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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Need advice badly!!!

383 replies

worriedandneedsomeadvice · 25/04/2011 16:54

I've just been at the garden centre with my 7 month DD and my 4 year old cocker spaniel.

A man bent down to stroke my dog before I could tell him not to and my dog went for him. Badly. His hand was dripping blood immediately.

I apologised and apologised and my BIL (the manager of the garden centre) took over to make sure the man was okay so I could take the dog (and DD) out.

He's been a bit growly lately but has never done anything like this before.

I'm shaking. I don't know what's going to happen and I don't know what to do.

He's fantastic with my DD, gentle as a lamb with her but as I said, lately he's been growly, especially at children he doesn't know so I've made sure to keep him on a lead and mostly just at home. But he loves BIL so I always take him to the garden centre when we go...

I can't believe this has happened. I don't know what to do. I'm waiting for BIL to call me, but the mans hand looked terrible... Absolutely dripping with blood. It was so quick.

Please give me some advice if you can??

OP posts:
VeryStressedMum · 26/04/2011 19:43

What colour is your dog OP? Sorry if you've said I haven't read all 11 pages! It has nothing to do with it of course I'm just wondering.
I've heard a lot about aggression in golden cockers. We had a golden cocker and loved her to death but she was the most anti-social and aggressive dog! Not to us but we wouldn't have trusted her with anyone else.

Tsil · 26/04/2011 19:44

Worried - can I just say that I love you for your commitment to the dog. My dogs are my babies and are as valued as any other member of the family. I know they are dogs with instincts but it doesn't stop me loving them.

Just as a question to the wider audience of people baying for the poor dogs life. If one of your children got into a situation where the only way they could see to protect themselves would be to hurt someone else would you advocate the death penalty? Especially if they had never shown anger or aggression before and they were protecting themselves or others?

TheOriginalFAB · 26/04/2011 19:45

I don't think it is sensible to have a dog sleeping under the baby's crib, especially as the dog is clearly bothered by something. You didn't say how long he had been growling for.

VeryStressedMum · 26/04/2011 19:48

Maybe the dog was startled or scared when the man did that? Very silly of him, my lab is the most gentle and kind doggie ever, but how on earth is anyone to know that?! For all they know she's a killer dog.
Maybe your dog has an ear infection which hurts a bit? Our cocker had terrible ears - as does our lab now too!

wotnochocs · 26/04/2011 19:53

Dogs aren't put down as a punishment but to prevent them hurting anyone else.
Gog bites are a serious problemMy DC are frightened of dogs DS2 got bit by a dog when he was just walking past and paying no attention to it at all and my DB was recently bitten while walking on a public right of way past a farm.I do think action needs to be taken against all biters .I think dogs should be chipped, licensed and a database kept and it should be mandatory to report all dog bites.

BeerTricksPotter · 26/04/2011 19:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

VeryStressedMum · 26/04/2011 20:00

I have always told my children that should they ever hurt our dog and she bites then I will NOT be telling the DOG off! Not sure if that's the right thing to do but they shouldn't hurt the dog!!
Also I may feel differently about a savage attack compared to a nip.

When ds was a toddler he fell on our lab, luckily for all of us she is very gentle and did nothing. That time. But how could I blame the dog for reacting in a dog way when hurt?

Original poster
worriedandneedsomeadvice · 26/04/2011 20:04

He's a blue roan (black & White).

I personally think it's fine to have him sleeping under the crib, if she stirs or wakes up and I'm still asleep my dog comes and licks mine / DH's face to wake us up. I feel like if she was choking for instance or something else was wrong he'd do the same thing.

I've contacted someone Val gave me an email for and also have a police dog handler doing a home visit tomorrow to check my dog out.

The vet is screening for lots of stuff I think, but didn't spot anything obviously wrong. Did mention how lovely my dog usually is though...

He's been growling occasionally for a couple of weeks, but not with much frequency at first.

OP posts:
mnaddict · 26/04/2011 20:04

So you dont leave your baby alone with the dog but you let the dog sleep under your baby's crib whilst you are asleep? Wtf?! How do you know that one day your dog isnt going to bite you or a child "protecting" your baby? Or if you have another baby and your dog bites your older child to protect them. In any case, when your dog bit the man you were there and your dog was on a lead, didnt stop him biting did it? You cant keep the dog and your child seperate at all times and I dont see how you being there will make a difference tbh.

TheOriginalFAB · 26/04/2011 20:07

I can't understand how your dog has been behaving out of character for 2 weeks and you have done nothing.

Original poster
worriedandneedsomeadvice · 26/04/2011 20:08

Mnaddict - it's fine. He's fine, she's fine. What would you have me do exactly?? Have him killed? Rehome him for one mistake I don't fully yet understand the cause for?

Ridiculous.

OP posts:
Original poster
worriedandneedsomeadvice · 26/04/2011 20:10

Fab - the occasional growl isn't 'completely out of character' for a dog adjusting to a new baby / in the hot sun etc. Pipe down now, you don't have a valid point and you're annoying me.

OP posts:
mnaddict · 26/04/2011 20:14

worriedandneedsomeadvice Perhaps not leaving your dog and baby unattended whilst you sleep would be a good idea? I did not mention pts or rehoming however you are being very naive if you think this is safe even ignoring the fact that your dog has seriously injured a man whilst under supervision!

TheOriginalFAB · 26/04/2011 20:17

No need to be rude.

If you are so sure that everything is fine why are you annoyed?

worraliberty · 26/04/2011 20:25

Mnaddict - it's fine. He's fine, she's fine. What would you have me do exactly?? Have him killed? Rehome him for one mistake I don't fully yet understand the cause for?

I think the sensible thing to do would be to keep him away from your baby until you do fully understand the cause.

RumourOfAHurricane · 26/04/2011 20:29

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TheOriginalFAB · 26/04/2011 20:33

How is your son now, shineon? I hope he is okay and there will be no scaring. What is happening with the dog?

Original poster
worriedandneedsomeadvice · 26/04/2011 20:34

What happened to your son is very sad, but as with humans, don't tar all dogs with the same brush.

What were the circumstances?

OP posts:
RumourOfAHurricane · 26/04/2011 20:47

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rostbeef · 26/04/2011 20:56

I can't believe how aggro you are getting OP - you asked advice. You must see that for quite a few people when a dog bites badly it should be put down. I am not a dog owner so I appreciate that I won't feel as passionately about dogs but I am a HUMAN and I think that a dog that bites is a danger and should be dealt with. If your dog had bitten a child at the garden centre what would you feel?
As far as I am concerned if a dog had bitten me at a garden centre I would report it. ESPECIALLY if I saw that the owner had a baby. You cannot blame or trust the dog. It is an animal. Not a person, not a member of the family. An animal.

Original poster
worriedandneedsomeadvice · 26/04/2011 20:59

You aren't a dog owner so I can forgive your ignorance in the matter.

It's exactly the point that my dog is a member of my family, and isn't disposable.

OP posts:
RumourOfAHurricane · 26/04/2011 21:02

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rostbeef · 26/04/2011 21:04

Lets hope poor garden centre man is as forgiving as you.

You know the dog, you know whats best for your family but be careful: the dog has not proved that he can be trusted after years of being a lovely animal, unfortunately with this one mistake all he has proved is that he is NOT to be trusted. Your baby is vulnerable so be aware that you cannot completely trust the dog, that is a fact!

soverylucky · 26/04/2011 21:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
worriedandneedsomeadvice · 26/04/2011 21:05

Well, I'm not going to report it and thankfully it doesn't look like anyone else is either...

I've seen the vet.
I've made an appointment with a police dog handler.
I've made steps to contact a behaviourist.
I'm going to muzzle my dog when out.
My baby won't be alone in a room with my dog until this is sorted.

What else would you have me do? It's more than enough.

OP posts: