't like it, tough.

UrsulaBuffay · 18/05/2011 20:18

It will look like an explosion in an abattoir.

stickytoffeepud · 18/05/2011 20:18

id say ok, then do my own thing :)

what can she do?

allsquareknickersnofurcoat · 18/05/2011 20:18

cerise! buy something cerise and insist point blank that it is red!

saffy85 · 18/05/2011 20:18

Hire an outfit from a costume shop. Tomato, Strawberry, devil.

Or be reasonable and dull and accesorise only with red. No way would I go anywhere dressed head to toe in red by choice. I like the colour, but surely a whole guestlist of people dressed only in red would mean the photos will just look like pictures of giant ketchup bottles?

Vallhala · 18/05/2011 20:19

YABTooTolerant! By now I would have reminded her that for nearly 40 years I have chosen my OWN clothes in the morning and that I had no intention of changing that practice just yet.

I'd be buggered if anyone was going to dictate what I wear at my age!

A nice shade of salmon pink should hit the piss-the-Bridezilla-off spot perfectly. :o

If I were you and salmon not an option I might however consider a very short red devil outfit, complete with tail, red fishnets and horns if she continued to be insistant.....

TidyDancer · 18/05/2011 20:20

I would go with the compromise of wearing a 'neutral' colour such as black or white that would go with red and use red accessories. Flower in your hair, red bag, red shoes, etc.

But to answer your question, YADNBU. Bridezilla if ever I saw one!

DON'T CAVE IN!!!!

sausagesandmarmelade · 18/05/2011 20:20

an explosion in an abertoir....LOL

BimboNo5 · 18/05/2011 20:20

I would happily do it as I love red- but that is besides the point, how someone can dictate what a guest wears at a wedding is beyond me- over inflated sense of self importance or what?

Vallhala · 18/05/2011 20:20

Snap, Saffy! :o

Roman brides wore red... perhaps a nice toga...? :o

ENormaSnob · 18/05/2011 20:21

Is this a joke?

If not tell them to get fucked.

Utopian · 18/05/2011 20:22

How utterly bizarre I have been to stacks of weddings from someone who wanted there dogs there to a gay rave wedding but I have never been told what to wear!!

I don't think your being unreasonable, I think she is. Tell her straight and wear what you like you may find some of the rest of the family are waiting for someone to make a stand and follow suit....(just not a red one! ha ha:)

Goodluck x

ChristinedePizan · 18/05/2011 20:22

I quite like turquoise and red together :o Go for it