Really had it with my neighbour, I just spoke to her husband

[nightime]

I have posted about her before, not sure how to link but if you search my name you will see. if someone can tell me how to link a thread I will.

A couple of months ago she accused me of grassing her up to her employers about being off sick when she wasn't. News to me. I couldnt give a flying fuck what she does, I dont like being accused of something I havn't done though.

Spoke to her at the time and she said, ok I believe it wasn't you ect but since then me and my kids can't go in our garden without getting evil looks from her either at the window or at her back door, my cat just doesn't know whats going on as she used to encourage him to go in their house and put water out for him, now he shits himself when she opens the door.

I have not spoken to her about it since as I still feel that she owes me an apology for accusing me and when we have been in our gardens at the same time she ignores me and she has not accused any of our other neighbours.

It has been getting me down as both myself and the kids do not feel comfortable in the garden anymore as she is either at the window giving us evils or at her back door with a face like a slapped arse.

Tonight I was in my garage when her husband came home so I decided to ask him why she was still being an arse with us, he knew nothing about her accusing me, he had a totally different story to her about her work stuff, he said he will speak to her,

He seemed totally surprised that there was a problem at all,

Was I being unreasonble by talking to him?

Here you go:

link to previous thread

No, I think YANBU in speaking to him.

No - YANBU.

Thankyou for linking that Mandy how did you do it? lol

Um well nightime, go to advanced search button just above phase of the moon pic on top right of page and search by, in this case, your name. Look down the list till you find the thread you want, open it, copy the address out of the address bar by highlighting with your cursor, make sure you've got it all, then press Ctrl (bottom left on your keyboard) and letter C key.

Next, instructions for this are just below the box you type your message in but here you go: press the square bracket key twice then paste (Ctrl and V) your link inside. Do one space bar and type what you want to call your link, usually "this" or "here" or as I did "link to previous thread. Then close the square brackets twice

Oh Gods can you tell I'm a frustrated IT teacher! HTH

I have just had enough now, I hoped when I was in the garage (for longer than I needed to be) that he would turn up,

I do not want to talk to her at the moment unless she talks to me first as I do feel the wronged person in this situation.

Plus and i'm not being racist or anything here but he does speak better English and I feel both he and I understand each other better.

He really didnt seem to know that she had accused me of anything, he was going on about her workmates teasing her about singing in the evening, I'm still confused abit but said what I needed to say,

She prob still won't talk to me as I've spoken to him but I needed to say something to someone and he seemed the obvious person as he seems a really approachable man.

Lol Thanks Mandy

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/1174597-To-think-in-a-cul-de-sac-of-30-or-more-houses-when-someone-says-a-neighbour-grassed-you-up-its-not-on-to-accuse-just-me-cos-I-live-next-door

Just practising

it didnt work lol

It did, honest I can see it! If you don't want the whole link to come up don't forget the single space after pasting and write your own words to describe it, close brackets!

Your link worked nighttime

YANBU she sounds like a loon, dont let her see she
is getting to you. Ignore her [easier said than done i know]

YANBU - she sounds a bit nutty TBH - good luck

& thank you Mandy - single space - I've been trying forever to do that & never could - THATS what I was doing wrong - no space :)

Me too rockin

I'll have to practice that later. Thanks mandy

I think you do have to question whether she is perhaps mentally ill. She doesn't has any basis whatsoever for her claim and that fact that her husband doesn't have a clue either makes it all the stranger.

Just grow some fast growing evergreen tall bushes so you don't have to see her everytime you go out.

It doesn't strike me as an unreasonable thing to do, but I don't know how well your neighbour will take it anyway.

Think it may cause some bother between them, and she may take it out on you, but I don't think you were in the wrong for mentioning it to him

I will try that in a minute thanks Mandy

everyone else please understand I am learninig if I link again. lol

As far as im concerned something needed to be said and I don't feel I can talk to her, Two days ago I was getting in my washing, my kids were at the kitchen table talking to each other and to me, I have patio doors which were wide open. she was just standing at her back door glaring at me, I didnt want to make a fuss as the kids were there,

My heart was pumping as I was well fuming but I held back as I didn't wanna involve my kids. they are 15 and 18 so they know a bit and would jump in if they felt I needed them.

When they moved in 2 years ago I never envisioned any probs with them, I have been friendly from the start, they welcomed Alfie {my cat) put water out for him and encouaged him into their house.

I cannot see us women being friends now to be honest as I do not forgive easily and maybe if she had accused other neighbours and not just me it would be easier to forgive if she admitted she was wrong and apologised to me.

I can live without being her friend but I do not see why my kids and I should feel uncomfortable in our garden now for no reason of our own when we have lived here for 13 years yet she has only been here for 2 years.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/1174597-To-think-in-a-cul-de-sac-of-30-or-more-houses-when-someone-says-a-neighbour-grassed-you-up-its-not-on-to-accuse-just-me-cos-I-live-next-door (link to previous thread)

I am trying lol

ahh still dont get it

I would just use the garden as normal and blank her house out completely.

You don't know for sure she's glaring at you thinking about your argument, it's possible she might be thinking about other problems she's having.

It doesn't matter how long either of you have lived there, you don't have any more claim to be happy there than she does

But I'm worried because of what you've said about your cat, what has she done to make him shit himself if she opens the door do you think?

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/1174597-To-think-in-a-cul-de-sac-of-30-or-more-houses-when-someone-says-a-neighbour-grassed-you-up-its-not-on-to-accuse-just-me-cos-I-live-next-door (previous thread)

I am still trying lol

ahh i give up, I cant do it please forgive me

nightime Like this but with instead of {{ }}

{{http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/1174597-To-think-in-a-cul-de-sac-of-30-or-more-houses-when-someone-says-a-neighbour-grassed-you-up-its-not-on-to-accuse-just-me-cos-I-live-next-door previous thread}}

Agent I agree that we have have no more right to be happy than her, no matter of how long we have lived here,

My kids are teenagers now so do not need the garden as much as they used to, it's mainly me that uses it, hanging out washing and sitting out there to get awat from the teenagers indoors, lol

As for my cat. he is nearly 7, up untill they moved in 2 years ago my previous neighbours had a famale cat. the two cats shared gardens, think they both thought of both gardens as their terratories,

when the current neighbours moved in they loved my cat, they encorouged him to enter their house (I didn't really like this as was worried about him escaping out front) he is not used to going out front cos of the cars,

I spoke to them about this and they assured me that they wouldnt let him out front, they put a water bowl in their garden for him and constantly called and petted him. Now she just growls at him if he enters her garden.

I do not watch him or next door constantly so I am not aware of everything, but I have become aware that when she opens their back door, if he is in their garden then he jumps the very dodgy fence to home.