Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

To wonder why people let themselves get fat?

776 replies

Judgeywedgiepants · 17/05/2011 09:15

I am frequently amazed at the number of women at 15/17/20 stone who suddenly realise how fat they are and want to do something about it.
Why do people let themselves get so fat? It's unhealthy, unsightly and very life limiting.
Why not just keep an eye on your weight and keep it nice and steady?

OP posts:
ChaosTrulyReigns · 17/05/2011 10:00

As the OP was written to be deliberately hurtful and incendiary, I propose we starve it of the oxygen of attention and hide this thread.

Anyone care to join me on the IgnoringTwitsSofa?

I have biscuits.

mollymole · 17/05/2011 10:00

agree with yawnyhead - used to be a small size 10 - go to gym 3/4 times a week, healthy diet, walk most of the time - then had to go on medication (without it i will die) still go to gym, walk, eat healthy food but am now a size 12/14 not fat but certainly overweight - do i have to die so that i do not offend you or can i carry on taking my meds

kw1986 · 17/05/2011 10:00

I would guess I'm fat because I've always associated food as a treat/reward. So if I'm feeling bad I eat to feel better, feeling happy - I eat to celebrate. I've suffered with depression since I was 13/14 on and off. Its not like I woke up one day fat... But when you feel crap and you've got ice cream in your freezer, you always just think "tomorrow..." Tomorrow is another day, I'll start being good then.

I'm up at the heavier end of your examples, and I'm interested in what you mean by life limiting? My weight doesnt stop me doing anything - I go swimming with my DD, I go long country walks, I can still have sex, I can still dance, I can ride a bike... Maybe psychologically someones weight will stop them doing something, but I think for most people you have to be a bit bigger than 15/17/20 stone for it limit your life.

cannydoit · 17/05/2011 10:01

you know that mirror thing were skinny people look in the mirror and see a fat person oh whats it called..... body dismorphyia or something. i have that, but in reverse.

Mamaz0n · 17/05/2011 10:01

i reckon it is the same reason as people "let" themselves get cancer.
or "let" themselves look ugly
or "let" themselves have depression

twat

beesimo · 17/05/2011 10:04

I have always been a curvy size 14 until I had a riding accident when I put on 24lbs of fat in less than 2 months which was a astounding 3lb a week I honestly didn't realise until I was well enough to try and get a pair of trousers on that I had put on that amount of fat. Then when I weigh myself I had the shock of my life.

The reason I got so big so quickly.

Unable to live my normally very physical lifestyle due to broken bones and severe pain.

Having to eat sloppy food from MS Shepherds Pie, Lasanga,Rice Puddings, Creme Caramel all high calorie comfort food as I couldn't chew properly due to injuries.

Being frightened and upset and 'depressed' and comfort eating chocolate.

So OP lets hope everything stays fine for you and you never have any shocks or upsets that knock you off balance.You need to think before you speak OP life can get very hard very quickly.

BTH I have now got the weight off how- able to exercise again, I am as I suspect you are a quite vain woman and wanting to get into nice clothes was a good motivation factor for me, and we have enough money that I could go for fat reducing spa treatments. If I had still been in pain and depressed I would of put another 24lbs on by now.

boilingpoint · 17/05/2011 10:06

seriously?

Poor taste and very insulting to us 'fatties'

what an arsehole!

Ormirian · 17/05/2011 10:06

God! How right you are! Why didn't everyone think of that Hmm

ElfOnTheTopShelf · 17/05/2011 10:06

Why are people overweight and others are thin?
Why are people gay and others are straight?
Why are people labour supporters, and others are conservative?
Why do some people work and others do not?

How about, it takes a lot of people to make the world go around, and we really shouldn't spend our lives judging others.

MotherSnacker · 17/05/2011 10:06

I suggest you google obesity and genetics. Scientists do believe a proportion of it is down to genetic factors.

Compulsive eating is a complex psychological problem and people do eat for emotional reasons, couple that with fat genes and you have a morbidly obese person.

Have you not noticed the desperation some people have to lose weight yet they still fail? Or the bullying that obese people endure? Do you not think if they could do someting about it they would?

You must have lived under a bridge all your life.

Much easier to judge than educate yourself though.

cory · 17/05/2011 10:06

And Fuckmuncher is my word of the day now
Add message | Report | Message poster Chandon Tue 17-May-11 09:47:21
OP, not very carefully worded OP.

"But surely, I cannot be the only person who sees where you are coming from?

I see some huge people, and I wonder how they got to be that way. I am curious, in a way I wonder if it could happen to me."

And this is an important point. Whenever we see something that worries us we want to persuade ourselves that it couldn't possibly happen to us, that these people are different, wrong, morally inferior. It is not enough to point out the obvious- that in most cases there will probably be more calories going in than coming off- we also feel the need to assert that these people must be apathetic and self-hating. In other words, different, not just me as I might be if I eat a few more cakes.

TheMoistWorldOfSeptimusQuench · 17/05/2011 10:07

Just to counter the point made earlier about having to eat, yet not "having" to drink alcohol, smoke etc - I find it far, far easier to eat healthily than to stop smoking. But that's my personal battle with self discipline and we're all different.

JeremyKylesPetProject · 17/05/2011 10:08

Personally? Parent - Child food abuse. My mum routinely starved me and forced me to over exercise. I'd go to school starving so I'd steal food from lunchboxes or friends houses. Years of forced Yo-yo dieting have left me with hypothyroidism. The only way I can lose weight is by utter starvation. I have 3 kids to care for. I need my energy. If you ain't fat OP. Then well done to you. Lets hope your body remains faithful to your expectations.

Chandon · 17/05/2011 10:10

I don't think that having cancer can be compared with being too big.Hmm

As a big person can often slim down if they have to.

Someone with cancer cannot just decide that they'll do something about it.Hmm

I guess a lot of people see being too big as something that "happens to them" and in which they feel powerless (hence it being compared to cancer (!)).

Not sure that helps anyone though.

pickyourbrain · 17/05/2011 10:11

Maybe the poster was referring to "why do people smoke when they know it leads to cancer"

upsylazy · 17/05/2011 10:13

OP, I do secretly wonder that myself sometimes but that's because I have a fear of being overweight and am extremely disciplined about food. However , over the years I have developed a serious alcohol problem (approx 90 units per week) which I am now trying to address. I presume that if you met me you wouldn't be so judgey as you are about fat people because I don't look like an alcoholic.
I know that in theory all I have to do is not have a drink just as overweight people know that, to lose weight, they need to eat less. However, it's not that easy as I am finding out myself.
People who are struggling to lose weight, stop drinking/smoking/taking drugs need support, not holier than thou attitudes like yours.

GnomeDePlume · 17/05/2011 10:13

I'm fat because I eat too much and dont move enough. Is there another way?

Unhealthy is a tricky one beacause not everyone who is fat is unhealthy. Not everyone who is slim is healthy. Not everyone who is thin is healthy or unhealthy. Statistically, all extremes will tend to be unhealthy but that is the problem with statistics. None of us know which side of the graph we are going to land on. Being slim does not provide guarantees.

Yes I am unsightly so I hearby appologise to all the people who feel offended by the sight of my corpulence. If you are offended can I suggest you put blinkers on? Oh no, sorry you are already wearing them!

Being fat does not make me morally inferior to slim people. It just means that I stay warm in winter and get hot in summer.

BimboNo5 · 17/05/2011 10:15

Chandon may I just ask why it bothers you if people choose to 'let themselves' get fat? What odds does it actually make to you? Does it make you feel uncomfortable in some way?

ExpatAgain · 17/05/2011 10:15

well..op raises an interesting question at least.. We all generally try to drink, for example, in moderation (with the occasional lapse) so it is logical to extend this discipline to eating in moderation also..Why is that so bad? We ARE what we eat after all...

I think it's become much easier and much more culturally acceptable in the UK to overeat - have a coffee AND muffin, stop for petrol and grab a bag of crisps as well as 3 meals a day, no exercise..Obviously this has huge health implications - NHS bill for preventable obesity-related conditions is HUGE (pardon the pun) running into the billions for which the taxpayer is footing the bill in a time of cuts..

I'm surprised at how defensive some posters are - even those who are size 12/14! Such a size is obviously within the normal range and would rarely be overweight let alone obese so surely not relevant to the debate.

I think it's a shame not to be able to debate this issue freely and openly...

BimboNo5 · 17/05/2011 10:17

What is there to 'debate' though? Some people are fat, some people are thin. As I asked earlier why do we not have constant threads prying into the lives of skinny people? Why do we not demand to know WHY skinny people are skinny and assume its because they starve themselves?

SnuffleTurtle153 · 17/05/2011 10:18

First time I've done this.

Biscuit

Give it a good chew. Taste better than that self righteous vitriol you've been sucking on?

You knob.

pickyourbrain · 17/05/2011 10:18

bimbono5 and others. It does cost a lot of money to look after people who are very very fat. That's not to say I put any blame on them, any more than i do those with drug problems/ bulimia/anorexia etc.

Just making the point that if we're talking about the morbidly obese, it is all of our problem.

BimboNo5 · 17/05/2011 10:20

It costs money to look after gay people- they are far more likely to have cancer. Maybe they should just 'stop' being gay?

NotaMopsa · 17/05/2011 10:25

That'd be no ones fault then Hmm?

Thin people - it's easy for them innit - like nothing bad's ever happened in our lives and we've never been forced to go on weight gaining medication Hmm

These threads all go the same way you're only allowed to thin- bash

Chandon · 17/05/2011 10:25

bimbo, I guess it just makes me wonder if it could happen to me. I would hate to be overweight as I really enjoy sport, and then I could not do the things I enjoy any more (riding, tennis, running, gardening, playing rounders with the kids etc.).

I only feel sorry (or bothered) for obese people if they hate being big. If they like it and it's their choice, fine.