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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

I recently saw the most PECULIAR thing...

428 replies

BlooferLady · 15/05/2011 21:52

I saw the oddest thing the other day and can't stop thinking about what in the name of all that's holy and precious was going on. AIBU to ask you what you think, so I can get some sleep?

I was waiting for someone outside the British Library on Euston Rd. Beside me a casually dressed man was making a placating phone call, and anxiously watching the road. He was holding a clipboard and a small white envelope, and carrying an ordinary blue cool-box, such as you might use for a picnic.

Eventually a flustered looking couple turned up. They were both in their early 40s, and looked fairly well-to-do. They were obviously rather anxious, possibly because they were late, and relieved to see Clipboard Man. I couldn't hear what they were saying no matter how hard I tried, but I could see Clipboard Man being sort of authoritative and reassuring. He kept gesturing to the cool-box, and handed over the envelope with some ceremony. The woman said nothing, only continued to look rather anxious.

Clipboard Man then hailed a cab. The man in the couple protested mildly, but the other man said something along the lines of it all being sorted and paid for, and ushered the woman in. She sat on the edge of the seat clutching the white envelope. Clipboard man leaned into the cab to give the driver instructions, and had what looked like a reassuring and authoritative word with the man. The man patted Clipboard Man's shoulder once or twice in a gesture that looked sort of grateful, in a business-like fashion, then got into the cab next to his partner. Clipboard Man then put the cool-box onto the floor of the cab, slammed the door, had one last brisk word with the driver, and waved the cab off.

He then made one or two notes on the clipboard, and hurried back along the Euston Rd without looking back.

WTF was that all about then?! I damn nearly ran after Clipboard Man to ask, but thought if there was owt dodgy going on I might be found strung up by piano wire somewhere...

OP posts:
LadyClariceCannockMonty · 19/05/2011 16:12

Bollocks to Birkenstocks and big baggy T-shirts.

Finallyspring · 19/05/2011 16:14

Flouncing off to your BALLOON are you ?

Finallyspring · 19/05/2011 16:16

'Bollocks to Birkenstocks and Big Baggy T Shirts' that was a song by Lily Allen wasn't it ?

LadyClariceCannockMonty · 19/05/2011 16:24

You wouldn't get me in a balloon for love nor money.

Grin at Lily Allen.

Finallyspring · 19/05/2011 16:37

Well you're obviously a strong woman with a secure sense of self. You can say no to ballooning and know that it does not conflict with your female identity. But spare a thought for anxious woman in the taxi. We need to think of her, and many others like her who are oppressed by this tyranny.

I'm constructing a banner at command HQ which needs to be carried at all future demos. There's a conspiracy of silence around this issue.

LadyClariceCannockMonty · 19/05/2011 16:53

Yes, you're right.

Maybe she'd feel more confident if I lent her my lovely shoes and lippy?

Samjam10 · 19/05/2011 18:14

Anyone got a light?

Finallyspring · 19/05/2011 18:45

I've got an appalling gin hangover samjam I can't move right now. lady clarice has a lighter in her delightful beaded evening bag.

Are you back on board ? Our immediate priority is rescuing anxious woman from the bonds of patriarchy

sc2987 · 19/05/2011 19:55

Maybe the man had bought an experience-in-a-box (like driving a racecar, or going to a concert) for his partner as a surprise (hence her nervousness as she isn't sure what's happening). The man with the clipboard is the rep from the experience company, which has an account with the taxi firm. The envelope contained the experience tickets, and the cool box had some champagne in it.

Finallyspring · 19/05/2011 20:12

experience-in-a box. Brilliant !

But what kind of experience I wonder ?

Fab123 · 20/05/2011 01:03

Well I, for one, am glad we've moved away from the sperm in a box.

Fab123 · 20/05/2011 01:04

Or have we.
What kind of "experience" indeed... Shock

That's a lot of 'permy tozas.

Finallyspring · 20/05/2011 07:51

It would be a LOT of sperm

Lunabelly · 20/05/2011 08:30

QUICK! What's the collective noun for a bunch of jizzy komodos?

Fab123 · 20/05/2011 10:28

Kumodiz?

LadyClariceCannockMonty · 20/05/2011 16:07

Oops, sorry, took me a while.

Finallyspring · 20/05/2011 18:38

There you go samjam get smokin'

It's Friday evening in the underground speakeasy and we need be be getting down to some serious planning. I think the way forward has to be a reconstruction of the events in question. This will involve dressing up as the characters involved and recreating the scene on that fateful day. We also need: Cool box ( including contents ), envelope, clipboard, navy fleece and London taxi ( plus driver )

As always, I have to stay at a distance from operations in order to get on with my life maintain the rational objectivity and cool detachment necessary for such a large and serious undertaking. But we need volunteers on the ground.

LadyClariceCannockMonty · 20/05/2011 19:48

Am away doing unspeakably glamorous things in a smallish sleepyish city den of glittering and debauched iniquity this weekend.

But I'll be back with fags, refreshed lippy and resoled new killer spy heels next week.

Dollface.

parno · 20/05/2011 20:10

It was a head in the cool box and a mouse in the evelope.

Finallyspring · 20/05/2011 20:46

A Mouse ? What ? OMG Why ? Why in an envelope ? < heads spins with questions>

Finallyspring · 20/05/2011 20:46

A Mouse ? What ? OMG Why ? Why in an envelope ? < heads spins with questions>

Finallyspring · 20/05/2011 20:47

Repeatedly, apparently

Lunabelly · 21/05/2011 08:28

AH! They were filming 'Se7en II' ! But this time, the hero is an impotent komodo dragon instead of Brad Pitt.

Yes.

LadyClariceCannockMonty · 24/05/2011 17:28

Who's the killer? A Galapagos tortoise?

Finallyspring · 24/05/2011 18:02

Yes ! I think she's got it. ladyclarice has cracked the secret of it ALL and moreover, she looks fantastic in heels

But what I wanted to say so desperately last week but couldn't was that it was Ryan Giggs in the taxi. Ryan Giggs, Ryan Giggs yes it was.

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