Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

To wonder why people let themselves get fat?

776 replies

Judgeywedgiepants · 17/05/2011 09:15

I am frequently amazed at the number of women at 15/17/20 stone who suddenly realise how fat they are and want to do something about it.
Why do people let themselves get so fat? It's unhealthy, unsightly and very life limiting.
Why not just keep an eye on your weight and keep it nice and steady?

OP posts:
CatPower · 17/05/2011 10:46

NotaMopsa, but is it science when you cannot exercise due to health reasons, or when it is illness/genetic conditions that are causing you to be overweight?

NotaMopsa · 17/05/2011 10:46

Elfontheshelf now that IS utter bull crap 'most smokers are thin' fgs

NotaMopsa · 17/05/2011 10:47

Catpower eat less

Longtalljosie · 17/05/2011 10:47

Not so much actually, NotaMopsa - have a read of this.

I don't necessarily agree with all of his solutions, but the studies casting doubt on the calories-in calories-out theory. I don't buy his argument wholesale, but it's fascinating reading, and gives some food for thought (sorry) on more extreme obesity.

youngwomanwholivesinashoe · 17/05/2011 10:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Chynah · 17/05/2011 10:48

Love the way the OP is labelled 'offensive' when so far they have have been called

Twat
Fuckmuncher
wanker
to name but a few and told to go f*ck themselves!

and this from people who are asking not to be judged Confused

CatPower · 17/05/2011 10:49

How less are we talking, NotaMopsa? Because right now I'm having fruit salad from breakfast, tuna and veg for lunch and steamed chicken for dinner and I'm overweight. Or should I go back to throwing up everything to conform to what you consider to be appropriate weight?

ExpatAgain · 17/05/2011 10:49

of course obesity due to illness/medication is a different matter but in most cases, obesity IS preventable in that it can be alleviated/avoided through a normal diet and normal exercise..

ElfOnTheTopShelf · 17/05/2011 10:50

NotaMopsa - I did clearly say that most smokers I MYSELF PERSONALLY know are thin. Not that its a general observation of the whole world.

pickyourbrain · 17/05/2011 10:51

bimbono5 You selcetively read my post... I said I wasnt putting any blame on people who are morbidly obese or the money they cost the NHS, I was making the point that it is our business because we all pay for the morbidly obese to be looked after in ill health. It is not our place to judge or be rude or critical, but it is our business to ponder/ worry/ discuss/ the causes because it affects all of us. The same as excessive smoking/ sex without contraception/ anorexia/ drug abuse...

as an aside, I am genuinely shocked that gay people are more likely to get cancer and am off to google..

LooloosMummy · 17/05/2011 10:51

i think it is probably because you don't notice it slowly creeping on when you have such a busy life and everyone else to run around after, you just grab anything to eat to keep you going/ don't get a chance to eat get starving hungry then shove your face full of everything you can find! then all of a sudden you notice your clothes don't fit so you buy bigger, elasticated waist bands for comfort etc and before you notice it your getting quite heavy. coming from someone who was once 9 1/2 stone and one day woke up just shy of 15 stone. and thought ouch i put on quite a bit of weight! but honestly you really don't notice it creeping on until it becomes an issue. HTH :) (there is also more people than we realise with eating disorders as people don't really discuss it or aren't willing to admit they have a problem with food so theres not really a wide spread knowledge of the amount of ill people there are)

pickyourbrain · 17/05/2011 10:54

okay just looked it up. so the study is a very early study and not properly researched yet. They think it may be to do with HIV causing certain cancers and also anal cancer... It's gay men only. No link between cancer and gay females.

DontCallMePeanut · 17/05/2011 10:55

NotaMopsa, would you care to tell that to my best friend? Currently eats a vegetarian diet, doesn't eat chocolate, doesn't eat much in the way of carbs, but cannot exercise much due to the pain she's in if she DOES try to do too much.

Or sometimes, she's in so much pain she cannot move at all. And that pain isn't related to her weight; it's the condition which caused her to put on so much weight. She's currently at 17 stone. Her weight doesn't shift.

Olifin · 17/05/2011 10:56

I think 'fat phobia' does exist for some people (women usually) but I also think there are slim, healthy people who are not fat-phobic but rather really enjoy being slim and feeling healthy and want to encourage others to try the same. Regular exercise and a healthy diet has tons of benefits besides keeping you slim. You're more likely to sleep better and have a good libido for starters :)

I feel sad for obese people just as I feel sad for people who are at the other end of the spectrum with anorexia/bulimia. Whilst the latter is certainly a psychological condition, the former can be but isn't always. No-one is anorexic or bulimic simply through not caring or not paying enough attention to their lifestyle whereas that is sometimes the case for people who are overweight or obese.

I don't find obese people unsightly but I do feel sorry for them. Particularly when I see an entire family of very obese people, as I did a couple of days ago. (Including a child of less than 2 years who was very very large for her height). This cannot be down to medication or even depression, as I would hope the children aren't depressed. This family may have had a genetic predisposition towards storing more fat than the average person but it is surely most likely that their proportions were down to their diet and lack of activity. The contents of their picnic supported this. For the record, I did NOT judge them, I felt very sorry for them, especially the children. When it is so ingrained in a family, how can they be helped? Who should be helping them? (Genuine question)

lockets · 17/05/2011 10:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

pickyourbrain · 17/05/2011 10:58

lockets I'm not a fan of the nasty OP either but i would question if most people who are 20 stone are happy and fulfilled and that their weight was not stopping them getting what they want out of life Hmm

PinotGrigiosKittens · 17/05/2011 11:01

Has the OP changed name part way through this? There can't be 2/3/4 people so offensive, surely?

lockets · 17/05/2011 11:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ExpatAgain · 17/05/2011 11:02

olifin - completely agree!

JeremyKylesPetProject · 17/05/2011 11:03

I'm the only fatty in my family. I'm well accustomed to people trying to sneak a peek in my trolley when I shop. If they were looking at my picnic food I'd offer them a butty. :o

I once saw a supermarket worker take a chubby little boy who was lost over to a large woman and ask if he was her son then to another large woman... he was eventually claimed by a petite and slim lady. I loved how she presumed that his mum must be chubby too.

DontCallMePeanut · 17/05/2011 11:04

Pinot, I was wondering the same...

Pickyourbrain: happiness is not about weight. It's about how you perceive your life yourself. Otherwise, my 8st self would have been happier than my 12st self.

StayingDavidTennantsGirl · 17/05/2011 11:04

I am fat because I have suffered from depression since my mid teens because I was bullied at school. Maybe the fat is an extra layer of protection to stop myself getting hurt - or maybe it is just a slower way of committing suicide - and believe me, there have been countless occasions when I have actively considered suicide. I'm not suicidal now, but death doesn't seem like a bad option or something to be scared of - it seems like the ultimate release.

Mind you, Chandon and the OP probably think I deserve to be dead and the world would be better off without me.

CatPower · 17/05/2011 11:06

I'm not happy being the size I am, of course I'm not. Contrary to popular belief I am trying my damnedest to lost weight before the operation that will (hopefully) preserve my hip, but being unable to exercise effectively is not helping matters at all. And yes, I am depressed about my condition, the operation, the constant pain I'm in, the amount of painkillers I have to take each day just to function at a semi-normal level, and shock horror, when people are depressed about something they may comfort eat so the situation just gets worse.

I am doing the best I can in a very difficult situation, and posts like the OP's do not help one little bit. Being fat isn't a cut and dried issue, you can't judge all overweight people by the same yardstick.

Al0uiseG · 17/05/2011 11:13
Olifin · 17/05/2011 11:14

It's not illegal to look at people's picnics. It's easily done when they're sitting right in front of you. If you're implying that I was only looking because they were large, you're wrong. I love food and would look at anyone's picnic.

(Think the last sentence maybe the weirdest thing I've ever said)