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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be a bit annoyed that some lads peed in a bottle and then poured it on my DD

108 replies

shandyleer · 21/04/2011 15:18

I'm not BU,I know I'm not. And I'm also not annoyed, I'm spitting feathers, but I don't know what to do about what happened, and I'm hoping for lots of outraged comments from you lot.

Yesterday, Dd (16) went with four of her friends to a local riverside where lots of kids hang out on nice days. There was a large group of 20 or so girls and boys, similarly aged to herself (she thinks). They began picking on her because she has red hair (dyed red). She ignored them, they then started picking on the other girls and surrounded them. Dd tried to reason with them by saying that they were all there for the same reason, and why couldn't they leave each other alone and why were they picking on people when they didn't even know them. Next thing she knows, lad approached with a pop bottle and pours/chucks it over her hair - and it was urine.

Dd and friends left at this point and rang dh from local train station (after having waited for train for nearly an hour). Dh went back to riverside with them but the group had gone. I'm so upset for her, she was more upset last night than I've seen her in quite some time, and I don't blame her at all.

OP posts:
FriedEggyAndSlippery · 21/04/2011 15:41

OMG how horrible. I agree with police. At the least it's battery (IIRC) but probably more because it was urine. Damage to clothes etc maybe? Did you take photos?

That is so disgusting.

saffy85 · 21/04/2011 15:41

Report it. Horrible, vile thing to do to anyone, let alone unprovoked. They've quite possibly done it before and will do it again and they revolting little fuckers shouldn't get away with it! Angry

muminthemiddle · 21/04/2011 15:42

Rainbow- because how else will her dd be able to identify them?
My dh would deal with it himself along with some very strong mates of his.Yes I would happily let him smack the little tramp and humiliate him into never doing it agian.

Quenelle · 21/04/2011 15:42

Yes report them to the police. Also for the intimidating behaviour beforehand.

Previous poster is right, your DD should know that people can't get away with treating her and her friend that way.

MadamDeathstare · 21/04/2011 15:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

RevoltingPeasant · 21/04/2011 15:55

Agree report it.

They obviously had it planned, as weeing in a bottle is not just something you do on the spur of the moment Hmm so as a PP said, they may well have done it to someone else.

madwomanintheattic · 21/04/2011 15:57

any clues which school they were from?

i'd be reporting to the police and getting the community police to do their jobs and visit all the local 6th forms and lecture them on the seriousness of the incident, and possible consequences, and ask for anyone with any details to come forward.

i doubt anything will come of it tbh, but at least dd will know that it has been taken seriously, and hopefully the perpetrators will get a bit of a jolt.

nasty little worms.

shandyleer · 21/04/2011 15:58

Ok, thanks everyone, seems pretty unanimous I should ring police. Will do so. I just cant get my head round people doing something so vile.

OP posts:
Goblinchild · 21/04/2011 15:58

'My dh would deal with it himself along with some very strong mates of his.Yes I would happily let him smack the little tramp and humiliate him into never doing it agian.'

Is it worth your OH risking a prison sentence for assault, possibly on a child under 18?
OP should report it to the police.

madwomanintheattic · 21/04/2011 16:07

muminthemiddle - nice. you must be so proud. have you planned the jeremy kyle follow-up as well? Biscuit

muminthemiddle · 21/04/2011 16:13

Don't be stupid madwoman-what can the police do? they don't have any idea who did this and tbh are probably upto their neck in other crimes .
fwiw I have never had to deal with this so your assumptions are wrong. Noone has ever done this to anyone I know hence my outrage that such people exist, you though might be more familiar with this type of behaviour and person.
You carry on watching the J kyle show I don't watch it. It isn't my style dear.

madwomanintheattic · 21/04/2011 16:17

i'm not even in the country and never watch jk lol.

but you know what? if your dh can work out who the kids are and give them a good kicking, so can the cops.

and getting round all the schools and warning everyone off would do a lot more good than getting your lovely dh a criminal record for assault on a minor.

give max clifford a ring too. i bet he could line him up nicely.

rofl @ 'dear' btw. nice touch.

confuddledDOTcom · 21/04/2011 16:19

Definitely report it. Don't worry about knowing who they are, I reported some kids throwing snowballs at the windows (we are quite far from the road so they were throwing them hard) once and the police knew from how many/ ages who it was as it turned out they'd battered an old man for telling them to pack it in 5 minutes later. They already had information about it and I was able to back up what they knew too.

muminthemiddle · 21/04/2011 16:21

You mentioned the J kyle show so you obviously have seen it or why mention it?
Whatever anyway.
I am simply angry for the op and her poor dd.
Would feel like killing the culprits tbh.

SkinittingFluffyBunnyBonnets · 21/04/2011 16:22

Shandy Sorry this happened.... this happened to me when I lived in London...I got followed and harrassed by some lads in a car and when I told them to eff off they chucked piss over me....tell DD that those kids who did this will get bitten on the arse by Karma...their lives must be very sad, empty and devoid of love.

Pity them.

madwomanintheattic · 21/04/2011 16:24

feeling like killing them is fine.

sending your dh round to beat up kids, even if they are little shits, is not.

even on an anonymous internet forum.

newchelsea · 21/04/2011 16:31

You are most definitely NOT being unreasonable. That is assault and if it goes unreported those boys will never understand that their behaviour is TOTALLY unacceptable.

Your poor DD. She needs lots of love and support as that was actually a very traumatic experience for her.

LoveBeingAbleToNamechange · 21/04/2011 17:11

Throwing water is classed as assualt so this will defo be taken seriously and as you say was planned.

lunafire · 21/04/2011 17:37

I had a pint poured over me by a particularly nasty customer when I worked in a pub many years ago. The police were called because he refused to leave and the officers that attended said what he had done was assault and did I want to make a statement...so yes what they did to your DD is defo assault, and as bodily fluids were involved a particularly nasty one Sad. I would really urge you to report it. Gawd knows what else they get up to for fun Angry

shandyleer · 22/04/2011 18:14

Just an update - rang the police yesterday, they logged it and said they would pass details onto one of the community officers. The woman I spoke to was horrified at what had happened. She did laugh though when she asked me what type of bottle the lad had used and I said "I think it was lemonade". She was wanting info more along the lines of what size bottle it was and was it plastic etc, rather than what it had contained. Oops, silly me Grin.

Thank you all for comments.

OP posts:
mamas12 · 22/04/2011 18:28

well done for reporting it op. Do you happen to have any sodden clothes left that dna could be retrieved???

FabbyChic · 22/04/2011 18:33

What happened to your daughter was really mean, and is assault I am glad you have reported it to the police.

It might be a good idea in future if when she goes out she has somewhere specific to go, to do, like cinema, shopping, not hanging around a riverside where there are gangs of no good for nothing louts.

TheMonster · 22/04/2011 18:36

PLease report it. What an awful thing to happen.

albania · 22/04/2011 18:38

So if they had a bottle of piss there already, they were planning it? That's awful... Perhaps it would be worth mentioning to your DD that they were just looking for a victim, she didn't do anything wrong in trying to stop them from picking on her and her friends

I'm glad you've reported it to the police

MollieO · 22/04/2011 18:41

Glad you reported it. It is assault and the police need to tackle this group now before they go on to do worse. I'm surprised they aren't arranging to take your dd's statement.