To really really not get 'naming ceremonies'

[Gemsy83]

I mean- why???

Marianne- Oh no, i was just checking that YOUR church takes some literal stances from the Bible.

I already replied to your dull tradition question ages ago.

Erm, I'm an atheist, and I advocate the idea of love, peace and tolerance...

Do all you christians think us non-christians are somewhat uncivilised? Because on the most part, your religion is common sense. Tis all.

dontcallmepeanut - Yes, actually, if the family is not religious. My parents gave me a Christening, because they wanted a ceremony/party for themselves. Neither of them believe in God. I've always felt that this was an utterly bizarre way to behave for them.

Ive already stated the difference between weddings and a 'naming' ceremony. A wedding joins two people, legal and spiritually. A naming ceremony invites people to coo over a baby and have a party.

No peanut, of course atheists have ethics too, often much more sophisticated ethics than many Christians :)

And yes, agree about the common sense.

I'll agree with the non-Christians having children christened. Last time I attended a christening, I felt like a damn hypocrite. But surely the non-religious ceremony can be a nice touch, depending on how it's played out.

It all seems a bit "you can formally invite the baby into the family IF you're religious... If you aren't religious, then having the baby welcomed into the fammily formally doesn't matter"

dontcalleme you ahve the wrong peson!

Thats exactly who I am NOT- someone who puts Christinaity on a pedastal. Hene the world faiths degree and former membership of the humanism movement.

just becuase one body says that does not mean nobody else can, does it?

A christening is about welcoming a child into their faith- not into their family.

Phew, Marianne... I was worrying that I was some throwback, there....

Oh dear, this is one of the times when not having kids makes me snigger a little.

Naming ceremonies are not pointless, they're fantastic. How else would I manage to learn and remember all the different names applied to fundamentally similar small screamy bundles you people push at me?*

• Note: I am Not Completely Serious. I know your child is a wonderful bundle of joy, a blessing to the world, and of course the most important thing in my life was recognizing little Tom/James/Olivia/Mathew/Sophie's place in the world from the moment of his/her birth.

But, um, naming ceremonies do give that teensy bit of memory reinforcement that some of us, who're not entirely hung up on our friends' new babies, need.

Gemsy, it's both... (after all, doesn't christianity preach that we are all one big family?)

Peachy, it was just the way it came across... It sounded very "it's christian not to kill"... I didn't mean any offence

No probs dontcallme

Was directly replying to LOTM but of course it enver gives a full picture

As much as I think a naming ceremony is a bit odd, it is more honest than people getting their kids christened when they hardly ever go to church.

My sister had a 'naming ceremony' for DN2, it wasn't a big party just immediate family and the close friends they chose as 'guide parents' and a picnic in one of their favourite places in the countryside. The reason they did this is because they had DN1 christened just as they were comin to the end of their belief in Christianity (DSis has said the ceremony really highlighted to them that they didn't believe in it anymore) DN2 was born 5 years later and they didn't want her to miss out on those special people and keepsakes but didn't want to be hypocrites either.

It was a lovely day, very simple with just a few words spoken by her parents and then readings and promises from the guide parents.

If we do this for DD1 then that would be the most important aspect for me, to ask some very special people to be there for her in case we can't be. To guide and advise her spiritually and morally, if she ever needs help or someone to turn to that is not us. Even though I think there are certain of our friends this will happen with naturally I think it would be nice to have it formalised (but in a very informal way) to give those people a special place jn our extended family.

Events like naming ceremonies / baby blessings etc are part of a rite of passage which most communities in the world celebrate for major life events - birth, death, marriage. In most places these symbolic rituals have been linked with community traditions and/or religious ceremonies. Many people in the UK are not now part of an organised religion yet rites of passge are no less important to them.

The marking of key rites of passage can be an important psychological process and as traditional ceremonies reduce in number others emerge to replace them. Personally I find school 'proms' a ridiculous concept but I can see that for those involved it can be an important process to mark the end of one phase of life and the transition into the next.

I do somewhat object to the implications by some, that because DH and I are not religious, then we are also immoral, unethical, valueless, uncaring, thoughtless and so on and have no reason to dwell on or celebrate how amazingn a new child is and the joy of our friends and family. I was raised Catholic, DH CofE, both confirmed and both have thought about what we truly believe as adults and come to the conclusion (individually, beofre we met) that the Church is not for us. I am a Humanist, and possibly these words from the British Humanist Association website may shed a different light on atheism to those who have been so dismissive of non-believers.

"Humanists are atheists and agnostics who make sense of the world using reason, experience and shared human values. We take responsibility for our actions and base our ethics on the goals of human welfare, happiness and fulfilment. We seek to make the best of the one life we have by creating meaning and purpose for ourselves, individually and together."

I think those words apply to many poeple BikeRunSki: if not almost all?

I am nowadays a Quaker. As part of that I absolutely accept my own role in welafre and choice of morals. But less formally, I think very few woudl honestly not fall under that- including Atheists, Agnnostics and beleivers (in all faiths).

The few that do would be those with a very literal interpretation of tehir own faith and I do struggle to understand that, much as it is their individual right. If my faith told me to reject the tings that I believe are postive- such as tolerance of gay people, equality etc, then i woudl absolutely walk away. I might not be able to make myself stop beleiveing but there's no way anyone would ever know.

If you 'get' birthday parties, why is there a problem getting your head around a naming party? Lots of posters have explained it very well now.

Why not celebrate a child coming into the world? It's a good a reason as celebrating a union between two adults and you get that.

Never come across them before to be honest.

Why is it 'rude' to not get why someone does something? Why take it so personally?

Right back atcha

What about funerals?
We had a Humanist one for my sister as none off us were religious.
It was done perfectly without mention of God or religion. If someone want's a naming ceremony and has no God, then they are entitled to look for an alternative, just as in marriage and death.

I first came across Humanism at a funeral; it was the first time I had been to such an event that felt right; it was perfect and personal for the family involved.

Me too BikeSki - I have been to a Humanist wedding as well. Much more personal.

Party to celebrate a new baby? Lovely.

Calling it a 'naming ceromony'? Boak.