kids going to school hungry and tired

[dearyme]

www.bbc.co.uk/news/education-13081777

is this poor parenting or real poverty - or a mixture of both?

More than three-quarters of 627 primary, secondary and college teachers in England, Wales and Northern Ireland who responded to the survey believed they taught pupils living in poverty.

Of those, 80% said students came to school tired, 73% said they arrived hungry and 67% said they wore worn-out clothes or lacked the proper uniform.

GloriaSmut, that reminds me of a thread on MN a while back about a mum who was really shocked when her son's school gave her a bag of clothes for her child to wear because he must have looked so bad or smelt or whatever. She was really angry, if I recall correctly.

just listened to a phone in on radio 2, many teachers etc phoned in, extremely depressing listening :(

Tired - Can't always say it's poor parenting. When I was young I would wait until my mother was asleep and then play video games, usually until I passed out or couldn't do it anymore. That was not my mother's fault in the slightest. She took the video games away from me, I found them and this went on until my mother just didn't bother anymore. I would never blame my mother for me being tired.

Plus, another reason why I was tired at an older age was nightmares and insomnia. Nothing my mother could do but comfort me on the rare occasion I would go to her.

Hungry - Can be a sign of poverty. Me and my mother were poor but could still afford to have breakfast. However, I tended to opt out despite my mother saying I should really have breakfast, as I just didn't feel hungry at that particular time or didn't want to eat. As I grew older I was bullied because of my weight, and started skipping out on meals despite my mother objecting, because I thought I was fat.

Worn out clothing - Uniforms are notoriously expensive. This can be a sign of poverty. If the uniforms are constantly dirty it could be a sign the child is very active, or it could be a sign of neglect.

I don't think poverty is the reason for all cases of tiredness, hunger or poor uniform, but it can be a reason for some cases.

"Coming to school tired is poor parenting"

Not necessarily. DD went to bed at a reasonable time, had no mobile,tv or computer in room and had real problems getting to sleep, then couldn't get up in the morning. She would still be awake at 12 some nights. I tried everything. She is a very bright girl who often had trouble turning her mind off.

Uniforms constantly dirty wouldn't be a sign of being active. A child coming into school in the morning may have concievably got 1 or 2 stains on their uniform from breakfast or journey to school, but the uniform wouldn't actually be dirty at this point in the day.

Gloria I agree. I actually thought for a moment the 'plentiful benefits' remark was a joke. Sadly not.

Hello people in Internet world, real life would like quick word..... That there are sadly far too many neglectful parents doesn't mean there aren't genuine reasons for lack of sleep, food, clothes and washing etc.

I brought up a child on income support for years before I got out of my relationship. (I have a job so society approves of me now). He was always clean, fed and well-slept but I had the benefit of a good childhood myself and appreciated the importance of those things.

There is a vicious circle to be broken, something that Labour set up Sure start centres to help combat.

Jeez tis a good job I'm on my phone else I could feel an 8 page rant coming on....

It's bad parenting.

Benefits are designed to feed, clothe and house. They aren't designed to be plentiful and nor should they be.

I send dd2 to school with dirty clothes (i can't affrod enough sets of uniform and cant was them fast enough, she gets so messy), some days she's tired (because she doesn't sleep), sometimes she's hungry as she refusses to eat breakfast. DD1 goes to school with clean uniform (as she's not messy), she eats her breakfast and sleeps well most nights so is wide awake.

I don't think its about money (how much does breakfast cost?), i think its down to lots of things, poor parenting, young carers, parents on drugs/alchol and lazy parents.

Theres a child in dd1's year who is always scruffy (hair not brushed, dirty face, holes in shoes), it doesn't cost money to brush hair or wash a childs face, i know shoes can cost the earth but you can also pick them up for £5-£10 in Asda or Tesco's.

dd2 - okay you may not have many sets of uniform. I had 2 pairs of trousers - no skirt for most of my teenage years. But you can wash and dry things overnight, so the uniform shouldn't actually be dirty. As long as you have 2 of everything - except blazers/coats, only need 1 of these. BTW I don't class a few stains as being dirty, although most of these should come out with a wet cloth/bit of soap rather than a full wash.

Don't your school do second hand uniform sales?

My son's school do have second hand uniform sales. They are always at 11am which is no help at all.

So you could talk to some of the parents running it and ask if you can reserve specific pieces if available. Or the school staff if you want it to be more discreet.

At DC's expensive fee paying school there are plenty of well laundered uniforms. And the top formers look like matadors in their cropped trousers and bolero blazers...DD looked like she was on the Kings Road circa 1962 her last summer dress was so short.

I suspect there are holey shoes too in June.

But this is miles away from children who are neglected. Children whose parents don't wash them or provide soap and towels. Children who don't own a toothbrush. Children whose parents don't get up with them in the mornings.

lol at well laundered matador uniforms

heh heh

There is no reason for kids to be dirty at the start of a day. My 13 year old is a sweaty little bugger so I make him get a shower and run his shirt through the wash, quick iron when it comes out and it's dry by the morning - no hassle, and he doesn't smell. 15 year old lives in the bath so I needn't worry about him but it's my job as a mother to push the 13 year old into keeping up his personal hygiene. The teens often bugger off to school without eating properly but they have to be in school a fair bit earlier than other two still in primary so by now I think they're more than capable of making a bowl of cereal or some toast so if they are hungry it's their lookout. Especially if they didn't bother because they used up their time on the PS3. I get up with the little'uns as they leave.

There is one family at the primary whose kids always look filthy and scruffy, they wear clothes either miles too big or too small and some of the uhmmm variations on the uniform have been so bad you can see other parents looking at them a bit embarrassed. Yet their parents are often in the local Tesco buying booze and frivolous crap, they just don't seem the kind of people who would have any pride in their kid's appearance or grasp the concept of making sure four and five year old children, left to their own devices will end up looking a holy show.

sorry were their is primark and tesco no one need go out with pants is poor parenting as these so called parents in poverty all ways seem to have money for 10 b&h

I am sure people sometimes think mine are neglected - ds is thin (poor eater and incredibly active) wakes and eats breakfast quite early so is often tired and could be getting hungry not long after school starts...wear secondhand uniform and not always clean on, never ironed (don't believe in ironing and have strong views on environment and over-use of household appliances!) DD (11) often escapes without brushing her hair and her gerbils have chewed the sleeves of her sweatshirt...and their shoes!

It can be one or the other or a mix of both, to say it is black and white is ridiculous. As said, SS involvement and provision of services varies alot between Local Authorities. Some families are coping with very difficult circumstances; being careers to family members and partner, having a undiagnosed disabled child etc. Sadly things are not going to improve, because of SS cuts, children who are neglected are not going to get investigated in most areas.

They were talking about this on the radio this morning and one teaching assistant had reported having to call parents of a child who had infected toes because their feet were being squashed into too small shoes. It's heartbreaking to hear and read about these stories. Some of this may be poverty related but I'm convinced it's mainly neglect/parents who don't give a toss. I think if I was a teacher, I'd want to take the kids home with me and give them something decent to eat/wear and a good wash and make them feel like someone does care.

As I pointed out earlier on the similar thread in chat, these kids do live in poverty, but the poverty is foisted upon them by parental neglect.

So does ink stains count as dirty. Most of dc's polo shirts have them on and I really camn't be bothered to buy new ones. Even worse I purchased a summer from 2nd hand sale and guess what it had an ink stain too. My nursery aged ds fell asleep at school the other afternoon. Should i expect a knock on the door from ss?

wine00 no of course not.

It's the kids who aren't washed for weeks or turn up at school with no food for lunch and their dear parents have spent all the money on scratch-cards.

wine00, that can't be a serious question can it?
Ink stains FFS.
Ho ho ho.

Was a (little) tongue in cheek.