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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think this was ungrateful and maybe a bit snobby?

133 replies

LifeIsButtercream · 07/05/2011 18:50

I friend recently had a first birthday party for her DD, I have a limited budget but found a really gorgeous outfit from Asda which had a character on that my friend's DD is 'obsessed' with, and posted this over to them as a pressie.

I spoke to said friend a few days later, and she was blah blah about her DD's birthday and all the lovely clothes people had given her. She then went on to say that some people had only given clothes from Asda or Tesco, and these 'had to go straight in the bin', as her DD only wears clothes from 'Next, and above'.........

I was a bit hmph, and didn't mention the gift I'd sent, but made my excuses and left the conversation. I felt a bit grrrrr that not only had she chucked my gift away, but she hadn't even remembered what I'd given (it was a week ago) - call me mad but I make a note when DD opens presents so I can at least pretend I have written thank you cards and thank people.

Besides, Next and above? Do labels really matter at 1yr old?

Or am I on another planet?

OP posts:
textfan · 07/05/2011 22:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BrandyAlexander · 07/05/2011 22:36

Incredible. My mil can't seem to walk past Asda or Sainsburys without getting DD clothes so we have had some great presents from there. Your (hopefully now ex) friend is one of the snobbiest and rudest people I have ever ever heard about.

FreudianSlipOnACrown · 07/05/2011 22:38

Shock at the OP will catch up later...

SherlockHolmes · 07/05/2011 22:38

People who have these kinds of ideas obviously have something missing in their lives. It's downright rude and ignorant to not thank you and to be so insensitive. PMSL at "Next and above".

maighdlin · 07/05/2011 22:41

she is worried that people would judge if DD wears clothes from ASDA, yet has this snobby attitude?? Confused

her child will grow up to be a lovely person Hmm

glad you ditched the bitch.

diggingintheribs · 07/05/2011 22:46

She's clearly a weirdo with no common sense (why be such a snob about clothes for a toddler!!) or social skills (she could have quietly given it to a charity shop and sent you a thank you card instead of being so rude

DS lives in gap and H&M because it fits him perfectly but I always buy in sale. Nursery clothes are whatever I can buy cheapest! Whenever I am in a supermarket I always check the clothes to get good bargains (got a lovely TU dress half price for dd today). Like you say, they'll either be trashed or they'll grow out of them in 5 mins.

For DD she has loads of designer because my cousins in laws went nuts when her DD was born - some haven't even been worn. Feel bad having sent her all DS's scraggy old gap stuff for her new DS!!

KaraStarbuckThrace · 07/05/2011 22:51

Flisspaps- I was also thinking she and Babyzilla would get on rather well!

LifeisButtercream - she is a nasty piece of work. I would have asked for the present back and tell her to go fuck herself. I can't believe how rude this woman has been!

BootyMum · 07/05/2011 22:58

I can't believe that people like this actually exist!

What would your friend think of people like me - I dress DS1 & 2 in charity shop and supermarket brands mainly with the occasional Boden, Next and Gap when they are on sale. Actually can't tell the difference between the outfits when children are wearing them as all start looking a little rough once they have been muddied/puked on/pooed on and then run through the wash a few times.

Unbelievable to me that someone admitted in an earlier post to having dressed their children in Prada!

1944girl · 07/05/2011 23:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

kalo12 · 07/05/2011 23:03

snobby? I think the fact that your 'friend' lacks the most basic good manners makes her down right common imo. Are you sure she's not a chav?

JeremyKylesPetProject · 07/05/2011 23:11

She sounds utterly horrific. Think of it this way. It cost you a tenner to get a selfish and materialistic cow vamoosed out of your life. Bargain if you ask me.

pigletmania · 07/05/2011 23:36

What a horrid person, next time don't give her anything. Sounds similar to another recent thread of a MNetter whose baby gifts were rejected and told to buy new more expensive gifts off the gift list. The rudeness is Shock, actually I don't find any difference between Asda/Matalan clothes and that of Next tbh.

pigletmania · 07/05/2011 23:39

Even the Queen or Royal family would not behave like that, I heard that the older Royals are quite thrifty.

pigletmania · 07/05/2011 23:40

The manners displayed by some is appealing, even if she does not like them don't tell everyone like its something to be proud of, give them to Charity instead where somebody would be more than grateful for them Angry

onceamai · 07/05/2011 23:42

Pigletmania - I think some of them would have looked a little more elegant in George Grin

pigletmania · 07/05/2011 23:46

He he he like Princess Eugenie and Beatrice Grin. I have read more posts and this woman have issues she really has, like her self esteem is so low that she thinks people will judge her child on what she wears. Really some supermarket, cheap high street shops have really lovely clothes that you cannot tell unless you asked the mum. I have bought some lovely things for dd from H&M that look like it came from a boutique as well as from ASDA and Matalan.

partyhats · 07/05/2011 23:49

What a stupid woman! She sounds completely awful, I'm stunned by her behaviour and you should be glad she is no longer a friend.

StayingDavidTennantsGirl · 07/05/2011 23:50

I would tell this woman that people are far more likely to judge her for her rudeness and grasping attitude to presents than for what her daughter wears.

I have dressed the dses in a mix of clothes over the years - everything from oshkosh (when I could get it second hand and cheap) to asda. I buy almost all their school uniform from asda, because it looks just the same as the uniform from M&S or John Lewis - but is a fraction of the price, so I don't stress when they go through the knees or rip them.

And when they were little, I got as much as possible from the nearly-new sales, because they grew out of everything so fast - as had the previous wearers, so I got good condition clothes for pence. It makes no sense whatsoever to buy expensive clothes for a child that could grow out of them in weeks or months.

I would love to have a chance to tell this woman what I think of her lack of manners and her unpleasant treatment of her friend!

piprabbit · 07/05/2011 23:56

Silly woman is prepared to throw away real friendships on the grounds that a stranger may judge a small baby's clothes.

If she carries on like this, then she will be left with only the friends she deserves. Her poor DD Sad.

startail · 08/05/2011 00:11

YANBU,
And your "friend" is a prat. DD2's last party dress was from Sainsbury's, it was every bit as nice as her present three times the price Monsoon one (and creased less). (She only owns this because wedding grade dresses for over 8's seem to be very hard to find).
DD wore her Sainsbury's dress to a birthday party where she was undoubtedly the least posh person there, I was a bit nervous expecting everyone else's girls to be in Boden and Monsoon. They were all in very pretty dresses, which their Mum's freely admitted were from MATALAN Smile

newportstateofmind · 08/05/2011 00:13

Shock Shock What a nasty piece of work!!!

I can't decide which is worse....being so up herself that she has an issue with ASDA clothes or thinking that this is more important than a friend's generosity.

How dare she treat you like that. You're clearly well shot of her.

Horrible, horrible woman.

kelpie6333 · 08/05/2011 00:36

That is just plain rude. ASDA has great character clothes (Peppa Pig and Waybaloos) which my DD loves!

It shouldn't matter where the clothes come from but she should have been touched that you actually knew the character that her DD liked and sent a gift that her 'daughter' would like, because the gift was in fact, for her!

I can't believe she would be so ungrateful and to your face at that. Who raised this woman? I would cross her off your XMAs card list.

scottishmummy · 08/05/2011 00:47

how rude,a gift given and she bellyaching about brand

hell no my weans are tesco,asda -thats what nursery is about running in park.i dont sweat it about kids clothes

kidzrfreaky · 08/05/2011 00:49

Tell her that seeing as she does not like Asda clothes you would like to have the item back to return it to the store to get your dd's size instead. Watch her squirm when she has to tell you she has thrown it in the bin. Cheeky bitch!

fancyachange · 08/05/2011 08:29

YANBU your 'friend' is stupid. what a waste to throw out good clothes. I love Asda childrens clothes and they are very good for character stuff. Plus for me Asda is just down the road and is 24 hour so very useful when ds gives last minute warning that they are having some sort of dress up day at school with clothes of certain colours etc.

"Next and above" ??? Confused Can someone explain to me what order the shops go in?

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