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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not want DS to be left with 80 year old grandmother and her 40 year old toy boy?

96 replies

CrazyOrCautious · 25/04/2011 00:00

Grandmother is staying for Easter and has her 40 year old boyfriend with her. I have met him once before and he appears (surprise, surprise) to have mental health issues. Paranoia, agoraphobia, etc, etc. For example he asked for all of the windows to be locked so he didn't jump out and accused my mum of trying to blind him with a light on the end of a pen (in the middle of the day).

My grandmother is quite def and wouldn't be able to catch DS if he bolted but umm...well I guess quite with it.

I think I'm just finding the situation a bit odd and I'm not sure I want DS being left with a man I don't know.

She has asked twice now if she and boyfriend can look after DS tomorrow, I get the impression it is mainly for her boyfriend. Him an DS seem to get on.

So AIBU not to trust my grandmother's judgment?

OP posts:
HalfPastWine · 25/04/2011 00:02

YANBU imo

GreenEyesandHam · 25/04/2011 00:03

Depends.

If your DS is 17, I'd say it's ok Wink

applechutney · 25/04/2011 00:03

YABU!

Dear God, please let this be a wind-up...

applechutney · 25/04/2011 00:04

Sorry, meant YANBU!

Original poster
CrazyOrCautious · 25/04/2011 00:05

He is 4, apple why do you think I'm being unreasonable?

OP posts:
Spenguin · 25/04/2011 00:05

Hell no

and amen to applechutney

You seem to have a bad feeling about this guy as it is...go with that.

Original poster
CrazyOrCautious · 25/04/2011 00:06

Oh ok few Smile and no not a wind up.

OP posts:
AgentZigzag · 25/04/2011 00:06

Wow, she's 80 and is with a 40 YO??

Fucking good for her Smile

I'm with you on not leaving your DS with them if you don't feel comfortable with the bloke, that's totally your call (how old is DS BTW?).

80 eh? Grin

HalfPastWine · 25/04/2011 00:06

You're gran is a horny old bird isn't she, pulling blokes at 80 ! :)

EllieG · 25/04/2011 00:06

YANBU depending on age of your DS - I wouldn't leave my little one with someone I didn't know and someone who wasn't physically able to respond to her.

Original poster
CrazyOrCautious · 25/04/2011 00:07

It's not a wond up I promise. Couldn't make this stuff up eh?

OP posts:
EllieG · 25/04/2011 00:07

Oh - I see 4 - no YANBU in that case.

Original poster
CrazyOrCautious · 25/04/2011 00:07

Wind*

OP posts:
Original poster
CrazyOrCautious · 25/04/2011 00:08

They met threw Guardian soul mates, I aways wonder what there adds said Grin

OP posts:
chipmonkey · 25/04/2011 00:12

You sure your granny and her toy boy haven't been in "Take a Break" Wink
YANBU, the boyfriend sounds unstable.

EllieG · 25/04/2011 00:13

Hey CM! (sorry for thread hijack)

Original poster
CrazyOrCautious · 25/04/2011 00:16

Ha well if she has she hasn't told me. I would suggest it but I don't think it would go down very well.

She lives about 3 hours away and only has her boyfriend for company so don't want to create problems.

Am wandering how to go about this tactfully.

OP posts:
applechutney · 25/04/2011 00:18

This would make the best reality TV ever...

Original poster
CrazyOrCautious · 25/04/2011 00:21

Eeeek not sure I would want to watch.

OP posts:
Original poster
CrazyOrCautious · 25/04/2011 00:23

Terrible typos, sorry.

OP posts:
chipmonkey · 25/04/2011 00:38

Hey Ellie!Grin

Rhinestone · 25/04/2011 00:53

Surprised you need to ask. You don't know him and quite frankly, a 40 yr old going out with an 80 hr old is not normal. (No disrespect to your DGM!). Plus he's behaves in a way which is inappropriate around small children.

Original poster
CrazyOrCautious · 25/04/2011 00:57

I didn't really want to say it but your right it isn't normal. It bothers me a little but have to live and let live. But you're all right, doesn't mean my son should be looked after by them.

The way he has behaved so far, despite being odd hasn't bothered me or DS to much but I guess it's the potential for it to get worse.

OP posts:
ihatecbeebies · 25/04/2011 00:59

Yanbu, I wouldn't leave my 4yr old DS with someone I didn't know, especially if I was already unsure of him

Original poster
CrazyOrCautious · 25/04/2011 01:06

My Gran is usually so together and was teaching up untill about 10 years ago but I just can't get my head round this one.

OP posts: