To wonder why MN's so concerned with class

[ivykaty44]

Is it envy, is that what it boils down to pure envy of someone else and they might be doing better.

Even the cycling threads end up with class being brought into the mix.

Why is class brought into so many thread - even this one!

That's brilliant LeQueen ...still think 'welcome to the jungle' would be an awesome 'first dance' though!!!

LeQ, you and me are obviously brothers from another mother. My gaff aint georgian though - it is over 100 years old and is crumbling. Can I be in your class hybrid gang whilst embracing my prole roots?!

I'm middle class, my father is upper middle towards upper class, my mother has scraped and clawed her way into the middle classes and by God does she let you know about it .

i don't think it has to do with money or education it's more to do with a certain set of attitudes that are inherently there or they're not. Despite my middle class roots i do plenty of chavvy things .

And trust me having lived a stones throw or in cheshire all my life class has little to do with wealth. Alderley Edge is populated by rich working class people with their dcs at the private schools, and wealthy thick footballers and their wives and kids. They live in vile mock tudor mansions and drive horrible tacky looking sports cars and 4x4.

As for cross class marriage it does exist. Dh is as working class as they come. And I'll admit bridging the gap is tough, not so much with him but with his family.

MN is obsessed with class because MN is English.

I am a rich feral.

Best of both worlds, you get the money and the freedom to not give a fuck.

Jesus some people. I have a brand new big fuck off house full of books..........ner fucking ner.

Joking aside, I do think that this fasination with class is a uniquely British obsession. I don't live in the UK anymore, here there are just rednecks/non rednecks.

I love that when I speak to people with my slight Mancunian accent that they don't automatically judge me. I come from a working class background, i'm educated, I have whole walls covered in books, I had a bottle of wine last night that I bought direct from the vineyard where it was made, all ver ver middle class, doesn't make ME MC though.

Nah I like my views on life. I don't feel unfree. It's easier if I am surrounded by people who are quite similar. The pil make me tense.

So what radio do people listen to? I can listen to 6 music but even then there are dropped ts, overtalky djs.

bananagrabber (great name btw!) - Unless you can prove that you sailed to the New Land in 3rd class with the "Jacks" of the world I'm afraid I'm going to have to have "MC" stamped in your passport.

Regional accents just don't cut it else, with the modern and widespread "estuary", only one small village on the border of Bucks/Berks would be able to call itself MC!

Cross class marriage/relationships exist for sure - my books "is" ever so fancy according to my boyfriend's family! But then I greatly admire their open support, love, and appreciation rather than the "stiff upper lip" and "don't upset your father" bollocks. Homogenise us all!

Anyway, IMO class is also about things like how you talk to restaurant staff, whether you hold doors open for others, so actually perhaps class = manners.

Btw, I live in Europe and class certainly exists here!

well said Bonsoir!

I think I'm fairly solidly upper middle class (but didn't go to uni) but DH is/was working class (RG uni though). DH's grandparents were all solidly working class but his parents (a teacher and an engineer) with lots and lots of books and more than enough money, were/are not middle class. They remain/ed much too chippy and resentful of everyone they regarded as better off than them. Crossing the divide with DH hasn't been difficult in the slightest, crossing it with them has been a nightmare. I love DH to bits but can see that 20 years on life would have been so much easier if there had been no chasm and on occasion DH has had to have his confidence bolstered.

This is fascinating!

Me - I tick every bloody MC box - BUT - I am my own person and I genuinely don't give a damn what others think.
We have plenty of dosh but shop in Asda and B&M Bargains. I wouldn't give house room to Emma Fecking Bridgewater and my wardrobe consists of jods, TS jeans and uggs.

The kids have ponies and ski. We go on holiday to Tuscany. Today however, they are in nylon footie kits.
DH is the most highly educated person I know and he eats in the street.
I like a pint and the occasional rollie.

But I can do Boden and , " Oh my giddy aunt that's just so, SO sweetie " with the best of 'em.

I am a class enigma!

"The more I read here the more confused I am about what class I'm supposed to be"

If you don't know what class you are, you are middle class - the upper and working classes know they are, there is no confusion. It's the sprawling MC who are confused.

Was similar with my ex LeQ- I got a strong impression his aprents wonderd why they out him through fee paying and uni only for him to marry a council estate girl (they were OK, I bolted before the wedding- decent education does not make a great personality!0.

And every step of the way since (think I told you this before!) I have met hurdles by imagining things to do with the end result- so waving teh degree I was apaprently too stupid to get but actually attained with a higher classification in his face; and I have to say that today, in the aftermath of an A from my MA Research module, I wuld dearly love to encounter any one of them!. I am not claiing to be nice, but at least I have used to well!

Well I am very . Because I just had a break through on the Pil front. Went to work got back and the children were playing happily, washing done etc etc

I DID used to feel tense, but as of today I can see the positives. They have changed quite a lot since I met them. Anyway am pleased!

I am happy as I am too Jajas.

LeQ you've hit the nail on the head

" As a result DH was an enigma - a brilliant brain but didn't know which cutlery to use in a restaurant and had never been to the theatre in his life. Those first few years were often strained, because there was so much about my life and my family that he didn't understand (he didn't realise for example that my parents would expect him to stand up when my Mum came into the room, or open doors for women). "

DH just sometimes STILL 12 years in doesn't get it. He doesn't get why I cringe inwardly at his behaviour towards staff in restaurants, why i get embarrassed sometimes whilst we're out because there are certain social rules he just doesn't get, although his intelligence particularly for logic is off the scale. MiL is low intelligence, lacking in common sense and rude. FiL has a brilliant mind but, and forgive my words, behaves like a complete freak, lives like a tramp, doesn't know how to socialise, very selfish. They do my head in, they are also (separately as they're no longer together) both very bitter uncouth and ungracious. My stress levels are always on the roof at ocassions such as dcs baptism as to how they'll behave. BiL isn't much better, no awareness of how to conduct a conversation and extremely immature.

My parents however are socially adept and charming and with exceptional manners to wards EVERYONE. I think with dhs family it's the lack of manners that really grates.