Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think taking kids to a civil partnership is no different from taking them to a wedding?

111 replies

namechange5635 · 26/04/2011 16:29

Namechanged because things are bad between me and (not-so-D)H at the moment as it is and I don't want people I know on here to know that.

Had an invitation through the door today to the civil partnership (ceremony and reception) of quite a good friend of mine. Husband has already said he will come with me (we knew the invite was on its way).

He got home from work just now and I told him the invitation had arrived and that I'd put the date on the calendar. He said "Oh, ok, I suppose we'll have to arrange childcare. Maybe my mum will be able to babysit". I told him the invite was for all of us, DCs included. He immediately looked horrified and said that of course we couldn't take the kids to a gay wedding. I gave him a Hmm look and he muttered something about it being inappropriate. He's now sitting on his arse watching the cricket and refusing to talk about it.

DCs are 8 and 1, btw. Obviously DS (1) will be too young to understand what's going on anyway, but DD has met the couple in question and understands that they are getting married, much like any other couple would.

I'm not being unreasonable to think he's being an absolutely massive, immature twat, am I?

OP posts:
tholeon · 26/04/2011 19:55

that is a lovely story runaway wife!

there's far too much consensus on this thread - can't we have a few wrongthinking bigots on to liven it up a bit??

BigSooz · 26/04/2011 19:56

roaring at the Onion

If I were a lesbian, this would have really made me feel awful about myself."

PMSL

FriedEggyAndSlippery · 26/04/2011 19:56

Omg that link!!! Angry

RunAwayWife · 26/04/2011 19:56

DS1 is now 14 and still the same, he got called Gay at school the other week and said " I am so not gay, if I were I would have a belt that matches my shoes and a better hair cut Grin

He also got call a gay Nazi by a kid in his class and came back with ....

"Despite the fact I am neither I could only be one because in case you did not notice the Nazis were a tad homophobic, so while you decide which name to call me I shall goose step in to the corner and wave my rainbow flag"

(it would seem children is schools these days love to bandy the word gay about as an insult)

anonacfr · 26/04/2011 20:01

RunAwayWife your son is the coolest 14 year old ever Grin

CrystalQueen · 26/04/2011 20:03

I thought this was going to be a thread about childfree ceremonies. Damn.

PiaThreeTimes · 26/04/2011 20:03

Hilarious The Onion! I love the "If I were a lesbian..." quote too! Grin

That's going to have be sniggering all night now!

RunAwayWife · 26/04/2011 20:04

I am very proud of him, of both my boys, I hope I have taught them to be tolerant of people and judge them on who they are and not their race, colour, sexuality or whatever

HappyCapybara · 26/04/2011 20:05

Run I want to hug your DS1. He sounds fab although I am sorry he has to put up with such crap.

RunAwayWife · 26/04/2011 20:06

Thank you happy.

ohmyfucksy · 26/04/2011 20:08

YANBU.

It is really not that difficult to explain. People get married because they love each other. That's it.

You don't need to go into sex any more than you would if you were talking about a straight couple.

janajos · 26/04/2011 20:14

I don't want to be fair to your DH, but feel I must. I invited a male gay colleague for dinner with his DP recently and my DH's first reaction was (what about the kids? We have 3 boys!) I just laughed and said yes, what about them? We had a great evening, including the kids and DH was converted iykwim!! Don't know about the other problems, but maybe just jolly him along with this one without letting him get away with it, he needs to change his attitude, but gently gently might do it better.

anastaisia · 26/04/2011 20:18

YANBU

stripeywoollenhat · 26/04/2011 20:21

i think you should tell your friend about your h's attitude, so they have the opportunity to dis-invite him. it's their ceremony and i'm pretty sure they wouldn't want anyone with his attitude to attend.

sounds like an absolute charmer, btw.

LadyClariceCannockMonty · 26/04/2011 20:25

YANBU. In case you were still in any doubt. Smile Take the kids, have a lovely time, let him sulk.

And just to add to the other chorus: 'life style choice' Confused and 'the children have already been exposed to this lifestyle'. What the actual fuck?!?

wook · 26/04/2011 20:34

Tell dh that even the 1970s Sesame Street song 'We all sing with the same voice' has the lines 'I have one daddy/ I have two' so preschoolers from forty years ago are in fact more tolerant than he is Grin

FriedEggyAndSlippery · 26/04/2011 20:43

And more mature too, wook [cgrin]

DitaVonCheese · 26/04/2011 21:44

YANBU. I am really struggling to think of a way of interpreting "CPs are not appropriate for children" which isn't homophobic unless your H (or other poster above, can't remember username) just doesn't think weddings generally are appropriate for children. Since I can't think of one, I might have to conclude that HIBAT Wink

maypole1 · 26/04/2011 21:46

I would take the kids and leave him at home

TiggyD · 26/04/2011 22:03

It's best to get kids used to it before it becomes a novelty. I was travelling on the train to Brighton Pride one year and there were 2 children near me with their yummy mummy, and could hear one saying "Are we going to see the gays now? Is that a gay (out of window)? Are there lots of gays today?"

vmcd28 · 26/04/2011 22:14

Ok so I read this to dh and he said, "wtf?! Sounds like her dh is gay and doesn't know how to deal with it."

TransatlanticCityGirl · 26/04/2011 22:25

Yanbu

MardyBra · 27/04/2011 00:12

vmcd - I have a friend who has that theory - he feels that the men who are defensive and "keep their backs to the wall" are the ones who are the most insecure about their own sexuality.

Grumpla · 27/04/2011 00:17

TWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTT!!!!

He's a twat.

Sorry, it's really late, or I'd find something more constructive to say.

HipHopOpotomus · 27/04/2011 00:31

YANBU - why is he being do silly?