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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

David Cameron tells Angela Eagle to "calm down dear" at PMQ

714 replies

Bennifer · 27/04/2011 13:25

I posted this in feminism but think this is appalling, if true.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-13211577

OP posts:
PrincessScrumpy · 28/04/2011 17:24

The Speaker had already told the woman to shut up so perhaps if she'd done as she was told and behaved appropriately there would have been no need for the remark! If that's the worst she's had to deal with in the workplace I think she's fairly lucky. Really don't think it's a big issue compared to the real issues in society and government at the moment - get a grip and some perspective.

madamimadam · 28/04/2011 17:38

Dear Lilmeena,
Thank you for your kind missive, which I have digested.

May I entreat you to visit istyosty in haste. It allows you to read DM, Sun etc without upping their visitor numbers, so you can dirty your mind, but your fingers remain unblemished. If not your conscience.

Yours in perfidity,
Madam

(ps Dave, in case your advisers are reading, I believe the works of Bernard Manning & Roy 'Chubby' Brown could also be a rich source of material for your next PMQs. Reel those 'lady' votes right in...)

HerBEggs · 28/04/2011 18:31

Ah I see the mysogynists and their handmaidens are out in force. Grin

All these uppity women expecting the world to change to accomodate them.

I mean it's outrageous.

They're only half the human race. Who the fuck do they think they are? Don't they know that it is only right and proper that the world is organised for the convenience of the superior half of the human race?

And aren't they shrill when they notice that that's what some men really think while they pay lip service to women's full humanity and therefore full right to expect the world to cahnge to accomodate them.

You couldn't make it up. Grin

Lilmeena · 28/04/2011 18:33

Dear M

Thank you for suggesting I visit the site 'Istyosty' .
Unfortunately I will not be visiting this website as I don't like the name - it's silly and sounds like the 5th teletubby - however, I appreciate your concerns and will endeavour to keep my DM habit under control.

Yours in purgatory

Lilmeena

aliceliddell · 28/04/2011 19:15

HerBEggs - "shrill?" Whaddya mean "shrill?" Don't you mean "strident"?

lullabybaby · 28/04/2011 20:06

Oh bum. The boring women-hating men who inhabit most other internet discussion boards have all come to mumsnet for this thread. I'm off.

LuckyWeKeptTheCot · 28/04/2011 20:17

HerBEggs - "Misogynists and their handmaidens." (Note the spelling). Thinking a Prime Minister has a shit sense of humour and that's all there is to this storm in a tea cup isn't evidence of hatred of females purely because they are female. And you wonder why people think you're overreacting? Wow! The problem isn't the women's sense of humour - it's his. And the women are just making a load of fuss about nothing. Will go off this pathetic thread now since I have allowed myself to take part in this - much more important things to worry about. I have a friend teaching women in Afghanistan. Aren't we lucky to have so little to worry about we can complain about something as petty as this?

NanaNina · 28/04/2011 20:18

I haven't read every post but enough to feel very sad that so many women do not think Cameron's remark to Angela Eagle was sexist (men aren't referred to as dear) at worst and at best patronising and a way of scoring a point because Angela was pointing out to him that he had his information wrong. So many women are saying Angela should just accept that it was all part of PMQs or something similar. If any of those posters read Guardian 2 today, they will see that Angela is most definitely rising above it and is making no complaint. Ed Balls shouted that Cameron should apologise, but I don't think his credentials are shiny bright on the issue of equality between men and women. When asked what Yvette Cooper would have done had he said that to her at home, he replied "she would have socked me one"

I was in the Women's Movement in the 70s as a young woman, fighting for equality and what a struggle it was - I am saddened that so many young women (as I assume most MNs are) are not enlightened enough to see this for what it was.

LuckyWeKeptTheCot · 28/04/2011 20:21

Sorry - still here. Why is it sexist to call someone 'dear'? I am often called dear by older women, as is my husband. Are men not allowed to say it? (I know DC wasn't using it in a kindly context - but that's the point - PMQ is a big infantile bunfight - they love treading lame insults - do it all the time - on all sides. Hasn't anyone noticed this?)

thehappyprince · 28/04/2011 21:05

Bloody hell. I wouldn't call myself a feminist but am shocked that there are women that think it is ok. Gobsmacked.

Dad2HandC · 28/04/2011 21:27

For goodness sake. It was PMQs - a punch and judy show still - despite Cameron's wish to stop that. Still remember the put down comment to the then Labour Chief Whip - Jacqui Smith when Cameron took over as leader of the opposition - about ya-boo politics - before she started charging the taxpayer for her husband's adult viewing habits.

Michael Winner should sue for copyright infringement.
It's only an advert!

NotaMopsa · 28/04/2011 21:30

Being called 'dear is patronising
I would be offended if an 'equal' called me it

MoreBeta · 28/04/2011 22:23

It may have been a patronising put down - but it does not make it sexist just because it was said to a woman.

NotaMopsa · 28/04/2011 22:34

how many 'old dears' are men?? Hmm

Lauder · 28/04/2011 22:54

With all the things going on in the world and the BCC gaves this rubbish quite a bit opf air time - GET A GRIP.

NotaMopsa · 28/04/2011 23:03

I think we are concerned that we are being goverened by a condescending misogynistic Lauder Hmm

HerBEggs · 28/04/2011 23:37

" Thinking a Prime Minister has a shit sense of humour and that's all there is to this storm in a tea cup isn't evidence of hatred of females purely because they are female. And you wonder why people think you're overreacting? Wow!"

Er, did you actually read the rest of what I posted Lucky? Because if you did, and you'd read the rest of the thread, you'd know what I was getting at.

But thanks for your advice on us all being grateful that we get much bigger crumb portions than the tiny crumbs the women in Afghanistan get, so we should stop bothering to discuss this. Do you tell the women in Style and Beauty to stop whingeing about the fact that they can't get a nice summer outfit because if they lived in Afghanistan they'd have to wear burkhas? Or is it only when women point out something not good enough from a feminist angle, that you feel the need to tell them they shouldn't be discussing whatever it is they are discussing because there's something bigger and more important that they ought to be discussing?

Someone helpfully posted the link to the feminism 101's why are you discussing x when you should be discussing y page. You might want to take a quick look at it, you'll recognise yourself. And if you want to discuss your friend's work in Afghanistan, here's a thing, you can start a thread about it. And I'm sure you'll get lots of people wanting to discuss it with you. And hopefully, no one will post something along the lines of "why are you discussing this when climate change is the most important issue as if the world gets consumed by floods, there'll be no burkhas anyway."

MayBankHoliday · 28/04/2011 23:41

Great post HerBEggs

irushforth · 29/04/2011 00:05

Whether you found Cameron's outburst offensive or amusing, you might like this, my topical but amateurish attempt at a poster for the 'Yes to AV' campaign:

a5.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc6/225005_2031322429554_1438934347_2371755_3021935_n.jpg

Thruaglassdarkly · 29/04/2011 00:57

Basically, Cameron made the joke a few years ago to a MALE MP who was getting out of hand. I strongly resent the fact that Balls and Silliband see it now as an "issue" because he addressed the same comment to a female MP. Either a) they think that women really ARE inferior and therefore need protecting from such generalised put downs or b) they are point scoring in the light of upcoming local elections. Either way, they're hypocrits and quite disgusting. Makes me hate them even more actually.

minieggfannomore · 29/04/2011 05:03

Agree with Ninanana. All you women who think it is perfectly OK for Cameron to act like this - WISE UP. He may want your vote but he is not on your side.

nottirednow · 29/04/2011 08:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Lilmeena · 29/04/2011 08:55

Thruaglassdarkly; yes you've nailed it. it's typical Labour behaviour ( hypocritical and pathetic ) DC wouldn't have thought about the gender issue because he's not programmed to think women are inferior or need protecting .Labour play on the fears and insecurities of feminists, (whilst secretly not giving a toss what DC said) because it's the Labour party who want to keep women in their place ( don't call them 'dear' they could have PMS and go bonkers ) -
I've been totally amazed at some of the posts on this thread - I will never understand why intelligent women feel so slighted over something so trivial - I can only put it down to massive insecurities & a need to be constantly talking about themselves. And feminists wonder why the stereotypical image of them is always negative ( anti-male, bitter, humourless etc )

It's a shame really because getting hysterical over non-issues undermines the good work feminists do and alienates people from them even further.
It was a joke - if it had been the other way around you'd all be applauding.
That's where you go wrong.

ccpccp · 29/04/2011 10:16

Good post Lilmeena

Swedes2 · 29/04/2011 10:18

Miliband was practically wetting himself with laughter after Cameron made the joke; unbridled laughter was a very odd reaction if Miliband really thought it was sexist and offensive.

You've dived, appealed to the ref, the ref says no penalty, the action replay confirms the ref was right. It really is time to move on to something with a bit more substance.

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